From the Heart of Mexico

Chapter 14 - "Visions"

2012-02-08T02:59:00.000-06:00

Tommy (my oldest son) has big, big plans to visit the other little villages one day. One night, as we were traveling back home, he pulled the van over...well, actually he stopped in the middle of the road, because there is no place to pull off the road. From San Cristóbal, you go down, down, down until you reach the bottom of the valley where San Lucas is located. So at a certain point along the way, at night, you can see the lights of village after village, the most incredible sight. I was sitting right behind Tommy, and he said, "Mom, I'm just going to get out and look at this." In the darkness, no one saw my tears, but I could imagine Daddy getting out, or getting off his donkey, and looking out over that vast valley, seeing past the lights, into homes and hearts, and wondering if anyone would ever go and take them the Gospel.

You know that verse that talks about Mary pondering? I think that must be what that means, and she must have felt like I felt that night, pondering and pondering...my mind and my body were so tired, but God gave me a little more strength to feel joy unspeakable. (Excerpt from a letter to my children.)

The dictionary defines “vision” as the act or power of anticipating that which will or may come to be: prophetic vision;

Have you ever had a vision? Don’t go all spooky on me, now. If you know me, you know I’m the most “un-spooky” person you’ve ever met.

This book is about my children and what I learned from living with them for twenty-three years (the length of time I home-mothered: from the time the first one was born, until the last one was married.) Boy, did I learn a lot from them!

But let me tell you a story from my childhood…actually I was a young adult at the time.

I practically grew up on the mission field of Mexico with my three little brothers. This story probably happened when my middle brother, Lanny, was about 15. My parents were out of town, my “little” brother, Tommy had by then left for Bible College, and my “baby” brother, David, was with my parents. One night I was fixing to go to bed. It was very hot…no air conditioner, so I had my windows open. I turned off the light, and as I was opening my curtain to let the cool evening breeze in, I noticed a figure under the beautiful big shade tree in our front yard. We lived out in the country, right on the highway, and evidently a bum, or a drunk had wandered up in our yard, and helped himself to bedding down for the night in a chair, which was leaning up against the tree. I was sure he wasn’t there to harm me, but just to have a safe place to snooze for a few hours. Still, I couldn’t bring myself to lie down and sleep, knowing a strange who-knows-what was in my yard.

So I did what any red blooded girl would do: I went in and woke up my teenage brother. “Come here,” I know I scared the daylights out of him, “there’s a man under the tree in the front yard.”

He was a mighty brave about-15-year-old, and shot out the door, as if just waiting for an adventure. “Be careful,” I warned him, and I can’t remember to save me if he grabbed a weapon. I think a machete would have been the only one available.

I ran back to my window to watch the scene. Looking back, I don’t know what on earth I would have done if the stranger had attacked him. There were no cell phones back then, and we had no house phone. The nearest neighbor was across the highway, and I would have had to run right past the villain to get help.

I watched as slowly and quietly my brave little guardian angel slipped carefully past my bedroom window, out toward the tree. I could hear my heart, and thought it would beat right out my ears!

But to my surprise, when he reached the ax murderer, he grabbed the empty chair, and turned around, and just shook his head at me. What appeared to be a man leaning up against the tree was just an empty chair someone had left earlier while seeking a shade from the hot sun. My vision turned out to be a harmless chair, with eerie shadows cast from the tree, creating the form of a man in my imagination.

My little sleepy headed brother came calmly back into the house, but I praised him for his bravery. He had no idea what he would confront out there in the dark, but he was willing to risk his life for me.

My adventure turned out to be just a vision formed by the illusion of the shadow cast by that old tree, and probably my wild imagination.

That’s a good story, but it’s not the kind of vision I want to tell you about…the visions I had when my children were growing up.

Neither am I talking about the mystic visions people say they have of angels or devils, or of their future husband.

I’m talking about the vision defined above; I guess a “prophetic vision,” although I’m not a prophetess. There’s a Scripture in the book of Luke in the Bible that has always grabbed my attention ever since I became a mother. It’s a comment about perhaps one of the most famous mothers of all time, Mary, the mother of Jesus. It’s found in Luke 2:19, and it says, “But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.” I’ve always “envisioned” Mary sitting there in the stable, right after the shepherds had visited her newborn Son. “To ponder” means according to the dictionary, “to weigh in the mind with thoroughness and care. To reflect or consider with thoroughness”

Can you even begin to imagine what Mary was pondering in those quiet moments right after her Baby’s birth? I can remember so vividly sitting up in my hospital bed (eight times, to be exact) and looking into the face of my precious little baby I had just brought into the world, and “pondering, and pondering and pondering: What will he be when he grows up?...has her husband already been born?...will she someday be sitting here, holding her newborn in her arms?...what will those little hands hold someday?...will he be a doctor like his Daddy?...”

I can almost “hear” you nodding your head. You’ve been there, haven’t you, Mom? Dreams…ambitions…visions!

I can close my eyes, and see him standing there. It’s 7:00 in the morning, really too early for a three-year old to be out of the house. But he determined to go with me every morning, Monday through Friday to my little class next to our house. We lived in a little village called Ixtapa back in the 70’s, and my husband had decided it would be good for the little boys in our boys’ home, to have a Bible lesson every morning. We had taken these little boys, mostly street urchins, some their destitute mothers brought to us. Every morning they would march off to the village school. But before they put “book learnin’” into their little heads, I would teach them a short Bible lesson, go over their memory work, and then teach them a song we would be learning for the children’s choir.

My little boy would stand up as tall as his little legs would allow, open his little mouth as wide as he could, and sing with all his heart.

One morning, I had a vision. I don’t know what else to call it. I was playing my accordion and the boys were singing, just like they did every morning. But this morning was different. Suddenly, my little son looked like the choir boy on a Christmas card. And my mind fast-forwarded about twenty years. He was standing before a large congregation singing with all his might in the most beautiful tenor voice I have ever heard.

As quickly as it appeared, it went away, and was completely forgotten…

…until years and years later. He was in Bible College, and he was singing with his brothers and sisters at a Christmas banquet. There he stood, as handsome as any young man I had ever seen. Suddenly, as if the Lord turned back the clock, I was standing in a little Indian village, accordion strapped to me, and I was looking into the little face of a little choir boy.

A vision? A dream? I don’t know. I never shared this story with anyone until now. Not even back in the 70’s with his Daddy. I think I must have doubted my little country boy could ever stand in a nice church in the USA, much less sing at a fancy American college Banquet. Someone thought he was good enough to sing, though. His music teacher thought he had potential…enough to record a CD with him.

Yesterday, I wrote my weekly e-mail to all eight of my children and their spouses, and I told the story I included at the beginning of this chapter. While I was having “visions” of the past, my son was having a “vision” of the future. I hope he will do the same thing with his children.

Look at those pudgy little hands. What do you see? Let your imagination run wild. I did that early morning, when there was absolutely no one else around to envision in my little boy what he could someday become. Looking back, I don’t think even I believed it enough to share that vision with his Daddy. So impossible!

Impossible?

You know what visions do? They build skyscrapers, and they go to the moon, and they swim the English Channel.

The next time you wash your baby’s hair, or trim her nails, or tie another shoestring, “ponder.”

That’s what that college music professor did with my son.

That’s what my pastor, Dr. Jim Vineyard, did with college kids. He envisioned pastors, and writers, and musicians, and missionaries. He envisioned unlikely kids with diplomas marching across the platform on graduation day.

Don’t limit your vision to the now. Visions turn drab rainy days into exciting challenges. If visions can change a pile of dirty laundry into neatly ironed and folded clothes, if that’s what keeps you diligently working and working until it’s all put away, imagine what visions can do to a stay-at-home mom while she’s explaining a Math problem, or giving out Spelling words.

Sometimes we labor at mommy-ing without a vision. I certainly did. Now that I’m a full-grown Mom, I have the joy of looking back, which is the opposite of vision.

I watch him in the pulpit, reading his passage for the Sunday morning service, and I think, “Wow, I taught that preacher to read!”

She’s a mommy now, and I’m amazed at how she can juggle housework, homework, church work, and six children…at the same time sometimes. And I wow her with, “I don’t see how you do it!” Her response? “Mom, you used to do it with eight!”

I never had a vision of my little girl watching me clean beans, give out spelling words at the same time, and dreaming that one day she would be doing the same thing. But she does!

I never listened, and listened and listened and listened to my little son while he stumbled over the words in his reading exercise, and think, “WOW! I’m teaching a preacher to read!” But I was.

I never dreamed while I listened to him recite the Declaration of Independence, that one day he would entertain a Vice Prime Minister. But he does.

If he’s flying a kite, will he someday be flying Air Force One?

Stumbling through her piano lesson? She could be a concert pianist in your vision, in your dream.

Let’s face it, Mom. Your job right now could be downright nightmarish, when you think of your responsibility. How I flubbed it so many times! I would go to bed at night, and visions of criminals, and druggies danced in my head. That “what’s-the-use” feeling of absolutely being a failure.

I wish I had been smart enough to realize who was putting those visions in my head. It certainly wasn’t the Lord. So when you-know-who puts those negative visions in your head, run him off to where he came from.

Do you want to be successful at anything? You can’t without a vision, whether it’s taking off 20 pounds by envisioning yourself in your dream dress, or tackling that closet by envisioning neatly organized shelves. Can’t do it!

Or maybe you can produce “dream kids” without a vision. I know Moms who didn’t half try, and they have marvelous children, who are mature, responsible adults. But wouldn’t it be fun someday, as you hear a wonderful inspiring sermon, or watch your little girl knead bread while listening to your grandchild recite poetry, and watch as that vision you had 20 years ago unfolds into reality?

Nothin’ like it!

And absolutely nothin’ like mothering. I’m still doing it!

How to Prosper, How to Fail

2012-01-31T02:48:00.000-06:00

“And he sought God…and as long as he sought the Lord, God made him to prosper.”

II Chronicles 26:5

Have you written your New Year’s resolutions? I have, and you know what? They’re the same ones I had last year. We wish each other a “Happy New Year,” and others wish us a “Happy One” right back.

When we wish happiness for each other, what we’re really saying is “I hope you’re prosperous this year.” I want to be prosperous in 2012, not materially, but spiritually. I desire to draw closer to God than I did in 2011. I think when you get right down to it, “to be prosperous” is to “be blessed.” Well, there’s no better place to find the “formula” for “prosperity, or blessings, or happiness” than in the Word of God.

Some months ago, I was reading in the book of II Chronicles the story of a king named Uzziah. He was only sixteen years old when the people of Judah took him and made him king. Uzziah feared God. The Bible says, “he did that which was right in the sight of the Lord,” (v. 4)

If you want to have a Happy New Year, if you want to be “blessed,” and prosperous, you need to:

Do right. Perhaps in the eyes of men you can be successful by lying, living an immoral lifestyle, and mistreating others in order to reach your goals this year. But when you do that, you’re not doing that which is right, and the key phrase is “in the sight of the Lord.” As long as Uzziah did what was right, God “made him to prosper.” I’ve heard it said, “Do right though the stars fall.” But we can only do right, when we know what’s right. The will of God in our lives, the “what’s right” is found in the Word of God. One of your resolutions for this year should be to “read the Bible through.” Start in Genesis, and read it all the way through to the end of Revelation. Even though you don’t understand what you’re reading, read it anyway. If you’ll dedicate just twenty minutes every morning to systematically reading the Bible, in one year you will have finished reading it through. January has already gone? Then start now to read it through, and start all over in February of next year. Dedicate another fifteen minutes to memorizing verses and chapters, one new verse every week. Teach them to your children and grandchildren. There are many methods, many books that encourage people to memorize Scripture. There are even clubs that children can join, organized with the purpose of stimulating children’s memory to “hide the Word in their hearts.” But it’s you, Mom, who are responsible for that, not the church. I don’t know what your routine or your lifestyle is. But there’s nothing more important that you can include in the lives of your children than learning Bible verses by memory.

Uzziah was a good man, and he did what was right, and as long as he did what was right, God made him to prosper. What a simple formula!

But who of us can qualify as a good person, like the people we read of in the Bible? Well, even the good men, like King David, had their weaknesses.

There are at least three sins of which Uzziah was guilty in this story. If we’re honest these same three sins can be a hindrance to God’s prospering us this year.

One of Uzziah’s weaknesses was his pride. “But when he was strong, his heart was lifted up to his destruction:” (verse 16) Sometimes success is the worst thing that can happen to us, because we’re lifted up in pride. Think about your goals you’ve set for this year. Why do you want to achieve what you want to achieve? If pride, the desire to have more, or to be better than others motivates you to do more this year than you did last year, this could be a reason for God’s failure to prosper you. Do you remember the story in the Bible of the mother of James and John? Matthew 20: 21 and 22 say she went to Jesus, and asked a favor of Him. She said, “Grant that these my two sons may sit, the one on thy right hand, and the other on the left, in thy kingdom.” She wanted a place of preeminence for her sons, to show them off. Pride manifests itself in many ways in our lives. Sometimes we’re proud without even realizing it, because pride is very subtle. When we interrupt a conversation we’re showing a proud spirit with this attitude: “I know more than you do. What you’re saying is boring to me…it’s not as important as my opinion.” I don’t know if I just have a very critical spirit, but lately I’ve noticed how common it is for people not to pay attention to what others are saying. Sometimes it’s hard to detect. But when someone is very distracted when others are talking, at the same time it may be possible that the person talking is very boring, it could very well be for lack of courtesy. That’s a sign of pride. Sometimes I’m talking with someone, and some little something will distract them. It’s because they’re not interested in what I’m saying. When this happens with one of my children, I stand in front of the wall, and start talking to my curtain. It’s very obvious what I’m doing. Maybe the word “bless” would be a better choice of words than “prosper.” I love the phrase some of my friends have written to me this year, “May you have a year full of the blessings of God,” which means, “May you have a prosperous year.”
Uzziah rebelled against God. He entered the temple to make sacrifice and to burn incense upon the altar. This was the office of the priest, and the priest could even resist the king in this matter. Uzziah’s rebellion was manifested when he disrespected the position of the priest. How about you? Do you respect your husband’s position? What about the position of your son in law in his home? And the authority of your Pastor? The Bible says that “rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft…” I Samuel 15:23 I say this kindly, but this year, let’s not be witches.
Lack of self control. Uzziah got angry. He had the censer in his hand to burn it. While he was “wroth” or angry, “the leprosy even rose up in his forehead before the priests…” (V. 19) This was the instant judgment of God. I haven’t seen your resolutions for this year, but I’m sure that most of them, if not all of them require discipline…self control. Have you decided to take off some pounds this year? That requires self control. Do you want to read the Bible through this year? You’re going to have to discipline yourself, get control of yourself. We all get angry, we lose control. We say things, we do things that we wish we hadn’t said or done. We should ask the Lord every morning of this year to take control of our actions, our thoughts, and even our moods. Do you ever wake up in a bad mood? You know what? It’s my very personal opinion that every woman should get up before anyone else in her household. Why? Because we set the atmosphere in our home, whether we’re a wife, mother or grandmother. The lady of the house sets the mood of her children, her husband and her grandchildren. The First Person every lady should meet in the morning is the Lord…He’ll help you to start your day in a good mood. No one likes to get out of bed on a cold morning. During the winter months, our bed is more delicious than any other time of the year. But just tell God, “Lord, help me to have enough character to get up, and spend time alone with You.” Guess what! Did you know He wants to spend time with you, more than you want to spend it with Him?

As long as Uzziah sought the Lord, God made him to prosper. As long as he did what was right, he was prosperous. But when he was lifted up in pride, when he rebelled, and when he lost his temper, “the leprosy even rose up in his forehead before the priests in the house of the Lord, from beside the incense altar.” (v. 19) “And Uzziah the king was a leper unto the day of his death, and dwelt in a several house; for he was cut off from the house of the Lord:…” (v. 21)

Imagine being a queen one day, surrounded by people who serve you, and probably love you, who live for your comfort, and the next moment to live in a “several house;” …apart, alone, with no one to care for you. Does that sound like people you know who are in nursing homes? What a lonely life some people live. My heart goes out to them. But I often wonder how many lonely elderly people are where they are, because when they were younger, they didn’t seek the Lord. Maybe they were rebellious, and proud, and had no control over their temper, and they lost their children. Their family rejects them, as though they had leprosy.

Just like King Uzziah, you can enjoy the prosperity of God today in your life. But if you don’t seek Him, you’ll end up like the king did, apart from those who surround you today.

What does 2012 hold for you? Prosperity or loneliness? Blessings or curses? It’s up to you!

Chapter 13 - "Letter to Lorie"

2012-01-06T15:06:00.000-06:00

I have two desks…one in my bedroom that I use when my houseis full of children and grandchildren, and one in my living room. This desk Iuse exclusively for e-mailing (because I don’t have good coverage in mybedroom), or when my house is empty and quiet.

I’m sitting at my living room desk this morning, so you knowI’m all alone.

Because I live across the drive from our church here, andbecause some of my children live within walking distance of my house, I usuallysit at my bedroom desk for my early morning writing. Except for the men whocame out for 6:00 prayer meeting this morning, I have enjoyed delicious peaceand quiet, and at the risk of sounding pious, which I’m not, I’ve enjoyedfellowshipping with the Lord this morning.

Unless you have lived in a busy, noisy house for most ofyour life, you have no idea how I treasure these rare times…getting up in themorning to a peaceful house, with exactly the amount of dirty dishes I left inthe sink last night…none, when I’m alone.

I love watching daybreak through my living room window,walking outside and into our peaceful church building, to turn off the outsidelights.

But there’s an obvious downside to solitude. There’s no onearound, specifically, no children.

We, and especially I, need to be so careful that we don’ttake things and people for granted. I love solitude because it’s so rare to me.But what about the lonely widows all over the world, or the ladies who neverhad children, or the elderly grandmothers in nursing homes whose children haveforgotten them (although sometimes it may be their fault). I must constantlyremind myself of how very, very blessed I am to be literally surrounded bypeople who love me, and whom I love.

While I thank the Lord every morning for this specialalone-time He’s given to me, I also know that with time, this could begin toturn into loneliness and boredom because of the lack of challenge of seeing anice clean house, and all the laundry done. Those are things that keep my lifefull of “up hills,” and the joy and satisfaction of finally having all thosedishes done and actually put away. When I’m alone, those tasks are mere“few-minute-jobs,” and sooner or later turn into routine. There’s no longerpleasure in seeing all my counter tops clean, laundry folded and put away, andnot one single thing out of order.

Always-full-cupboards take on a ho-hum effect, and I don’teven have to check to see if I’m out of eggs, since I’m the only one baking andeating here.

With that in mind, I would like to direct this chapter tothose mothers who would consider my life right now like a vacation to a lovelyPacific island, or wherever she would like to be…anywhere except where she isright now…surrounded…no, overwhelmed with housework, homework, church work,mission work, and just work in general.

I’m writing this on New Year’s Eve, and always this time ofthe year, my mind goes back to our children’s college years…the hardestmothering years of my life. In a few days, my children would be returning tocollege after a two-week Christmas vacation.

Several times in the last few days I have either receivede-mails, or talked with ladies whose children will soon be leaving home. In mostof these cases, this child is the firstborn, and so a first for these moms.

So I’ve been trying to put myself in their places, andempathize with them. How easy that is for me!

Several months ago, I received an e-mail from a lovelymissionary wife/mom. They were fixing to say goodbye to their firstborn. WOW!What vivid memories that brought to my mind. So I share with you the letter Iwrote in response to her e-mail. I have changed names, and a few circumstancesand places “to protect the innocent.”

DearestLorie, (not her real name)

I havealready marked July 10 on my calendar with "Smith’s return to Africawithout college child," because I'm assuming the child you are leavingbehind will be starting college, and that she will be attending Bible College.

My heartgoes out to you, and I have absolutely no words of comfort to offer. For twelve years I waved good bye more times than I care to remember to oureight children, and I can truthfully say that college years were the hardestpart of my mothering years. If your family is like ours was, there willbe tears. You will try to cram all the fun into the last days, and giveher all the advice and money you can possible part with.

There willbe those many "just one last hug." I remember thinking,"I don't want to forget what her hair smells like"...or "Will heremember to change his sheets at least once a week? Will he run out oftoothpaste?"

If you askme, Lorie, that's when we really truly "give our children to theLord." Dedicating her to the Lord on a Sunday morning when she's anewborn is only symbolic; and we did it with all eight of our children. If I ever did shed tears on those occasions, they were merely sentimental.

Tears shedwhile driving away from the dorm, and looking out the back window until youcan't see him anymore (what if he runs out to tell me something, just as I lookaway?)...those are the true tears at the very core of what it means to be amother, and literally give him back to the Lord.

And althoughI can't do one single thing to ease your almost physical pain of that parting,I can assure you with all my heart...looking back, as if I were looking throughthe back window of our old van...looking back over the past nine years sinceour last one graduated, it is one of the best decisions you will ever make.

Ourchildren are sinners, and they married sinners, and made little sinners. But if my children ever have amounted to anything for the Lord, in part, and ina huge, huge part, it is because of all the people who influenced their livesduring those grueling years: our pastor most of all; their teachers,classmates (well, some of them), the kids they picked up on their bus routes;members of the church; and pastors and missionaries, whom they wouldhave never in a million years ever met had they not been attending BibleCollege. I believe David is a missionary to Ukraine today partly becauseof the influence of a Russian missionary he had the honor of picking up at theairport and escorting during his college years.

Yourchildren probably need Bible College more than the average child who attends agood church in America, simply because he DOESN’T attend a good church inAmerica. I can't tell you how ignorant our children were in almosteverything from singing in a choir, to eating in a cafeteria. Theircollege years gave them (don't laugh) poise and confidence. Our childrenneeded the exposure to all that they needed in order to be who they are today,and to do what they do. Never could my husband and I have given them allthat.

A few weeksago one of my children called me early one morning. "Mom, Ijust wanted to call you and thank you for all you've done for me through theyears. I believe I'm serving the Lord today because of you." And I said, "You are who you are because of many, many people God has putinto your life." And probably most of those people were there duringhis college years.

Please knowthat on July 10, my prayers and thoughts will be with you, as well as the daysbefore and after your departure.

Yourfriend,
Mrs. BillieSloan
Nahum 1:7

I have shared that letter with you for two reasons:

1. Ifyou’re a “college mom,” or if you’re fixing to say goodbye to your child whowill soon be leaving the nest, take heart. This is part of being a mom.Remember, your child needs the people God puts in her life in order to becomethe person He wants her to be. I’m assuming, of course, that your child isleaving with your blessings.

2. Recently,three of my daughters and I were privileged to get to spend a week together,without babies, homeschooling, or housework. What precious memories we madetogether! One of my daughters commented, “I feel like I’ve been on a honeymoonwith Jesus.” I told her, “One of these days, you are going to suddenly wake upto a quiet house. All your children will be gone. You’ll go downstairs, andeverything will be in order, and there won’t be one single toy or one straysock in the floor. You’re going to leisurely pour your coffee, and have yourquiet time without having your ear tuned to the baby’s bedroom the minute shewakes up. And you’re going to remember how simple life was back then…noisy andbusy, but simple.” If you’re longing for a little peace and quiet, a littlefreedom from incessant laundry and wiping runny noses, and senseless dusting offurniture, fast-forward your life for a few minutes. One of these days, you’llbe sitting at your “empty-house-desk,” wishing with all your heart that yourlife were as simple as the days when the most important decision you had tomake was whether to have mashed potatoes or macaroni and cheese to go with theroast you just put in the oven.

Happy New Year from my daughter's family

2011-12-27T01:47:00.000-06:00

My daughter Ruth, with her husband Steve and six children: Steven, Abigail, Elisabeth, Benjamin, Levi and Caleb:

Prayer Letter - December 2011

2011-12-24T16:10:00.002-06:00

JOHN 3:16

DECEMBER, 2011

Dear friends and loved ones,

Because I write this "prayer letter" to you every two months, each morning, during my quiet time, I write down things concerning my ministry that I feel might be a blessing and an encouragement to you. This helps me to better focus, for the most part, on the positive things in my life. Any negative report to you is so that you can know better how to pray for me.

Looking over my list of "things to report" during the months of October and November, I see nothing but positive! And at just 6 days away from my 68th Birthday, I'd say "that's just like God." I would like to "brag on God," as my husband, who has been in Heaven now for seven years, used to say.

Two of my grandsons, Josh and Sam, were saved and baptized during the month of October. These two little brothers are blessed to have parents like Philip and Liz, who have trained them in the ways of the Lord. What a blessing it is to go to one of Ulises and Elizabeth's three churches once a month and teach their ladies' Thursday Bible classes! They will soon be moving the church in Ixtapa out to the property that God has provided for them, and where their orphanage will be located. Souls continue to be saved through their hospital ministry, and one Sunday I was privileged to watch as he baptized a young military sergeant and his wife. Lety was among the six military wives we honored at our Banquet this year. Each lady received a long-stem rose and a Bible.

What an honor it was to be part of the Spanish Ladies' Spectacular in Hammond, IN, this year! Pastor DeAnda and Ellie treated me like a queen. My daughters, Sarah, Anna, and Ruthie with baby Caleb added a "family reunion/girls-time-out" flavor as we made unforgettable memories. Thank you, Pastor, for helping to provide this for us.

On November 16, my son, Tommy and his wife, Mona, and their five children arrived. They have rented a house, and plan to start a Christian radio ministry. They're already involved in every part of the work here.

It is a joy to see little souls saved in my Saturday children's classes. Keeps me young, too! Remember Jesús, the father of the little girl who was killed down the street from our class? He was recently saved in Ulises' church! Thank you for your prayers.

Every month new ladies are attending, and being reached with the Gospel through our ladies' prayer breakfasts. This ministry is actually for the purpose of praying for our annual Ladies' Christmas Banquet, and all the First Ladies of our town, as well as neighboring towns. We encourage these special ladies to attend, so they can hear their names called out in prayer.

At this year's banquet, we set a record attendance of 98 ladies, including five First Ladies. For the first time we honored military wives. There were six present. Pastor James Merlo did a splendid job preaching a very clear salvation message. I'm happy to report that there were seven ladies saved, including two First Ladies, and two military wives. One of these ladies was at church on Sunday with her sergeant husband. Thank you for your prayers. We're already making big plans for November 16, 2012's Banquet.

Another unexpected result of our banquet this year was the salvation of Javier. Javier was a waiter in a restaurant where our family used to eat out when our children were all at home, many years ago. He has since been appointed to serve as City Councilman. This summer I was privileged to win his daughter to the Lord. She attended our Banquet this year for the first time, and was so touched by the presentation of the orphans we invite every year, that she convinced her (in her words) "hard-hearted Dad" to accompany her to the orphanage in the nearby town. Because of his position in our city, she wanted him to see if there was anything he could do to help these children. She said he melted, as the children sang and quoted Scriptures for them. But the clincher was when one of the little girls crawled up into his lap. It was easy for Pastor Carlos, the head of the orphanage, to then win Javier to the Lord!

I've talked too long, but as I look back over my letter, wondering what I could possibly leave out, I tell myself, "How could I ever brag too much on the Lord?"

Your friend, who wishes you all of God's blessings as we approach a New Year!

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

Swallowed Up

2011-12-07T02:12:00.001-06:00

“…lest perhaps such aone should be swallowed up with overmuch sorrow.”

II Corinthians 2:7

I’m writing this at 8:59 Monday morning. Earlier, I wasthinking about two ladies who were not in my Sunday school class yesterday.They form part of the “pillars” of our church, and part of my personal “supportgroup.” You know what I’m talking about…the ladies who always have a sweet wordof encouragement, and who leave you feeling like you can make it, after all.

Both of my sweet friends “reported in” sick. And I’m surethey were. They both have serious health problems. But I believe at the root ofeven their physical problems lies an ailment common to most women: depression.I’m afraid when “my” ladies woke up yesterday morning, they were “swallowed upwith overmuch sorrow.”

Did you ever want to go to sleep and not wake up? Did youever wake up, and (like my friend said yesterday) “don’t have the strength tosit up?” Be careful! You may be on theverge of being swallowed up.

I love teaching children. And one of my favorite stories isJonah and the whale. You can make all kinds of dramatic effects. Just let yourwild imagination carry them down into the belly of the whale…the slime, anddarkness, and stink. Does that describe what you’re feeling this morning?

We’re going into the most joyous season of the year, when wecelebrate the birth of Jesus. I’m already looking forward to having half of mychildren, and fifteen of my grandchildren here. I love sitting in bed early inthe morning after prayer, and reading my Bible, and sipping my coffee, whileplanning all the things I want to do for those whom I love most of all onearth. But guess what! I’m also preparing my heart and mind to stay in tunewith God. With His help, I won’t go into a fit of depression as I stand in themiddle of the street, and wave to them until their Van gets out of sight.

I plan to have a lot to do after Christmas (not to mentionthe extra cleaning), preparing material for the publishing of a book, gettingready for a new ladies’ ministry. I don’t plan to cancel my ladies’ soulwinning afternoon. Quite the contrary, I’m planning something very special formy ladies, who faithfully come out, rain, shine, cold or hot, to knock doors,or go to the park and witness and hand out tracts.

When the jaws of depression lunge toward me, I’ll shut itsmouth, and refuse to be “swallowed up.”

How am I going to do this?

I’ll determine with myself. That’s what Paul did. He may have thought about all he had suffered, beatings, imprisonment, cold, hunger, and perhaps he was tempted to go into a fit of depression. But all alone, away from everyone else, Paul said, “I determined this with myself.” David did the same thing in I Samuel 30:6 “…but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God.” He encouraged HIMSELF. “David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him.” When the pressures of life, and sorrows come, get alone and determine with yourself that you’re not going to forget the blessings of God. Realize that Satan is the great “discourager” of the believer. He takes it on himself to see that you forget the wonderful things that God has given you, and done for you, and he makes you focus on the negative. In order to determine with yourself, include God. Get alone every day, preferably in the morning, and open your heart to Him. Tell Him your burdens, and do like Daniel did: “Daniel purposed in his heart.” Daniel 1:8
I won’t let my unhappy circumstances affect my mood, because my mood affects those around me. Paul said, “…I make you sorry,…” There are people whose presence brings a cloud into the room. Don’t ever think that you don’t affect others. We should bring joy into people’s lives, especially our family, those who live closest to us. Don’t let your sad mood reach those around you. Paul said he didn’t want to go to the Corinthians “in heaviness.” He knew his mood would affect others.
I won’t stop going to church, like my friends did yesterday. In Paul’s first epistle to the Corinthians, they repented of their sins. Sometimes our sin can be depressing. Two things that will help you more than anything else to overcome your sin, and come out of your depression are: daily Bible reading, and the preaching of the Word of God. Without those two elements in your life, it’s going to be hard to crawl out of the jaws of depression. The reason is simple: the reading of God’s Word, and its preaching are the two things that God uses to reveal our sins. Every morning before I read my Bible I pray this prayer: “Lord, speak to me through Your Word, and help me to be obedient to it. Help it to convict me, comfort me, and guide me, and show me a truth I’ve never seen before. Amen.” I pray that very same prayer when I leave my house to go to church, asking God to help the preaching of His Word to do the same thing.

It’s easy for me to be in a good mood, and to be happy whenI’m feeling good, and when I have money, or when the sun comes out. But whatabout the day when I don’t have good health or money, or when it’s raining? Iknow ladies who don’t have a lovely ministry like mine. For them, it’s aprivilege just to have their lost husbands give them permission to attendchurch, much less teach a class, or sing in the choir. They have no hope ofever having a ministry, outside ministering to their family. What can I say tothose precious ladies whose children have turned their backs on God, and oneverything she has taught them?

Focus on others. You can always find someone less fortunate than you. No matter how much you’re convinced that there is no one else who suffers like you do, there is. Look for her or him. Ask God to put them in your path so that you can be a blessing to them.
If possible, try not to associate with negative people, those who always see the bad in everything and in everyone. When I become critical and negative, it’s usually because I’ve lost my focus on the positive things God has done for me. I’m not satisfied with my work, so I blame others. Look for those people who love the Lord, and who have a purpose in life. Remember, just like depression is contagious, joy is also contagious.
Praise the Lord. Psalm 67:3 and 5 say “Let the people praise thee, O God; let all the people praise thee.” Just as we love hearing our husband and children express their appreciation for us, so does God. Have you told Him today that you love Him, and are thankful for the wonderful things He’s done for you? Can’t think of anything? Has He saved you? What a wonderful Salvation is yours! Tell Him how grateful you are for His sacrifice of love.
Don’t forget that God loves you. Do like Mrs. Cindy Schaap does, and look for ways He tells you, “I love you” every day. When you see the sunrise, tell Him, “I see Your love.” Walk out to your garden, and smell the lovely fragrance, and tell Him, “I smell Your love, Lord.” From now on, when you drink your favorite beverage, say “I taste Your love.” When you hear your private concert of birds singing in your back yard, tell Him, “I hear Your love.” When you feel the warmth of your favorite blanket, say “I feel Your love, God.” He loves you more than anyone on earth could love you. He loves you so much that He sent His Son to die on the cross for your sins.
“This too shall pass.” That’s not a quote from the Bible, but it’s true. Nothing is permanent. Nothing lasts forever, and neither will your situation last forever. Sometimes things, situations that God brings into our lives are to test us. Be faithful. Don’t give up. Divorce, suicide, abandoning our children or our responsibilities never, never solves anything. Quite the contrary, that can complicate life, and hinder God from getting the glory in the midst of your affliction. Trust the Lord. Everything is in His hands; He’ll carry you safely to the other side. Remember, the sun will shine again.
Place yourself in the Divine Potter’s hands. There are times when God allows us to pass through great trials and sorrows in order to conform us to His image, to mold us, and to make us the person He wants us to be. Sometimes He sends trials so we can comfort others who will someday go through the same thing we’re suffering. Let the Great Potter mold you, so that you can be a blessing to others.

"In the Potter's Hands"

2011-11-04T08:27:00.000-06:00

Prayer Request List for our 13th Annual Ladies' Christmas Banquet
November 28, 2011

1. Wisdom and discernment in all the plans and decisions to be made.

2. Extra strength for the girls and me as we plan and make preparations.

3. For our Lady City Mayor, Cecilia Flores, to be able to attend, as well as First Ladies of neighboring towns.

4. For the wives of the former mayors, and military wives to be able to attend.

5. For extra finances for the cost of the Banquet, Hotel reservations, and plane reservation for our guest speaker.

6. Preparation of the special music, and choice of each song.

7. For our guest speaker, Pastor James Merlo, as he prepares his message for the evening, and for liberty as he preaches.

8. For the Hotel staff to be reached with the Gospel.

9. That the Lord would prepare the hearts of the ladies who will be attending, and for many to be saved, who will be an influence to others. We have had ladies saved in every banquet for the past ten years, including two former First Ladies.

10. For wisdom for my son in law, Ulises Martínez, our Banquet administrator.

Note: This Banquet is an annual affair, and will be attended by ladies, who for the most part are unsaved, and who either because of religious preferences, or pressures from home, do not attend our Church. The Lord laid these dear ladies on my heart several years ago, and I am as burdened for them as I am for the ladies in my Sunday School Class.

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

Chapter 12 - "Memories of Mother"

2011-10-04T01:23:00.000-05:00

It would only seem fitting, in a book about my “kids” to include a chapter about my Mother. And today as I thought about her on what would have been her 91st birthday, I felt a wave of inspiration, as I combed my hair and wept over her memory.

In order to convey my emotions, and why I’m feeling this way, let me set the atmosphere: I’m all alone in a house that once vibrated with the happy noise of eight children. One of my favorite memories of my children, now scattered all over Mexico, and the rest of the world, oddly enough include Daddy and Mother, and their annual visits every Christmas. Against the desires of my brothers, they preferred road trips to flying. They loved each other probably more in their final years of marriage than they did when they were newlyweds. Rarely did anything (outside the death of Daddy) separate them. So these road trips across México, literally from the northern part to the “uttermost” as I used to call the southern-most state of México, served as a get-away for the love birds, stopping at their leisure, and leaving usually before daylight.

But now I’m alone this morning with my thoughts and emotions and tears. They’re both in Heaven, but this being the celebration of Mother’s birthday, I’ll write about her.

I attribute my emotions this morning to my personality. If you know me now, what I’m about to say is going to surprise you: I was a little introvert when I was a child, and even as a teenager, I was shy and a bit insecure, probably because during the crucial years of my teens, until I was 16, I was a “preacher’s kid,” and the “normal” kids at school never let me forget that.

But my earliest memory of the manifestation of my tender emotions was the day Johnny (his real name, honest!) passed me a note. We were in second grade, and back in those days, you were 7 years old and just learning to read. (There were no kindergartens! Mommies stayed home with babies, instead of carting them off to daycare, or “professionals” who are paid to do what old fashioned, stay at home moms should have the joy of doing. Who cared that Susie was 5 and still couldn’t read. That’s what bedtime and Mommies were for.) So imagine my delight when I opened the sheet of paper, and read, “LOOK. Love, Johnny.” And drawn in the middle of the two “o’s” were two eyeballs. So I looked back at him, and he threw me a kiss.

Unfortunately, the teacher also looked up at that precise moment.

This story would be totally irrelevant, except for what happened next, and my response: She made us stay in during recess. My little tender heart was broken, and I began to weep. I had never, never been punished in the entire two years of my attending school, and had never even been called down because of bad conduct. I cried all the way through recess, and I’m sure my teacher thought twice before she punished another little girl.

But through my tears, and my broken heart, visions of Mother came to my mind…at home caring for my little brother, hanging out clothes, and I had broken her heart. I would be a shame and a disgrace to her, and a huge disappointment. I longed for her to be there with me, so I could feel her arms around me, and tell me everything was going to be all right. How dare that teacher hurt my mother like that! I almost hated Johnny for breaking her heart. Mean ole Johnny, mean ole teacher! I was ready to go home, and I wanted my Daddy to come for me.

That childish emotion is exactly the one I felt this morning when I was thanking the Lord for giving me a wonderful Mother…thoughts of how I had hurt her. “She’s in Heaven, and I can imagine her being so happy with Daddy and Jesus. Does she know what’s going on down here on earth? Do saints who have gone before us know of earthy things? And I wept and wept. When she was here, her children were her joy and her delight. We’re what made her get up every morning after Daddy went to Heaven. Our visits were the highlight of her year, and would it break her heart to know the times I’ve done things that would have broken her heart, were she here?

“Dear God! Are my children going to do things after I’ve gone that would break my heart if I were here? What can I do now to make sure that what they do isn’t just to make me happy, and once I’m gone they’ll change?”

Am I living in a gilded cage, thinking that they love each other? That they love me? That they love the Lord?

What could I have done differently when they were little to avoid the conflicts between adult children?

I don’t know.

Raising children, good children, is a lot like Salvation: it’s all by grace, not of works lest any Mom should boast.

So I sit here this morning, remembering Mother, and the godly heritage she left my brothers and me, and our children, and our grandchildren, loving and serving the Lord, and I think, “She must have done something right.”

Chapter 11 - "When They Don't Call You Blessed"

2011-09-17T06:55:00.002-05:00

I hope this book would not sound “preachy” or even “teachy.” But looking back over my years as a mom, and the things I’ve gone through, I feel sorta like a person who has survived cancer, who knows what made me whole, and who must share that remedy with others; and to fail to do so would be a sin, or at the least heartless.

And since I’m writing a book, I must discipline myself to sit down at appointed times, and ask the Lord to help me share some experience in my life that is publish-worthy. If I weren’t writing a book, I probably would never have the opportunity of sharing these things with you. As I prayed while writing my book, Tom and Me, I must ask the Lord to help me to be open and honest without being indiscreet. As I write this very difficult chapter, I’ve already prayed that prayer. So here goes…

There are Scriptures in the Bible that I will never understand, although I’ve searched through commentaries, taken notes in every sermon I’ve ever sat through…unless, of course I was in Ukraine. I don’t speak Russian, and even if I did, I could never write what I understand.

Two of those verses are Proverbs 31:28, “Her children arise up and call her blessed;” and Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Based on my belief that the Bible is the Word of God, and it should be the foundation on which we build our lives, our marriages, and yes, train our children, I cannot deny either one of those Scriptures.

But I don’t understand them, and I won’t even try to explain them.

One of the hardest questions I am asked is: “How can I raise my children to serve the Lord?” So my answer is usually this: “If your children serve the Lord, it’s by the grace of God.”

And I tell you, Mom, the same: You raise children just like you do anything else. You read your Bible every day, be faithful in church, be submissive to your husband, and ask the Lord to help you meet the challenges of the day, which include those of being a mom. Just do right, and trust the Lord to make of those children what He would have them to be.

When children don’t call their moms blessed, which to me means serving her God; and when they DO indeed depart from the way they should go, does this mean that:
1) She’s not a virtuous woman?
2) She didn’t train them in the way they should go?

I don’t know. I won’t attempt to answer those questions. But believe me, I’ve been there, and I’m going to suggest some things first of all for the mother of young children, and then for moms who are there right now. Your teenager or your adult children have turned their backs on God, although they were raised in church, and you’ve done your best to train them in the ways of the Lord.

It’s easy to see why the sons of David and Eli didn’t call their fathers “blessed.” They made so many mistakes. We’re not going to mention their role as fathers, but if you like, you could read I Samuel 4, and II Samuel 12, and see the children of these men of God. David and Eli were successful in many areas of their lives, except in the most important one. We don’t have to ask ourselves why their sons didn’t serve God, why they were murderers, why they committed the lowest sins. The reason is obvious when we study the lives of these two fathers.

But I personally know women who are much better mothers then I am. They seem to be the Virtuous Woman herself described in Proverbs 31:10-31, and yet their children don’t serve the Lord.

I don’t have all the answers, but without being “preachy” here goes:

I. Mommie #1: You know all there is to know about mothering. You think this is easy. “If I just make it through potty-training; through homeschooling or homework; just wait until they leave for college…” I’ve been there, secretly planning my post-baby days. Come on, don’t tell me you never look at a motherless woman, and long for her freedom. The thoughts of getting to eat everything on your plate when you go out to eat; going to bed at night, and knowing that the next sound you hear will be that of your alarm clock, and not, “Mommie, I gotta…” I’ve been there, and it’s no fair that I can’t write this book and be self-righteous, if you can pretend you’ve never had thoughts like that. But there is one huge advantage you have over us older moms whose children have already left home: you still don’t get phone calls that turn your life upside down. You lie down at night, and know your baby is in the next room. You still have control over what she puts into her mouth, his playmates, and what he wears. So what can you do so that someday that child will rise up and call you blessed? What can you do to make sure, or at least do your part, to create a desire in the little one to serve the God you love?

There are at least two fathers in the Bible, whose children rebelled against them; these were wonderful fathers.

The story of the first Father Whose children didn’t call them “Blessed,” is found in Genesis 2:16 and 17, and He was God Himself. “And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.” God placed boundaries. The word “commanded” indicates that there were certain rules for man. He was the perfect Father. He made the first man and the first woman perfect. But they didn’t make Him happy. They didn’t bless Him. They disobeyed Him. God protected them, by placing boundaries around them in the beautiful Garden of Eden. He gave them some orders, and they disobeyed them. We should place boundaries around our children when they’re small. Just as God had to punish His children, taking them out of the Garden of Eden, we must punish our children while they’re still young, when they go outside the boundaries we have set for them. When a mother lets her child do anything he wants to do, she is preparing him to rebel against authority…his teachers at school, the policeman, the pastor, and God Himself. It’s much harder for a child who is rebellious, who has always been allowed to have her way, to one day accept Christ than for that child who has been taught to obey, and to respect authority. And consequently, that could be the reason for his some day not “calling you blessed.”

II. Mommie #2: that’s me, and you if your children are teenagers or adults.
The second father we find in the Bible whose son didn’t call him “blessed” is found in Luke 15:11-32. What we learn from him, we can observe in verse 20. “And he arose, and came to his father, But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him.”

A. When your child doesn’t call you blessed, turning their back on God, keep the lines of communication open. Never allow open sin, or a lifestyle unpleasing to God under your roof. But never, never close the door of your house, much less of your heart to your child. This father didn’t require his son to repent before he took him back. He was waiting for him. Never allow sin to be committed in your house, but precious Mom, when you say to your son or to your daughter, “I won’t speak to you until you return to God,” or “Until you confess your sin, and serve God, you can’t come into my house,” you’re hindering the Lord, through the Holy Spirit, to work in his heart. This could be the cause for their hardening their heart, and could even lead to suicide or to committing worse sins than those he is guilty of now. Your son knows you don’t approve of his lifestyle; your daughter knows the grief she’s causing you; they know they’re breaking God’s heart. You don’t need to place barriers between them and you in order for them to know that you don’t approve of their sin. Open your arms and your heart to that wayward son, your rebellious daughter; don’t reject them.

B. When your children don’t call you blessed, turn them loose. This might seem like a contradiction to the previous point, but it’s not. While you should open the doors of your house and your heart, wait until they knock. The father in our story didn’t go looking for his son. He left him alone, so that in God’s time he would return. In many cases, it’s best not to call your son, don’t send your daughter messages, or e-mails. She knows where you are; your son is the one who left, not you. Don’t tread where only the Holy Spirit can work. Don’t try to do the work of the Holy Spirit. Give Him all the space He needs.

C. When your children don’t call you blessed, bathe them in prayer. Commit your children to the Lord many times a day. Don’t you think this father prayed throughout the day for his son? I think he did. I believe he prayed believing, and he expected the Lord to answer his prayers, because apparently he knew the moment he returned. Probably every day he went out to watch the road that led to his house, and while he watched, he prayed. While he walked, he prayed. While he ate, he prayed. While he worked, he prayed. You don’t have time to pray? Do it while…every time you go to the bathroom, kneel down and pray for your child. Pray while…you wash dishes; while…you iron; while….you wait for the red light, or in the doctor’s office. While…you make your bed. If he’s far away from you, ask the Lord to put good people in his path, a Christian, a pastor, a missionary who will encourage your son or your daughter. Ask Him to keep all the bad people out of his path, all the negative people far from him. Pray believing that God will bring your child back to Him. I believe that father prayed believing. He wasn’t surprised when he saw him, even though he was still afar off.

D. It may sound strange, but sometimes our children don’t call us blessed because of our own sins. Do you have unconfessed sins? Is there something that isn’t consistent with your life at church and at home? Are you real? Are you transparent? Are you consistent? Do you criticize the preacher, and then call on him to counsel your daughter? If you criticize him in front of your children, why do you expect them to listen to him? If you’re a young mother, your children haven’t turned their backs on God. But prepare yourself for the day when you may be shedding tears over a rebellious son, a daughter who has dishonored you, who doesn’t call you blessed. I never prepare my lessons with a haughty spirit. I’ve never considered myself the authority on child rearing. Quite the contrary, when I prepare my lessons, most of the time it’s because I need to apply what I teach. Once a year I take spiritual inventory on Mother’s Day. When my children were small, I asked the Lord to show me anything that could be a hindrance for my children to serve Him. But now that they’re married, I still ask Him to help me to be the mother in law my sons in law need in order to be the husbands and fathers my daughters and grandchildren need them to be. I ask Him to help me to be the example of what a mother in law should be to my daughters in law, so that they can be the wives and mothers my sons and grandchildren need them to be. Every morning I pray this prayer for myself: “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23, 24.

Prayer Letter - August 2011

2011-08-31T01:27:00.004-05:00

4 year-old Camila, whose mom I led to the Lord, waits to receive her diploma from VBS.

Dear Friends and Family,

Just when I think my ministry responsibilities have reached their limit, God puts another “opportunity” in front of me.

A few months ago, God sent a young couple to our church. He was saved several years ago, but she is a new Christian. There’s nothing quite as refreshing as spending time with newborn babes in Christ, and Yessica is as vibrant a new Christian as I’ve ever been around. But more than that, she and Wilber are the reason for my brand new ministry: They’ve invited me to teach in their Bible Club in their neighborhood, and last Saturday at their second meeting, there were 98 in attendance, and 15 children were saved. It’s a delight to watch many of those children file into church on Sunday mornings as they bring them in on their van route. Do I have time to squeeze one more activity into my already full schedule? “Mom, we can take turns teaching if you like,” Anna offered. My response? “I love this, and I don’t want to give it up!”

Working with children keeps me young…or at least, thinking I’m young! Vacation Bible School…my 27th, since we started in our living room many years ago…saw a high attendance of 174, with a total of 31 professions of faith. I taught children this year, whose parents I taught many years ago.

But I still have a tender heart toward the ladies in my Sunday school class, and our ladies’ monthly prayer breakfasts. It has been my delight to have won three ladies to the Lord in our church, and I sometimes wonder if those ladies would have had more years to offer to the Lord had they been saved in someone’s children’s class when they were little girls.

June 12 was a Red Letter Day for our Church here, as we dedicated the land purchased for our building. Please pray for the Lord to provide for its construction, as we are rapidly out-growing our present facilities.

The month of June also included a trip to Chicago, where I spoke six times in Spanish at a Family Conference. Upon my return, Ulises and Elizabeth picked me up at the airport, and I took a sentimental journey to Ixtapa, where I attended their services the next day. I even made a new surrender to the Lord, to go anywhere He wanted me to go. So precious were the memories made more than thirty years ago…I could close my eyes and almost see a young doctor and his little family headed out to a village in their pickup to share the Gospel. Please pray for this “new” work, which actually began more than 37 years ago.

I ask you to start praying for our Annual Ladies’ Banquet which will take place on November 18. But you can do more than that: Pastor Corders, and the good people of Amistad Baptist Church in Del Rio, TX, have already asked me where to send their check. This is what I told him: Make it payable to Windsor Hills Baptist Church for Billie Sloan Banquet. Am I being presumptuous? Take it from one who knows: You can’t out-give God!

Your friend,
Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

One of a Kind!

2011-08-09T15:40:00.002-05:00

“...that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.”
I Corinthians 1:10

Most family and marital problems, most problems in the church wouldn’t exist if we would only learn one truth: WE’RE ALL DIFFERENT! WE’RE UNIQUE!

You’re one of a kind!

One of the favorite pastimes of my husband, who suffered with Parkinson’s disease the last 24 years of his life, was to go to town, and sit in the van and drink a Coke while he watched people pass by. Consequently, since I spent most of my time with him, it continues to be one of my favorites.

I remember one time, we were sitting outside Best Buy near Dallas, and our children had gone in to make a purchase. My husband suggested that he and I play a little game while we waited: “See that Jaguar parked over there?” (He once told me that if he had remained in the USA, and continued to practice pediatrics, instead of coming to México as a missionary, the car he owned would have been a Jaguar.) He continued to explain our little game: “Let’s see who can guess the owner of the Jaguar among the customers who leave the store.” I don’t remember who won the game, but what I do remember is that every person who walked out of that store was different…unique one from another, at least in their outward appearance.

I love to “study” people…not from our van as I did years ago, because my husband is in Heaven, and I’m the one who runs my errands now. But I watch people in air ports, on planes, while I wait in line at the grocery store, at the bank, and at Burger King. Sometimes I even play a little game by myself: “I wonder why that young man is buying diapers…Could it be that his wife is sick? Or dead? Is he a single Father?” Imagine! That’s the way gossip gets started!

Of all the lines where I’ve waited, of all the people of all ages and nationalities, that I’ve studied, my observation is this: NO TWO PEOPLE ARE ALIKE! They’re all different!

WE’RE ALL DIFFERENT! Each of us is one of a kind!

That’s the way God made us. Why do we have a problem with that? Yes, we do!

The problems begin when we try to change others to be what WE think they should be, so that they fit into OUR mold, 0UR plans for their lives.

If you’re a mother of young children, among your many responsibilities is to discipline, teach, instruct, educate and train. But guess what! Every child is different. My husband and I raised eight children, and not two of them are alike. Each one has his or her own personality. A baby has his own personality at birth. She’s equipped with certain tendencies, a definite temperament. The great job of a mother is to observe those characteristics, those temperaments, and train that little girl in such a way that she will develop those good qualities, and control the negative ones, or at least direct them in a positive way. For example, if you have a very aggressive little girl, at the same time you must train her to control her desire to always have her way, you should also direct that temperament in a positive way: for example, captain of the kitchen cleaning team!

If you work with children in a school, or in church or any other similar organization of children’s events, you should also apply these principles in dealing with children.

But what should you do about changing adults? What about your adult relationships, your teenage children, your husband, your married children?

1. DON’T TRY TO CHANGE THEM! The greatest challenge you will ever face is to change someone to fit your mold. Do you know someone like that? Of course, we all do. There are wives who are always trying to change their husbands so that they are hard workers, more responsible, more aggressive, and more ambitious. Not only do they have an impossible mission, they make life impossible for those around them, especially their husbands and their children. But also that wife, who always wants to change her husband, and her children, is one more frustrated woman, who is never satisfied. She doesn’t know how to appreciate the positive qualities of her husband, her children and others. Perhaps she’s a woman who always notices another woman’s things...even another woman’s husband and her children. “Why don’t you spend time with your children like my neighbor’s husband does?” “Or (God forbid) like my Dad does with his grandchildren?” One of the greatest mistakes a woman can make in her marriage, or in her role as Mom is to compare her husband or her children with others, “Your brother always made A’s in Math…”
2. ACCEPT OTHERS, just like they are. One day, sooner or later, you’re going to realize that the only way to live in peace is to accept people, things, and situations that you can’t change. I don’t like being short. I’d love to be taller. I struggle in the super market and on planes with things out of my reach. I always, always have to ask for help getting things down and back up, whether it’s my carry-on, or cans of Carnation milk. But even though I sometimes wear high heels, I’ll never be able to change the fact that God made me a little shorty. So I’ve learned to accept being shorter than most of the people around me. But guess what! I’ve met the nicest people because of my “disability.” In the grocery store I always have to wait for a tall lady or man to appear, and kindly ask them to reach the Diet Cokes for me. I’ve found that people are anxious to help a little short lady. It gives them a feeling of having done a kind act at the end of their day. I’ve never asked a gentleman to help me store my carry-on, that at the time of our arrival, he didn’t remember to get it back down for me. My short stature has turned out to be a blessing…because I’ve accepted it. Many times when a person feels our approval, he responds in a positive way. Instead of saying, “My husband always leaves his dirty clothes on the floor,” if you accept your role and privilege as his helpmeet, your task will turn into a ministry instead of a job you don’t feel you deserve. And guess what! Maybe when you quit complaining, God will work a miracle in his heart, and your sweetie will start putting his dirty clothes in the dirty clothes hamper. What person in your life, what situation is driving you crazy? Accept him or her or it. Maybe you’re sick. You’ve done everything possible, you’ve gone to doctors, and you don’t improve. Accept your illness. God can turn it into a blessing, like He did with my stature. There are women who are missing out on so many blessings because they refuse to accept the people God has put in their lives, because they want them to conform to the way they want them to be. Just as there’s no one else like you, there’s no one else like your husband, or your mother in law. But until the day you accept the people whom you will never be able to change, you’re going to have a miserable, frustrated existence.
3. GOD ACCEPTS YOU just like you are. And thank the Lord for that! Think about yourself for a moment…your weaknesses, the mistakes you’ve made in life, your failures. God doesn’t reject you because you’re not perfect. What’s more, He wants us to give Him our mistakes…the Bible calls them “sins.” There are people who reject the opportunity for happiness and peace, because they won’t accept themselves. They won’t admit they’re weak, incapable of changing themselves. God’s not that way. God accepts us, just like we are…sinners, undeserving of happiness or of a home in Heaven. But until we accept ourselves, just like we are, sinners, we’ll never be able to change our relationship with God.
4. ACCEPT THE LORD JESUS CHRIST. He accepts you. But that is of no value to you until YOU accept HIM as your Savior. God accepts you just like you are…weak…incapable of saving yourself. But you have to accept that fact, surrender to Him, realizing that without Him you can’t go to Heaven. Not by works that you might do will you ever go to Heaven when you die, but by what He did on the cross for you, dying in your place for your sins. He’s the only One who can change you. You don’t like yourself? Have you tried everything and failed? Of course, you’ve failed, because you can’t change yourself. Just as we have to accept situations in our lives, we must accept ourselves just as we are, just like God sees us: SINNERS, without hope of ever changing ourselves. But God can change you, if you accept Him as your SAVIOR. He made you one of a kind…that’s how special you are to Him!

Chapter 10 - "When You Can't Be There"

2011-07-21T13:15:00.002-05:00

My first clue that something was wrong should have been the voice at the other end of the line: “Hi, Mom.”

Jolene Sloan and I are different in many ways…she’s tall and slender, and beautiful and talented, and very creative. But we’re alike in one way: we don’t do phone calls. Except for birthdays, I never call my children.

And that’s what alerted me that beautiful Spring morning…which was late evening in Ukraine where David and Jolene are missionaries. I was visiting in the home of my children, Joel and Margaret, and their two little girls. What a perfect retreat for a writer, and grandmother! Several years ago they built a little guest apartment behind their house on the New Mexico desert, and it is close enough to feel like I’m spending time with my children, but private enough to provide peace and quiet.

There’s a lovely porch that my son, Tommy built a couple of years ago. So when I answered my cell phone, I walked outside not only to get a better connection with the other continent, but also to enjoy the beautiful fresh air and sunshine.

“Mom, I need you to pray for David. He’s very sick. He hasn’t been able to eat for several days. We know you can’t do anything, being so far away, but he wanted me to call you and ask you to pray for him.”

My mother heart sank. For Jolene to call me was major, and for a few seconds I panicked. Now, my son is already in his 30’s. He has a very intelligent wife, super capable of caring for her sick husband, their four children, juggling home schooling with housework, (which can sometimes mean doing without electricity and running water, staying warm by a little portable chimney), is expert in walking out of their village to the highway with four little ones in tow, and catching a bus into town, (they don’t have a vehicle of their own) and she is fluent in Russian. What on earth could I possibly have done had I been there?

Well, apart from making a pot of my potato soup, and spoon-feeding him, nothing.

Or was there something I could do?

What can you do when you can’t be with your children?

I remember when our 8 children were still home…half of them were already teenagers… lying in bed one night and thinking, “What am I going to do when my children leave home for college? What’s it going to be like, lying in bed not knowing if they’re sick, or lost, or hungry? What am I going to do if they call and need me? What am I going to do, how am I going to feel, how am I going to cope when I can’t be there?”

That beautiful morning, standing out on the porch, there was absolutely nothing I could do for David.

Or was there?...

In my helplessness, actually there were several things that I was able to do:

1. As soon as Jolene hung up, I went back into my little apartment, alone, and wept. “God, why are you doing this? What possible purpose could there be in this senselessness? How is Jolene going to cope? How must she feel right now? What did I do wrong? Where did I fail them? What if he dies?...” Those are all the thoughts that ran through my mind…and many, many more. I’d like to tell you that the first thing I did was to fall on my knees, and commit him to the Lord. But I’m like you, if you’re a mother! I despaired. But only for a few minutes. Despair is all right, because we’re human. Don’t look back over times like this and beat yourself over the head because you despaired. That’s human, and especially mother-human. That’s your mother instinct kicking in, and it’s part of our job description. Let the grief, the despair, the questions, do their job. I sometimes think God allows these feelings of helplessness to overwhelm us, so we can be just that…helpless. Sometimes He wants us to totally rely on Him, and just find comfort in the shelter of His arms. I remember one time many, many years ago…We lived in a little village, and I don’t know the nature of my despair, but I had done everything I could do…probably had to do with the discipline of one of my children, who were all four very, very little at that time. I put them down for their nap, and lay down totally exhausted. And just as real as I used to feel Daddy’s arms around me, I sensed the Lord enfolding me in his arms, and whispering, “It’s all right…I have everything under control. You just take a nice long nap, and when you wake up, you’ll feel better.” What precious comfort! He wasn’t angry with me because I had despaired. That’s where He wanted me. That’s the only place I could have been, in order for Him to have comforted me. The “all-things-working-together-for-good” meaning to this senselessness will make perfect sense some day. Don’t beat yourself over the head for being a Mom.

2. I was able to pray, and to commit David and Jolene into His care. I don’t think I really believed in the power of prayer until this year. But I’ve seen too many answered prayers not to know that God answers prayer. I’ve probably prayed more this year than I ever have. I pray while I’m driving, while I’m walking to my gate at the airport, while I’m shopping, in the shower, while I do my hair, and so for me to incorporate it into that Spring morning was pretty natural. I prayed through my tears that morning, but sometimes I also pray while I’m happy. I don’t know if I lack the discipline required to spend an hour on my knees, or if I have the need to be busy while I pray, but I find it much easier to pray while I’m doing something mechanical, routine, that doesn’t require a lot of brain activity. I pray for my children all day long, when I take bathroom breaks from my e-mailing, when I run across the drive from church to leave my Sunday school things in my room. I pray for special Birthday friends I know, and for a friend who is in surgery. I pray for a couple who is having marital problems, and for a mother who has deserted her four children. Praying is as much a part of my life as breathing or brushing my teeth. It also keeps my mind occupied with positive activity, instead of worrying, or having a critical spirit. Praying keeps me out of trouble, and keeps me focused.

3. I shared my burden with others. I’m not a phone caller, but I am an e-mailer, so I sat down at my computer and wrote to two dear friends who have prayer chains in their churches; one is a pastor’s wife, and the other a church secretary. By the next evening, David was able to go to church, and teach his Institute classes. When you can’t be there, share your burden with friends. A word of caution: I know there are burdens too private to share. Don’t ever share private burdens that would expose the personal lives of others. They usually have a way of revealing themselves sooner or later, but don’t you do the exposing. That could cause more harm than good. Ask yourself, “By sharing this prayer request, will I have to answer questions stirred up by curiosity?” Don’t set yourself up to have to cover up things that shouldn’t be exposed. While I believe in sharing one another’s burdens, and I believe in the power of prayer, sharing with others shouldn’t turn into gossiping. I have a ladies’ prayer meeting every week, and I’m always careful to make sure these “prayer request” times don’t turn into gossip sessions.

4. Keep serving the Lord as if your prayer were already answered. It’s so hard to “move the body” when our hearts are burdened. It’s hard to keep the right focus, the right spirit. Our mother nature wants to crawl in bed and pull the cover over our head, and soak ourselves in worry. I’ve learned something these past few months: I’m learning to enjoy what God has given me at the moment. For example, if I’m worrying and fretting over David and Jolene, I can’t be a blessing to Joel and Margaret. If I carry around my burden, not only am I not helping David and Jolene, I’m no fun to be around. I’ll look back over the precious time with Joel and Margaret, and regret not enjoying the time I could have spent with them. That’s where trust and faith come in. If I’ve prayed, and cast my burden on the Lord, and shared it with others, I can serve the Lord more effectively, and I can be a blessing to those nearest me.

5. Right now, I’m going through a very difficult time with a relationship with someone I love very, very much. I’ve been hurt, and I fear I’ve hurt someone unknowingly. I have to commit that hurt to the Lord many times a day, and not let that spill over onto my relationship with others, or into my ministry. I’m trying to let that hurt teach me lessons I’d never thought of before. And in turn, I’m teaching those lessons to others. That’s what I’m doing right now. The times in my children’s lives when they were going through difficult times, and I couldn’t be there have taught me something, and I’m sharing those lessons learned with you. You don’t have to be a writer or a teacher to share things you’ve learned in life’s experiences. Keep a journal with your Bible, and after your Bible reading every morning, jot down things you learned the day before. You’d be surprised how many lessons life teaches us just by simply living. “Don’t interfere with God’s plan,” is a good one. If you can’t be with your children, it’s probably part of God’s plan…your little one is in surgery; that’s a toughie; you’re a single Mom, and it’s your ex’s turn to have your daughter this weekend. WOW!! You could teach me something there! What did you learn about letting her go? You can’t be there on the first day of school…or you shouldn’t be there. What about leaving that newborn in the nursery your first time back at church? I’ve been there, sister.

And I’m a survivor. And you can be, too!

June 2011 Prayer Letter

2011-06-30T15:28:00.000-05:00

Dear Friends,

It was with much emotion that afternoon that I got my first glimpse in six months of my little mountain valley home of San Cristóbal. There is absolutely no joy like the joy of being back home. So many things have happened. When one leaves their home for such a long time, changes are inevitable, some good, and some bad. Little did I know that before my return my daughter in law, Liz would undergo major surgery. But she did on April 12, and thanks to your prayers for her, she has recovered, and it is affirmed that the tumor removed from her kidney was benign. Erica, a little girl who was dying of cancer, was a special guest at our banquet in November. She and her Dad were saved that night, and while I was gone, Erica went to Heaven.

In April, I continued to travel with Ulises and Elizabeth until their return to Chiapas the first of May. What a delight it was for me to meet scores of precious pastors and their families, and their ladies who seem to really love me. They showed me so many expressions of love, I often feel like Corrie Ten Boom, when she received honors. She would return to her room, get down on her knees, and say to the Lord, “All the honors given to me tonight, I offer them to back to You.”

In the month of May, I traveled from Texas to New Mexico. I gave my testimony five different times, and showed the DVD presentation of my Banquet ministry, taught three times, and spoke at five ladies’ banquets. My already full prayer book is now bulging with names of new friends, and their many needs. I’m happily settling back into my routine of teaching ladies in the Bible Institute here, teaching our ladies’ Sunday school class, helping with the music, and speaking at our monthly ladies’ prayer breakfast. We are now getting ready for Vacation Bible School July 11-15.

Ulises and Elizabeth had their first service in a house they were able to rent on June 19. It was my joy to get to attend last Sunday, and it was one of the most emotional experiences of my life. Thank you to all of you who have supported them financially, as well as with your prayers.

The church here has signed the papers on the land where we plan to soon start construction on our church. For 27 years it has been right across the drive from my house, and it will seem strange to drive to church. But I rejoice that Philip is leading the work here forward.

Thank you for your friendship, and faithful prayers and financial support.

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

Between You and Me... Weariness (Part 6)

2011-06-28T15:00:00.007-05:00

“Well-Doing Without Weariness”

“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.”
Galatians 6:9

The very nature of the role of a woman is to serve. We serve almost from the time we get up in the morning, until we fall into bed at night. We serve everything from breakfast to customers. We’re on call 24/7 when it comes to serving our little ones.

There are so many examples of servants in the Bible. Even if we look only at women, there’s Sarah, and Abigail, and Esther, who served her people, and Ruth, who served her mother in law. And the most famous of all women servants, “Martha, Martha.”

The Master of all servants was our Lord Jesus Christ. Of all the people who have ever lived on earth, Jesus had the most logical right to be served. But He came as a servant. The central theme of the Bible is the Servant of all—Jesus Christ. “For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give His life a ransom for many” Mark 10:45; Phil. 2:7 Jesus Christ “…took upon him the form of a servant,”

But let me tell you a way to better serve others: it’s called “Rest,” or “Well-Doing Without Weariness.”

Would you fall asleep if you were to close your eyes right now for 5 minutes? We’re women, and we’re tired. We get up tired; we go to bed tired; we even die tired. Maybe that’s where the expression, “May she rest in peace,” comes from. We try to eat right, and get enough sleep, even if it has to be in the afternoons when our little ones nap. But we’re tired, in body and in spirit.

I must get my rest. I am avid fan of siestas, probably because I’ve spent most of my life in México. I try to take afternoon naps, especially Sunday afternoons. A pastor once said the acrostic of the word SAINT is Sunday Afternoon Is Nap Time. And I agree with him.

I want to tell you how to rest.

I Physical Rest
A. Get organized. I Corinthians 14:40 “Let all things be done decently and in order.” Even as a widow, I must organize my life, my time. We pride ourselves in being able to multi-task. But I find that if I can just concentrate on one thing at a time, not only do I feel less stress, but I do a better job, and enjoy my work more.
B. Get sleep. “It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep. Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord:” Psalm 127:2b, 3a I think it’s so significant that a promise for sleep comes right before the assurance that children are a blessing. That verse must surely have been written for mothers who are up all night with little ones. So much could be said in favor of sleep. Are you tempted to eat when you’re not hungry? Go take a nap. Probably the only time we’re not sinning is when we’re sleeping.
C. Get apart. Mark 6:31 “And he said unto them, (His apostles) Come ye yourselves apart into a desert place, and rest a while: for there were many coming and going, and they had no leisure, so much as to eat.” Do you know what had just happened in the verses before Jesus said this to His disciples? John the Baptist was beheaded. Don’t you think Jesus was grieving? No man born of woman was greater than John, according to Jesus. He knew how important it was, even for the Son of God, to get physical rest when going through an emotionally stressful time. It’s hard to separate physical-emotional-spiritual. If Jesus needed time alone with His apostles, we surely need time alone with our family.

II. Spiritual Rest
A. Wait. Isaiah 40:31 “But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles: they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” We need God’s presence. In Exodus 33:12-14, Moses was tired. You can hear the exasperation in his voice as though he were angry with God. If God hadn’t realized that Moses was tired, he would have reprimanded him. And instead of telling him to have someone stretch out a hammock for him, and bring him a glass of lemonade, He said, “My presence will go with thee, and I will give thee rest.” He needed God’s presence. Sometimes we’re tired, and we don’t even know it. Fatigue makes us irritable. “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.” Proverbs 17:22 No one wants to be around an old woman with squeaky bones. Spend time with God, or no one will want to spend time with you.
B. Work. Hebrews 4:11 “Let us labour therefore to enter into that rest,” would seem like a contradiction of terms. If you serve others, as if you were serving the Lord, your attitude toward work will change. For the last three years of my husband’s life, he had to have round-the-clock care. He was my ministry. I got very tired, but when I began to look at my care for him, and to do my tasks “as unto the Lord,” my attitude changed, and his comfort became my focus.
C. Walk with God. “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30 A yoke is not for just one animal. It’s an implement that enables two animals to work in harmony, to walk together. Jesus and me. He tells us to TAKE His yoke upon us, but He also asks us to CAST our care upon Him. I Peter 5:7 “Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” Did you know sometimes burdens can wear you out? You’re serving, but wearily. When you TAKE His yoke upon you, “Lord, I accept my work, my responsibility, my tasks,” and walk with Him, you can CAST all your care upon Him. You have no business carrying around your cares and your burdens. He wants them.

“I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep; for thou, Lord, only makest me dwell in safety.”
Psalm 4:8

April 2011 Prayer Letter

2011-04-29T16:16:00.003-05:00

Dear Friends,

The words to my life verse, “The Lord is good, a strong hold in the day of trouble;” have never been so dear to me as they were early Monday morning, when a tornado swept through the town where my daughter, Elizabeth, and her husband, Ulises and their two children and I were staying. Not only are we thankful to be alive, but are reassured that God has a work for us to do.

Ulises was able to obtain his visa to the USA, and we’ve been traveling together since February, visiting churches, presenting their ministries. I’m so thankful for the kindness of pastors, both English-speaking and Spanish, who have opened their churches and hearts to them. Beacon Hill Baptist Church gave them a 2001 15-passenger Van, which will be used in their ministry. They return to Chiapas May 2, and have plans to open a new work in Ixtapa, the same little village where Tom and I moved with our three little boys 37 years ago. It is their dream to buy property, and start a church and orphanage there. I never cease to be amazed at their faith in knowing God is going to provide the money for the property, just as He provided the Van. This will be the third church they will have started, since the beginning of their ministry two years ago. During the two months Ulises has been in the States, men who he won to the Lord and trained, have been preaching, knocking doors, carrying on the hospital ministry, and souls have been saved, and new families are attending. I feel like I’m being very objective when I say, “Ulises and Elizabeth Martínez are doing an amazing work, and are worthy of your prayers and support.”

It has been my honor to have spoken in several ladies’ conferences the past few weeks, and also it was my joy to have given my testimony several times upon the pastors’ requests, like in Faith Baptist Church in Illinois, Pastor Terry Anglea, and also in their Spanish church. I had a wonderful time, also, speaking in First Calvary Baptist Church in Sanderson, TX, Pastor Paul Ray; Amistad Baptist Church, Del Rio, TX, pastor Corders; a new experience teaching the ladies of Pastor Esteban Rentería’s bilingual church in New Mexico in Spanish and in English…at the same time! Then on to Albuquerque, where I taught the ladies in New Heights Baptist Church in Spanish. Lord willing, I will be returning there in May for a ladies’ banquet. My journeys have taken me to Kentucky, where I spoke in a two-day conference to the precious ladies of Greater Cumberland Baptist Church, many of those young military wives. It was my joy to have been a guest in the home of Pastor and Mrs. Ken Shaver. It was during the Sunday morning service, where Pastor Shaver presented three flags to three of their military people who were present, that the Lord laid on my heart to invite the military wives who live on the army base in our town in San Cristóbal, to be honored guests at our November 18 Ladies’ Christmas banquet this year.

The drive to the Los Angeles area was a long one, but worth every mile, as I was privileged to speak to over a thousand ladies under a big tent in Pastor Ezekiel Salazar’s annual Latin American ladies’ conference. After a ladies’ banquet April 29, and three more appointments in New Mexico in May, I get to return home to Chiapas, where I left my heart five months ago.

Thank you for your prayers for my daughter in law, Liz. Earlier today my son, Philip, called from her hospital room in Chiapas, to report that she was awake, but weak and pale after her four-hour surgery for the removal of a tumor from her right kidney. Further studies are being made, but they are quite sure it is not malignant, and we’re thankful they did not have to remove her kidney. I admire my son for being brave enough to be present during her surgery.

Life wouldn’t be normal, though, without its tears, and the past few weeks I have shed many. I’m so thankful for my son, David and Jolene, and for their faithfulness to serve the Lord in Ukraine. But part of my heart left with them as we said good bye over the phone on March 15, and they departed NYC for their beloved Ukraine. I miss them and their four precious children, including my newest grandson at that time.

But today, April 14, baby Caleb Philip Miller was born to Steve and Ruthie, bringing the total to 34 grand-treasures for this proud Mimi. This is a furlough baby, and I know he will adapt to life on the mission field when they return to Querétaro in August, just as little Micah is to Ukraine.

More and more tears over the home going of three very, very special people in my life:
Mrs. Colleen Bond, beloved wife of Pastor WN Bond, my husband’s former pastor, went to Heaven Sunday night, April 3, while her husband was preaching. I’m told that when he received the news, he shouted from the pulpit, “Praise the Lord! She’s not suffering any more!” But I know the grief is there, and I share it with you, Bro. Bond.

My precious friend, Mrs. Cheryl Ager, is now home with the Lord, as of last Friday, April 8. She amazed us all when she had a liver transplant several years ago. It was my joy to have spent a Sunday afternoon with her in December, 2010, and she assured me that she was ready to go Home whenever the Lord wanted to take her.

Pastor Mark Gondran, who pastored Temple Baptist Church in New Iberia, LA isn’t suffering any more from cancer. He went to Heaven yesterday evening. “We’ll miss you, Pastor, and our prayers are with your beloved Sherena, Casey and Callen, and the faithful people you loved and pastored.”

May the Lord find me faithful, as my three precious friends who are in Heaven today.

Your friend,
Mrs. Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

My Newest Grand"Treasure"

2011-04-19T14:39:00.005-05:00

Caleb Philip Miller

Born to Steve and Ruth Miller

Thursday, April 14 at 2:45 PM
7 pounds, 19 1/2 inches long

To see more pictures of my newest grand"treasure," go here!

Jason and Sarah's beautiful children

2011-04-12T07:40:00.002-05:00

Sarah, my oldest daughter, and her husband Jason serve the Lord in Vera Cruz, Mexico. These are their children: Aren't they beautiful?!

Between You and Me... Rebellion (Part 5)

2011-04-08T12:06:00.004-05:00

“…for Esther did the commandment of Mordecai, like as when she was brought up with him.” Esther 2:20

Esther became the queen of Persia. Hers is a well-known story. She’s a heroine of the Jewish people even today, because she saved the lives of thousands of Jews in her day. Every year the Jews read the book of Esther.

But there’s a seldom-mentioned virtue that Esther possessed that we can use as an example for our lives. It wasn’t her bravery; it wasn’t her beauty or the way she conducted herself among the other palace damsels that won their love and confidence. At least for me, her most noble virtue was her submission. The Bible says, she “did the commandment of Mordecai, like as when she was brought up with him.” This suggests that she was accustomed to obeying her cousin, Mordecai. So when he sent for her to do something that would ultimately help her people, although perhaps she didn’t understand why, since she was accustomed to obeying him, she did it.

She could have thought, “Who does my cousin think he is, anyway? I’m not a little girl any more like I was when he raised me. I’m the queen of Persia. The king is the only one who can tell me what to do, and if I have my way, one of these days he’ll obey me.” How different this story would be if she would have had that attitude.

The word “submission” comes from the verb “to submit.” The Bible uses that word in Ephesians 5:22: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands,…”

Let me give you my own definition: “To give your will to someone else; to give the reins to someone else; to surrender.”

God has a perfect order in His plan for the home:

1. Christ

2. Husband

3. Wife

4. Children

When a family lives according to this order, everything is fine. This is the way they live:

1. Husband submits to Christ

2. Wife submits to husband

3. Children submit to parents

It’s when one member of the family changes that order that there are problems; divorce, rebellious children…

If the husband doesn’t submit himself to Christ, there is disorder in the home. Or the husband may follow the Lord completely, but if his wife rebels against the husband, not only is she rebelling against her husband, but she also lives in rebellion toward God. It may be that the parents are submitted to the Lord, and the wife is in subjection to her husband, but if the children are not in subjection to the parents, they are living in rebellion toward God as well as toward their parents.

Needless to say, there is total chaos in a home where all members of the family live in rebellion against their authority.

I believe with all my heart that even though the husband and father is not in submission to God, and even though the children are living in rebellion, if only one member of the family…the wife…will submit herself to her authority…her husband…there is hope for that home…for that marriage.

Jesus Himself gave up His own will to God: “Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.” Ephesians 5:2

Up until here, we’re all in agreement, because I’ve showed you this plan from the Bible.

But the Bible also says, “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.” Eph. 5:21

I don’t have a husband. The Bible doesn’t give instructions to widows or single ladies concerning submission. But it’s my opinion that every female should have a male authority in her life. By nature we women are followers. Woman is follower…Man is leader, whether it be in the home, in the church, or in the nation. God has put man in positions of leadership.

Now, I agree that there are women to whom God has given the talent of organizing, planning, and leading. But my personal conviction is that she should develop that gift starting in her home with her children, because according to God’s order, she is their authority.

Also in the church, a lot of times we see ladies with organizational talents, and who are great to motivate others to use their talents. But this gift of leading should be with ladies, single ladies, and with children, not with men, or even young teenage men.

I would like to say something on behalf of pastors’ wives: many times we see her as “co-pastor.” In other words, we expect her to do things that we would never expect of another lady in the church. “She should teach, organize, direct, and plan. She should be the director of Vacation Bible School, and organize picnics for the Christian School. She should counsel young ladies, and sing in the choir, etc., etc., etc.” Hey, where does it say that in the Bible? The only plan for your pastor’s wife is the same plan that God puts in His Word for you…to be wife and mother, and everything involved in being wife and mother. The only time the pastor’s wife should be involved in the activities of the church is when her husband asks her to.

But back to our lesson: every woman should have an authority, a man in her life who…excuse the profanity…commands her.

So, should a 67 year-old widow be under the authority of a man? Yes.

Should a 67 year-old widow follow the command of a man? Yes.

“Oh, sure, that’s easy for you to say, because you don’t have a husband. You can come and go as you like. You can shop and eat out when you feel like it. You can get up as late as you like.” If you only knew…

…Sometimes my daughters ask me, “Mom, would you ever re-marry?” And my answer is: “Of course not. I don’t want anyone telling me what to do!”

I say that with a smile, because the truth is, I have more “bosses” now that I’m a widow, than I did when my husband was here. I’ll live and die, and never understand a woman who complains about having to submit to her husband. How foolish! How simple your life is, so uncomplicated! Thank the Lord every day for a husband with sufficient character of leadership who will tell you what you should do.

When my husband was alive, my only obligation was to obey him, to please him, and to serve him. Looking back at the order of the home, when I was submissive to him, I was in subjection to the Lord, and everything went smoothly. My children were happier, my husband was happier, and I was happier. Even our ministry progressed when I gave the reins to my husband.

When my husband went to Heaven, that Sunday afternoon, my authority also left. But surprisingly, instead of feeling relieved, instead of a “now I’m the mistress of my time, of my talents, of my money,” quite the contrary…I felt like a little lost lamb. But I thank the Lord that my four sons and my four sons in law took his place. I’m thankful for the direction of my three brothers. My pastor was an enormous blessing. That’s why I’m writing this lesson, that’s why I’ve written a book. Immediately after my authority left, God put men in my path with enough wisdom to guide my steps, to advise me…men who have taken me out of unsure paths, and helped me make decisions, they’ve put my feet on solid ground, and I can be no less than grateful to God for them.

Sometimes I travel with one of my children, and when I do, I have to submit my will to that of the head of the family, whether it is my son or my son in law. I hear you: “I would never obey my son in law.” Well, then don’t expect your daughter to obey him.

“Oh, sure, your sons are pastors, but I would never submit to my son.” Then don’t expect your daughter in law to submit to him. And by the way, don’t expect your grandchildren to submit to their parents, either.

To me, there is nothing more repulsive than an older woman, who thinks she knows everything, and tells everyone what to do. She bosses everyone to do everything she wants them to do, and sends them anywhere she wants them to go. Don’t take advantage of your age. That’s why there are old people in nursing homes. Their children put them there because they’ve bossed them around all their lives. No one they can boss around there.

The devil is very sly in showing us all the negative aspects of submission. But at least for me, there are many positive things to being submissive:

1. Submission provides security and protection. When a woman places herself under the authority of another, she has fewer decisions to make. When she knows there’s a man who is guiding her steps she feels more secure.

2. There’s nothing more feminine than a submissive woman. It shows her vulnerability. But at the same time, it shows her character, not her weakness. Many women fear turning over the reins to a man because it shows a lack of strength. Quite the contrary, it takes more character to submit than to rebel.

3. When a woman submits herself to her authority, she allows God to bless her, her husband, her children, and her ministry. She opens the way for the blessings of God to shower on her marriage and on her home.

4. The opposite of submission is rebellion. Rebellion hinders God from answering prayers. Maybe if God isn’t answering your prayers, it’s because you’re not submitting to your authority. “For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft,” I Samuel 15:23 I would never want anyone to call me a witch, but I classify myself when I’m rebellious.

5. Submission brings peace and joy, and good health. Many women suffer physical problems, as well as emotional problems because they live in rebellion.

6. Just as in Esther’s life, submission is for your good, and for the good of others.

Give the reins to your husband, if you’re married. If you’re a widow, or single, submit your will to those who represent your authority.

Whatever your role in life, submit yourself to Christ, Who “hath given himself for us.”

Between You and Me... Fear! (Part 4)

2011-04-07T14:16:00.005-05:00

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear:” I John 4:18

Before my husband went to Heaven six years and three months ago, I longed for there to be nothing between him and me. Now that I’m a widow, I’ve discovered some new goals for the relationships he left me with. I want nothing to stand between the Lord and me. I find myself constantly striving to “keep the way clear.”

In a marriage relationship, however, sometimes the problem doesn’t lie only with one partner. Sometimes both husband and wife cause divisions, and spaces between the two of them. Once I became a widow, I realized that concerning my relationship with others, most of the time I was to blame for conflicts between myself and others.

Not so with the Lord: if there’s ever anything hindering our closeness, it lies 100% on my side. That’s what my life is all about: being aware of things that hinder that closeness that I desire with the Lord, and finding out how to remove them.

When I prepare my lessons, I always try to analyze my life, and find out why I’m not perfectly content and happy. Usually at the root of all my anxieties lies that little enemy called fear.

I tried to list all the things that have made me fearful these past few weeks, and I came up with this. I have feared:

1. Not being able to complete deadlines

2. Not being able to e-mail

3. A serious illness in the spouse of one of my children.

4. Everything involved with the birth of my grandson.

5. Driving in the dark during a tornado.

6. My children having to travel on through a snow storm.

7. My having to drive through the aftermath of a snow storm.

8. The miscarriage of my daughter.

9. My children’s travels near the Mexican-American borders, and in other war-torn parts of the world.

10. Having to drive through a dark neighborhood to an empty house.

And that’s not even half of the list.

I’ve come up with this discovery: Fear leads to worry. Worry leads to doubt. Doubt leads to indecision. Indecision leads to confusion. Confusion leads to insecurity. Insecurity leads to complaining. Complaining affects others, and harms my influence and testimony. But most of all, it shows my lack of confidence in the Lord, and therefore harms our relationship.

Every mother has experienced fears involving her child. Fear even before his birth, that something could go wrong during delivery; fear that he may not be responding to certain stimuli; fear he isn’t gaining weight; fear he’s overweight; fear he won’t pass his finals; fear of choosing the wrong spouse…and on and on it goes.

I may not have the perfect solution for your fears, but I believe with the help of the Bible, we can lay down a few principles.

1. Tell it to Jesus. When you’re afraid, talk with the Lord, and tell Him openly how you feel. I don’t have a husband to talk to, and because of that I find myself talking to the Lord. I tell Him all my negative feelings. I tell Him when I’m sad and lonely. I tell Him when I’m upset. I tell Him when I’m confused. And I tell Him my fears and my anxieties.

2. Cast your care on Him. Unless you give Him those fears, and those anxieties, no amount of talking with Him will help. I don’t seem to have much trouble talking with the Lord. But “casting” is a lot harder than “talking.” “Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” I Peter 5:7

3. Keep a happy heart. There’s a verse I read this morning in Proverbs 15:13: “A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance:” and then in chapter 17:22: “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.” You may not be able to change the circumstances that cause your fears, but did you know you can keep a happy heart? I remember many years ago, my father was in Houston undergoing the agony of chemotherapy. I know he was suffering, and sick. But I rarely walked into his room that he wasn’t laughing, and making those around him laugh. I treasure many hilarious stories that mother told me of things he did when I wasn’t there. And I often wondered how many people ever laughed on that particular floor of the hospital. I’m convinced that his “merry heart” kept him around longer than he was expected to live. And I never once remember his being afraid. Did you know it’s hard to be afraid, and have happy thoughts at the same time? If you will keep a positive attitude, it will help you to overcome your fears. Several years ago, I flew to Ukraine. During my visit there, I made a trip to another country with my son, David. We had to stay in a hotel in Istanbul on our way over. As we drove through the dark streets around midnight, fear gripped my heart. I tried turning my thoughts to the happy special time I would have with my son once we reached our destination, and that was such a soothing feeling. And although we were in dangerous places during that time, which bring fear to my heart, even as I write, I will treasure forever the memories mother and son made together which will provide a lifetime of happiness for me.

4. Keep a sound mind. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” II Timothy 1:7 That verse alone should bring us the assurance that the devil brings fear. When we fear, we don’t think straight, and we tend to make wrong decisions. God’s ways always bring peace, and clarity of thoughts.

5. Fear is a fact of life. That’s why the Psalmist wrote, “What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee.” (Psalm 56:3) You’re not the only one who has ever been afraid. When David wrote these words, he had either once been afraid, or he knew he would one day be afraid of something.

6. Fear is fine…sometimes. If I’m afraid of having a heart attach, I’ll lose weight. If I’m afraid of contracting cancer, I’ll have my yearly checkups, and watch my diet. If I’m afraid of losing my child to drugs, I’ll train him up right, and surround him with positive influences. If I’m afraid of divorce, I’ll keep my thoughts and my heart clean and pure. If I were afraid of going to hell, I’d accept Jesus as my Savior.

But I already have, and no matter what rational fears I may have, no matter what awaits me in this life that now causes me to fear, I know that someday I’m going to Heaven.

So maybe some of the things I fear will one day come to pass. But the comforting thought that “none of these things” can move me, is the one thing that brings me peace and joy, and calms my fears.

Chapter 9 - "Did I Miss It?"

2011-04-06T07:04:00.004-05:00

(I wrote this chapter several weeks ago, and even as I sit here, David and Jolene are at the airport in a distant city. In one hour and 15 minutes, they will be flying back to their field of service. I dedicate this to them, and to all the David’s and their moms.)

I watched carefully the Van ahead of me, because David, my son was driving. He and his family were en route to the airport, from where he would be flying abroad in a few hours. As I drove along, tears filled my eyes: I would soon be separated from my son, not only for the next ten days, but from him, Jolene, and my four grandchildren, as they would soon be returning to their mission field. Two years will then separate us.

And I wondered…did I miss it? Did I miss the fun times we’ve had together? Did I miss your smile, and the way you walk, and the look in your eyes as you hold your newborn son?

Am I too busy with my own thoughts of how I’m going to meet deadlines, and make reservations, to notice how smart you are? Will I look back and wonder what was the punch line of the joke you told me Thursday?

Did I miss the meaning of your coming into my room before daylight every morning while I was reading my Bible, like you did when you were a little boy? Or will I remember my mind wandering to the list of things to do while you were sharing your plans of the day with me?

Did I miss it? Did I miss your grin when I sped out of the hotel parking lot, when I was supposed to be following you? And your call, “Mom, we’re still at the hotel.” Did I miss the humor of the moment, or being annoyed because I messed up our travel plans? The joy of the moment is what I have learned to be thankful for.

The joy of knowing you’re on your way to a challenging adventure…not the worrying about your safety and protection. I’ll cast that on the Lord, and just think of your desire to serve Him.

I’ll bask in the joy of knowing the supreme sacrifice you’re making to be away from your family. I’ll feel, at the same time, pride and peace.

I won’t miss it any more, from this day forward. I’ll put aside my fears, and my doubts, and my computer, and my phone, and learn to bask in the sunshine, and feel the coziness of being snowed in.

I’ll not complain about things like electronics, and delayed flights, and missed appointments. I’ll condition myself to just enjoy leisurely long afternoon naps, and dessert and coffee, and noisy grandbabies.

I won’t miss it anymore. Who cares that I never get online ever again, if I can keep the lines of communication open between you and me. I’ll not miss the honor of being your mother, and the peace of knowing that you can share your burdens as well as your plans for the future. I’ll not miss that anymore.

It may be too late to bring back lost joys. It may be too long to remember the story you told me while I was concentrating on my shopping list.

But there’s today. And this evening when you call me to tell me, “Mom, I’m fixing to board my plane,” I’ll take off my glasses so I can see your face across the miles, and imagine your smile and your excitement as you once again embark on another adventure, serving the Lord.

I don’t know what the future holds. But I want to share the dream you’re dreaming now, of souls you’re dreaming will be saved.

I’ll miss you these next few days, and after that the next two years.

But I won’t ever again miss the moments we share, and I’ll read over and over your e-mails, and your articles, and I’ll hold on to your words.

Your little-boy-days are gone, and I wonder, “Did I miss it? Your jeans got washed, but did I notice the domino-stacks of old cassette tapes you’d line up around the legs of the dining table, down the hall, and then topple the first one over to watch them fall for miles in your imagination?

Like the toppling tapes, that’s how swiftly those little-boy years have gone by. You don’t dream about toy cars any more. Your dreams hold a more significant meaning: the destiny of souls.

So although I’ll miss you, and Jolene, and the babies, I’ll not miss remembering all the precious memories we’ve made together these past four months, and those that are still in the making.

I miss you and love you more than life.

Mom, Nahum 1:7

February 2011 Prayer Letter

2011-04-04T11:52:00.003-05:00

Written in February, but just now being posted by Jolene, who gave birth to her 4th baby January 26th and is, only now, catching up with her to do list!

Dear Friends of México,

How exciting to look outside my window, and see snow! It reminds me of two things: my sins, which are forgiven, and how far away I am from the warmer climate of my beloved home in Chiapas.

As I sit here, I have burdens: the spouse of one of my children, who has been in for a biopsy this morning, possibly has cancer. Another is traveling on dangerous freeways after an ice storm last night. A daughter is recuperating from the sorrow of a miscarriage, and loss of a much-prayed-for baby. But the joy outweighs the burden, as I rest content in knowing that all three of these families are serving the Lord exactly where they should be. What a joy to hear another son last night on the phone, “Mom, we’re exactly in the center of God’s will.” There truly is “no greater joy.”

In case you haven’t heard, I’m proud to announce the arrival of little Micah James Sloan, born to David and Jolene on Wednesday, January 26. Although he only weighed 6 pounds, he’s healthy and as perfect as any little sinner can be. As I watched this little one come into the world, I prayed that one day we would also be celebrating his 2nd birth, like we did for three of my grandchildren during the past two months: Gaby, Andrew, and Sophie.

Although I have left my ladies’ ministries in Chiapas for a few months, they continue thriving through the faithful ministry of my daughter in law, Liz. I am getting very wonderful reports from home about the things the ladies are learning, not only through her teaching of the book of James, but also from the very practical applications she is having them carry out. Last week she held our monthly ladies’ prayer breakfast, and she had a record attendance of thirty. Eight widows were honored, including a former mayor’s daughter whose father served during the ‘40’s.

Well, this is a prayer letter, so I ask your prayers for my safety during the next few months, as I travel to Louisiana, Texas, New Mexico, and California, speaking to ladies’ meetings in different churches, some in Spanish, and others in English. Most of these will be road trips, which I thoroughly enjoy. It gives me time alone with the Lord. Pray also that I will be a blessing to these precious ladies wherever I go. Thank you, Pastors, who have invited me. Thank you, also to my sons who have called pastors for me, and set up the appointments. I want to be a blessing to your ladies.

You certainly are a blessing to me.

Your friend,
Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

Between You and Me / All These Things

2011-04-03T14:52:00.007-05:00

Written January 25th, but just now being posted by Jolene, who gave birth to her 4th baby January 26th and is, only now, catching up with her to do list!

“But seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33

There are two occasions in my life when I realize how many things I possess: when I move, and when I travel. There is that tearing-myself-away feeling I have every time I pack for a trip. It’s only when I try closing my suitcase that I realize of “all these things,” something is going to have to stay.

Have you ever thought what you would grab if suddenly your house caught fire, or as in our case, you were to be in an earthquake? If you’re a young mother, your baby would be at the top of your grab list, I’m sure. But what about me? My purse would go with me, and then my Bible, probably in that order, I’m ashamed to say.

In fact, I’ve often wondered what I would do if someone stole my purse, or if I were to leave it in a public restroom. I don’t even want to think of the consequences of my neglect: my passport, my FM3 credential, not to mention drivers’ license, credit cards and debit cards. It’s quite a shocking realization, but who I am is contained in that black leather bag. WOW!

Several months ago, my daughter in law, Liz, and I were flying to Chicago from Mexico City. Just before takeoff, the pilot announced that our flight was being delayed (we had sat for 45 minutes on the runway) due to our over-weight plane. We watched as countless pieces of luggage were being towed back to the terminal from underneath our plane. My heart sank, as I thought I saw my luggage disappear out of sight. I felt lost, like part of me was being torn away.

See, things…all these things…are important to us, whether or not you claim to be a non-materialist. Material things are valuable to us. They help to make up who we are.

Many years ago when I had eight children to travel with, plus my husband, I watched a lady, who looked quite affluent to me, unload a single piece of luggage from the trunk of her car, and check into our hotel. I was ashamed at all the things that made up my security circle for the night…suitcases, overnight bag, ice chest, food boxes, stationery bag, Bible bag, diaper bag, diapers, portable crib, etc. Have you ever seen anyone go into Wal-Mart without a purse? I have, as I toted my oversized one of so many unnecessary things.

So this being still the first of a New Year, I’ve decided to part with the unnecessary, and keep “all those things” which are necessary. But it’s not coming easy, believe me. I’m actually “weaning” myself from them little by little like this:

Papers, which contain important notes I often have to refer to, I’m consolidating into fewer pieces of paper. Then I put them in a place where I won’t see them every day. In a few months, I’ll figure out the ones I haven’t referred to, and discard them…sorta like the “not-responsable-after-30-days” policy.

But let’s face it. There will always be “all these things” that make up our security area, our comfort zone: My Bible. There isn’t another one like it, so to say I’ll leave mine at home, and use another one available at my destination won’t do the trick. My Bible is just one of my “all these things,” like my prayer book, my diary (journal), my glasses, and even a certain perfume.

I believe we can come to terms with the “all these things” in our lives if we live by a simple rule: “If I take care of spiritual things, God will take care of my physical things…food and clothes.”

I’m a very black-and-white kind of person. I need to draw lines, and see things clearly. When I wonder what that could possibly mean, to “seek first the kingdom of God,” I can think of no clearer application, emphasizing the words “first,” and “kingdom of God,” as meaning simply this in language even I can understand: If I will devote the first part of my day to seeking God, reading His Word, spending time in prayer, and at the same time just literally putting to one side all my material concerns which could even include a daughter who is threatening to miscarry, a daughter in law who has a serious health problem, and focusing on God, He will honor my desire to seek Him early.

This is how I practically do this: when something comes to my mind, for example, when I’m reading my Bible, I just write it down on a little note pad, and promise myself to think of it later. In a very literal way, I’m putting this problem, this burden, or even a phone call, or something to purchase, to one side, until first I have sought the Lord, and His righteousness.

Matthew 6: 32-33 mentions the phrase “all these things” twice.

But there’s another “all these things” mentioned in Romans 8:37: “Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.” All these things: tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, peril, or sword. That pretty well covers it all. We are more than conquerors in all these things.

So while you’re resolving to clean out “all these things” in your closet or desk or kitchen drawers, how about your spiritual clutter? Worry, and negative thoughts, and jealousy, and envy. How about gossip, and a critical spirit, or discouraging words? Toss it out with stress, and depression and complaining.

Resolve with me, that at the beginning of 2012, you can look back over this year, and be on another level of your spiritual walk with the Lord. Let’s upgrade our Christianity, and as we get rid of “all these things” that clutter our closeness with the Lord, He’ll replace them with “all these things” that we have need of.

Have a Happy uncluttered New Year!

Chapter 8 "Who Shall Lead Them?"

2011-01-29T17:54:00.000-06:00

Chapter Eight
“Who Shall Lead Them?”
“But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the Kingdom of heaven.”

Second only in importance to their first birth, or maybe even first, is the second birth of our children. I’m referring to their salvation…their spiritual birth. The Bible says, “Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.” Those are the words of Jesus spoken to a man, Nicodemus.

This is not supposed to be a preachy book, and I certainly won’t lecture here. But the most important thing our child will ever do is to make sure when they die, they will go to Heaven.

In the past two months, three of my grandchildren have received Jesus as their Savior. So maybe this is what prompted me to write a chapter on the Salvation of our eight children.

In my way of thinking, God created woman to bear children. He formed her in such a unique way, not only physically, but also emotionally and psychologically, that her very nature enables her to care for her children exactly the way God needs a child to be cared for. And in no way another person can care for that child. There are circumstances, for example, when a mother dies giving birth that someone else must take over this awesome responsibility. I know personally many, many adoptive mothers who love their children as much as if she had brought them into the world.

But there is something in every child given to him that only his mother gave him. I often tell women, “God tailor-made you for your child. You’re exactly what he needs.”

I never attempt to set down patterns or footprints in this book for you to follow, because my children are different from yours. Not two of my eight children are alike. They have different needs, even now as adults, and they certainly had different needs when they were children, and weak areas in their lives that differed from those of their seven siblings.

You ask for wisdom to take care of the unique needs of your children. Read James 1:5, and ask God for wisdom. Read a Proverb every morning before starting your mothering tasks. I do, even though my children are all grown now, and have children of their own. But you never stop being a mother.

While our children are different, with different needs, and differing personalities, there is one need every child has. And that is the need of a personal Savior…a need to prepare himself for eternity.

I’m going to say something that perhaps you will disagree with. It’s not up to you to lead your children to the Lord. It’s your responsibility to train them in such a way, that when they reach the “age of accountability” they will respond to the Holy Spirit’s calling.

I am going to be very open in this chapter, and a bit controversial. We have such idealistic dreams as parents, don’t we? We envision a lot. I remember when our second child, Joel Edward was born, Tommy was almost two. I always had visions of gathering my children around me, donned in jammies, sweet smelling from their baths, and reading to them. I could see them with their little heads against me, hungry to hear more about the book I was reading to them.

To my dismay, it didn’t happen…at least not right away. Joel was about two years old, and I had already put baby Philip to bed. We lived in a little village where absolutely nothing happened after 7:00. That night I purposed in my heart to carry out that vision. I had three little boys, and now was a perfect time to start making my dream a reality.

So I sat down on our couch in our little tiny mobile home, opened a book, and said, “Come here, boys, I’m going to read you a story before you go to bed.” Tommy crawled up on my right, and Joel grabbed a book of his own, and crawled up on my left. Undaunted, I plowed ahead, reading, even though I knew their baby minds still couldn’t grasp all the words on the page. I noticed Joel being a little rough with his book, so I said, “Joel, don’t tear the book. You should be nice to your books. Did you know books are our friends? One of these days, you’re going to learn to read, and you will have many, many books for your friends.” He took his book in his chubby little hands, raised it up, and said, “Well, Howdy!”

And so it is with our children’s salvation. We dream of the day we can show them how when they die, they can go to Heaven. But don’t get ahead of the Holy Spirit. If you do your part…reading the Bible to them every day, even before they can read and write, keeping them in church, being a Godly example, making sure the people who touch their lives are Godly people, praying with them, teaching them to memorize Scripture…you can trust the Holy Spirit to touch their little hearts when they come to that age.

A few days ago, I was out soul winning. I came upon a young man in his twenties. I said, “Do you know when you die that you’re going to Heaven?” He said, “When I was 8 years old, I was baptized in a Baptist Church. But I had no idea what was going on. My mother took me by the hand during the invitation, and pulled me down to the front. There was a big baptistery on the platform, and what could I do in front of 500 people? I was only 8 years old. That’s why I don’t think a child should be baptized until they’re 14 years old.”

While I felt sorry for this confused young man, I don’t think we can really put an age on when a child comes to the age of accountability. But it’s a long, long time before he reaches his teen years, I’ll guarantee you.

You should be very, very careful who teaches your children. Two of our children were presented the plan of salvation before they were ready to be saved. These were good people. But they tried to force a decision before the Holy Spirit had worked in their little hearts. We never pressured our children into being saved. But they were saturated with the Word of God. We gathered around our table every morning before breakfast, and had Bible reading and Scripture memorization. We never missed church. We did our best to put a guard around them, as far as sinful activities were concerned. But we never pressured our children into making a profession of faith.

All of our children are saved. Afterward, my husband baptized each of our children in different rivers in Chiapas. I felt sorry for this young man a few days ago, as I explained to him that baptism is a work. It isn’t part of our salvation. But I’ve heard my husband say too many time to remember how many, that “if you’re saved, and don’t want to get baptized, I don’t believe you’re saved.” I believe a desire to be baptized after salvation, is as natural as wanting to wear a wedding band after you get married.

Bringing a baby into the world physically is an awesome experience. But it’s as natural as breathing. So also, leading a child to a spiritual re-birth should be natural, and a wonderful experience for us as parents.

God Is So Good!

2010-12-22T23:55:00.000-06:00

God is so Good!

God is so Good? If God is so Good, why did He allow me to be born into a home, where my father was a drunkard, and didn’t know God? God is so Good?

Yes, God is Good, because He gave me a mother who did love God, who prayed for my father, and read her Bible every night. God is so Good!

God is so Good?
If God is so Good, why did He allow my father to mock my mother and her Bible, and her God? God is so Good?

Yes, God is Good, because one day my father went to church, and accepted Christ as his Savior, and the God of my mother’s Bible. God is so Good!

God is so Good? Then why these doubts…these fears that I feel when my father explains to me that even though I’m only 8 years old, if I were to die in my sins, I’d go to hell? Does that show the goodness of God? Would a Good God condemn a little girl to hell?

Yes. But God is so Good, because Daddy read to me in the Bible that God loved me so much that He sent His Only Begotten Son to earth to die on the cross for my sins…in my place. He suffered death in my place, the death penalty for my sins so that I could have eternal life. God is so Good!

God is so Good? Would a Good God take my parents to Mexico, when in the middle of my teen years, when I was sixteen years old, I had to leave my friends, my school, my church, and my country to go to a strange land, whose language I didn’t understand, and whose customs were as different as the food and the people? God is so Good?

Yes, God is Good, because, although at times in my rebellion, little by little God let me learn Spanish, the customs, and even to love the Mexican people. And He put a desire, a call into my heart to spend the rest of my life serving the people of Mexico. God is so Good!

God is so Good? Why would he want me to serve Him alone? I was 24 years old, and not one man had appeared in my life who wanted to serve God the way I wanted to serve Him, where I wanted to serve Him. God is so Good?

Yes. God is Good, because I decided to serve God with or without a husband. God Who is so Good, gave me peace!

…and also a husband. God is so Good for sending me a husband…the man of my dreams, Tom Sloan!
God is so Good!

God is so Good? Then why did He allow Tom to suffer the last 24 years of his life from Parkinson’s disease? Why was he so limited in his medical profession? God is so Good? Then why did He take him away from me? Why did He take him to Heaven? Why couldn’t we spend our last years on earth together? Couldn’t we have served Him better together? Couldn’t he have served God better with good health?

It’s been six years now since he left, and I ask myself, “Why? Why? Why? Why so many abortions? Why so many divorces? Why so much crime? Why so many broken hearts and broken vows? Why so many abandoned children, and abused women? Why is a little nine year-old girl dying of cancer?

Could it be there are moments…instants when God ceases to be Good?
No, no! A thousand times No!
God allows sickness, and sorrows, and poverty, and abandoned children, and cancer in little ones to draw us closer to Him, so that He can show us His love and His mercy and His grace.
It’s when we suffer most that we need more of His love and His comfort.
The greater the heartache, the more of His grace and His presence I need. The more I have to depend on Him.
I give Him my sorrow, and He gives me His joy.
I give Him my battles, and He gives me His victory.
I give Him my anxieties, and He gives me His peace.
I give Him my sins, and He gives me His forgiveness.
God is so Good?
Yes, God is so Good!

December 2010 Prayer Letter

2010-12-22T23:51:00.004-06:00

Dear Friends,

As I write this letter, I am beginning what will be a new adventure for me: a furlough. Because my son, David, and his wife, Jolene and their three children are in America for the birth of their 4th child, and will be returning to Ukraine in March, I have decided to spend some of this time with them. But I would also like to present my work to your church if you think I could be a blessing to you.

Over 36 years ago, my husband and I moved with our three small sons to a little village called Ixtapa. It was there that we actually started our mission work, and the training of Indian pastors. After 32 years, God has laid it on my son in law, Ulises’ heart to return to this town to begin a new work. He and Elizabeth, my daughter, go every Saturday to hand out tracts and evangelize. Not only have they seen many souls saved, they have received an invitation to start a church there. Please pray for the progress of this work.

The theme of our 12th annual Ladies’ Christmas Banquet this year was “God is So Good.” My son, David, did a wonderful job preaching, and when the invitation was given, there were four saved, including a congresswoman, and the sister of a former first lady. We also celebrated the fifty years of God’s goodness and blessings to me after having arrived in México in 1960 with my parents and three brothers. I’m thankful for the honor of getting to live in México for most of my life, and am grateful to the Lord for calling me to be a missionary.

I am including an essay I wrote and read during the program, and I hope it will convey to you the gratitude I feel in my heart, and which I pray will encourage you to be thankful during this wonderful time of the year, as we celebrate the birth of our Savior.

May God’s riches blessings be yours as you begin a New Year.

Your friend,
Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

Between You and Me / The Power of Negative Thinking

2010-12-07T00:10:00.002-06:00

“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and there be any praise, think on these things.”
Philippians 4:8

My husband and I bought our first Van after all eight of our children were born. So with our pickups and our Suburban our front seats were not divided. Not until several years after our youngest was born did we buy our first vehicle that had a divided front seat. So for almost half of our married years, I was able to sit next to my husband when he would drive. If you’re under thirty years old, you probably can’t relate to the past few sentences.

We raised our children before the strict safety laws were passed. So we always had a baby in the front with us. Although it would have been very practical to have placed our little one between the two of us, my husband would always put the seat or bed by the door, so I could sit next to him. He was very particular about there being nothing between him and me.

That was also an important principle in our marriage. There should never be anything between a husband and wife, in order for there to be a sweet relationship.

In a few days my children and I will be remembering that Sunday afternoon six years ago, when my husband went to Heaven. Now that I’m a widow, I find myself becoming more aware of things that come between the Lord and me…things that make it harder for me to feel His presence. When I become negative in my thinking, it’s hard for me to sense His nearness.

As I prepare this lesson, I find myself in a lovely hotel room, with an adjoining room where my son, David, and his wife, Jolene, and their three children are staying. I will be traveling with them, as they visit churches in America for the next few months, before their return to Ukraine, where they serve as missionaries. If you really want to spend quality time with someone, go on a road trip with them. One thing that impresses me most about my son is his positive thinking. I’ve observed many obstacles during this trip, which included a cross-country trip through Mexico. But he refuses to give up, or give in to little setbacks. And there’s power in that kind of thinking. Positive thinking achieves goals.

There was a book out several years ago called The Power of Positive Thinking. I never read it, but without even opening it, one can imagine the teaching of the author.

But there’s also power in negative thinking. I’ve experienced it recently, as I’ve had such thoughts as: “I’m not going to have enough money, I’m going to run out of time, and I’m not going to get this lesson ready by my deadline.”

So I’ve come up with a little remedy: as we were traveling along today, I was having such negative thoughts. They began to cloud my mind, and my disposition. So I just imagined myself sitting at a big desk, in a lovely room, leisurely working on this lesson. And immediately I felt my spirit brighten, and the Lord lifted my burden.

And here I am.

When I prepare my lessons, I must keep a positive attitude. Sometimes I have to psyche myself up by thinking, “Someone needs this. This is going to be a blessing to someone today. This may even change someone’s life, or even save their marriage.”

It’s more fun to be positive than to be negative. For example, if you’re a homemaker, just imagine yourself standing in your laundry room surrounded by piles of dirty laundry. You can either lie down on top of the clothes, and cry yourself to sleep in a fit of depression. Or you can close your eyes and imagine those clothes washed and folded in nice organized stacks. That’s a great motivator, also, to get busy and do something about our challenges.

There is an element of faith to thinking positively. You have to learn to trust. Trust the Lord to supply time you don’t have, strength you don’t possess, or money you lack in order to carry out your responsibilities and commitments. That’s what Salvation is all about. If you don’t trust the Lord to supply the faith that you lack in order to believe in His death, burial, and resurrection, you can’t be saved.

Positive thinking isn’t a humanistic approach to living. It’s a biblical principal. In Philippians 4:4-8, Paul tells us that our attitude has a lot to do with our relationship with the Lord. We can either rejoice, or complain. We have the choice to trust, or to worry; we can grumble, or be thankful; we can always be telling others about our problems, or we can tell them to the Lord. When we choose the positive options, we have peace with God, and therefore our relationships with others are what they should be. I’m not making this up. That’s what Paul is telling us.

Did you know negative thinking can affect your health? I’m told that many people who have stomach ailments are worriers. Many, many years ago when my husband and I first moved to San Cristóbal, we became acquainted with a precious couple who were quite a bit older than we were. We would get so amused at them. Hubby was a happy-go-lucky sort of fellow, and enjoyed eating right off the carts of the Indian street vendors in our little mountain valley home. He never was sick. His wife, however, was always sick. She would prepare “bugs” which I believe amounted to yogurt that she would consume in ample amounts in order to “keep the bacteria away.” She would come to my young husband, being the only American doctor in town, and he would kindly prescribe medication for her stomach upsets, and lovingly and patiently give her advice to calm her tummy woes. But later he’d smile as he’d tell me, “If she’d just go out to dinner every once in a while with her husband, and eat what he eats and relax, she wouldn’t have that trouble.”

At the risk of sounding pious, my desire is for everything I do to be part of what produces God’s perfect plan for my life. So when I doubt and fear that I will lack anything in order to carry out that plan, whether it is money, strength, time, wisdom, health or protection, I’m building a wall between the Lord and me. Doubt is the opposite of faith; fear is the opposite of trust; and doubt and fear produce negative attitudes and negative thoughts.

Negative thoughts are exhausting; thinking positively energizes and motivates.

Negative thinking never makes dreams come true; negative thinking destroys.

Negative attitudes are powerful enough to make a child fail in his studies, and negative thinking makes for unreached goals.

Do you think your husband’s plan to start his own business is a lot of nonsense? Imagine him as an important CEO. Negative thinking can destroy a marriage, because it longs for encouraging words from its mates.

Do you have a child who is failing in Math? Encourage him as if he were making straight A’s. A child’s confidence is torn down by the power of a mother’s negative thinking.

I pray this prayer every morning: “Lord, help me to be a blessing to those around me.” But when I have a negative attitude, I affect others in a negative way.

However, the greatest damage my negative thinking does is to shadow the presence of God in my life. And just between you and me…

I don’t want that to happen.

Between You and Me / Anxiety

2010-11-12T00:05:00.003-06:00

“And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be brethren.”
Genesis 13:8

I have four daughters, and four sons. To each of you I say, “I don’t want there to be anything between you and me.” I have four sons in law, and four daughters in law. “I hope there will never be anything between you and me.” I have three brothers. To them and my sisters in law I say the same “Don’t let anything come between you and me.” If you know me, I want there to be nothing between you and me. I want our relationship to be everything it should be, whether as your mother, your sister, or your friend.

There’s a story in the book of Genesis about a man and his nephew. Abraham was a wealthy man. God had blessed him with cattle and land. He lived in the land of Canaan with his wife, Sarah, and his nephew, Lot. They migrated there from Ur, a land of pagan idolatry. It was in this place that God chose to bring Abraham to start a new generation that would love and serve Him. Abraham didn’t use the excuse that he came from a pagan background. He trusted God to fulfill His promise through him and Sarah, although they were both nearing 100 years of age.

Everything belonged to Abraham. Lot was a tag-along. In fact God’s original plan was for Abraham to leave all. In part he obeyed, but not completely, because he brought Lot and his father, Terah with him. The Bible says that Terah was an idolater.

One day Abraham noticed that his servants and those of Lot were fighting over the greenest pasture for their sheep. Abraham valued the relationship with his nephew more than his animals. He knew that if their shepherds were disagreeing, in a short time, so would they. So although everything belonged to Abraham, he came up with a solution: “Lot, you choose the pasture land you would like to have. If you go to the left, I’ll go to the right. If you choose the right, I’ll go to the left.” And Lot chose the richest pasture land. It reminded him of the rich land of Egypt, which by the way he remembered, because Abraham had taken his family there during the time of famine, instead of trusting the Lord to provide his needs.

Abraham was willing to give up the best pasture land in order to keep anything from coming between him and his nephew.

God saw Abraham’s heart, and He called Abraham apart to live in the land of Hebron. Hebron means “the place of communion.” The verb commune means to communicate intimately. Abraham and God were friends, intimate friends.

Abraham was far from perfect. But God chose him to be the father of a nation.

Maybe because I’m a widow, and I don’t have the companionship of a husband, but I long to have an intimate relationship with God. I’m not where I wish I were in our relationship, but I know what I long for.

But just as there are things that come between a husband and a wife to harm their relationship, there are things that can wedge themselves between the Lord and a Christian. I know. I’ve experienced it. Just as I’ve enjoyed close communion with the Lord, I also know what it is to feel something is not right.

The ultimate goal of a Christian should be to please the Lord, and bring honor to Him in all we do. Unless we take stock of our lives, and acknowledge what it is that is hindering our relationship, whether between husband and wife, mother and child, or a Christian and the Lord, we’ll never make that relationship more intimate.

So I’ve tried to analyze my personal relationship with the Lord, and I came up with a list of possible problems that could come between the two of us. At the top of my list is “Anxiety.” I’m going to share with you what I’m feeling this morning.

The dictionary defines anxiety as “uneasiness usually over an expected misfortune.” If I’m going to be a blessing to you, I must expose my feelings, and I’ll have to admit, I very often have feelings of anxiety. I started this lesson exactly one week away from a very exciting trip. The most unsettling thing I do is to leave the comfort and security of my beloved home. But this was going to be a happy trip, because I was meeting my son, David, and his wife, Jolene and their three children, whom I had not seen in almost two years. I was also going to be attending a Christian Womanhood Spectacular, which I’ve attended only in my dreams since I was a young wife and mother. The joy and thrill of that precious reunion, and my dream of a lifetime come true, was being over-shadowed by anxiety: what if my plane from Chiapas takes off late, and I don’t have enough time to change planes in Mexico City? What if the hotel I reserved for that night cancels my reservation, because I have a late check-in, and I have to sleep in the lobby, or in the airport? Is it cold in Chicago in October? Should I take a coat? Will my luggage be over-weight? And on and on went the “uneasiness” of this “expected misfortune.” Not only do those feelings bring a distance between the Lord and me, it robs me of the joy I should be feeling, it makes me unproductive, it robs me of much-needed sleep, it makes me irritable with others, it makes me say things that I wouldn’t say, or even think if I would simply do what the Bible tells me to do in Philippians 4:6, “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” The most valuable treasure anxiety takes from me is peace, the peace of God, according to this Scripture. I need to do what Peter tells me to do, “Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” I Peter 5:7 Peter was a fisherman, and I believe we can imagine our casting our cares on Jesus, just as Peter cast his net into the sea. I don’t envision God sitting up in Heaven, shaking His head in disgust at me for not trusting Him, because of the last part of that verse, “He careth for you.” Our anxieties are important to Him, because they’re part of what keeps us from being close.

So I took practical measures to at least limit my anxieties. I made a list of things I needed to get done before my departure date. I even put little abbreviations of the day I should have each one finished by the side of each item. I at least knew what needed to be done.

There are anxieties I have which are real. I have actually slept in a hotel lobby, but I have precious memories of that short night, and the lessons the Lord taught me. I have also had luggage that exceeded the weight limit several times. But I’ve also seen the Lord deliver me from having to leave anything behind, or even having to pay extra.

Many things that cause our anxiety, whether real or imagined, can be useful: they can motivate us to get organized, take stock of the way we spend our time, or just simply be thankful for someone, perhaps, we’re afraid we’re going to lose. Just as I may know the consequences of my plane taking off late, I must realize there are certain things over which I have absolutely no control. I can’t control the weather in Chicago, any more than I can control flight schedules. I must do as Peter tells me. I must cast my care on Him, Who cares for me, and realize that some things are totally out of my control. I must do the best I can to be on time for all my flights, and I wisely went online, checking the weather forecast for Chicago. But the success of failure of my trip didn’t depend on everything going perfectly. It depended on my trust in the One Who cares for me, and Who is in the “control tower” of my life.

So that morning I went fishing. I did some casting. I did this by just talking to the Lord, and admitting my anxieties to Him. I prayed for my pilots, and I asked Him to put kind people in my path. I asked Him to give me His peace for my anxieties.

And that’s exactly what He did.

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 7

2010-11-09T22:34:00.001-06:00

“The Common and Ordinary.
The Schedules and Routines”

I am writing this book shortly after my 65th birthday. I have eight children, and twenty-eight grandchildren. At the moment of this writing, I have been alone for almost three weeks. I am taking a brief respite from work and travels, and am enjoying being able to make my own schedules and establish my own routine.

Ordinarily, I am with one or more of my children, their spouse and their children. So there are times when I must “go with the flow,” and keep up with their pace. If I am traveling with my son, David, and his wife, Jolene and their three children…which is the only way I can spend time with them every two years during their visit in America, and before their return to their mission field of Ukraine…I must go on their strict routine and schedules.

When I’m at home in Chiapas, living across the drive from my church, necessitates doing certain things before people arrive in my yard for certain activities.

Even during this luxurious break from my normal routine, I am staying in a mission apartment, so I must comply with certain schedules of the church activities, which I thoroughly enjoy: ladies’ Thursday morning visitation, ladies meetings, and other church activities.

Can one ever say, “I am the sole ruler of my life? I can plan my day how I want, doing exactly what I would like to do, and when, and until I get ready, I’ll not quit?” Will I ever be so independent that I can completely eliminate all interruptions and distractions? I think not.

If that is your dream, as it is mine at times, let me confirm that the happiest person on earth is not the person who has all the money she wants to spend, spending it however she likes, with whomever she pleases. She does not get up at her leisure, and sleep whenever she gets tired.

Even in this brief time that I am at liberty to “do as I please, and go as I please,” I have found myself forming little limitations, routines, and schedules. Not only do I feel more rested than if I had nothing to account for having gotten up in the morning, but I actually have a sense of having accomplished things that I could have otherwise not gotten done had I been surrounded by children and grandchildren. I schedule times for reading, relaxing, and napping. I have a routine for shopping, and doing fun things. I have gone to the library, and browsed through expensive purses and suits, although I haven’t purchased them.

There is something inside us…at least inside me…that demands order…reasons for doing what I do, answers to “what am I doing here, and why am I doing this?”

And so it is with raising children.

I remember when my children were small, I would go to bed at night, and look back over my day with disgust. What had I done? I had washed, and cooked and cleaned. I had bathed my children, washed dirty faces and hands before meals. I had put them down for naps, washed out diapers, folded mountains of laundry, and I had made out menus and grocery lists. I had home schooled. All these activities were products of routine and schedule. And I would think, “I just worked and worked all day around my children, and never took time to talk with them, or play games with them, or listen to their stories.” Than I would begin to fantasize about the next day, and how I would change my life: “I’ll get up in the morning, and before I dress, or fix breakfast, or start school, I’ll sit down in the living room floor and play games with them. I’ll leisurely stroll into the kitchen, and have breakfast on the table in twenty minutes. Then before dishes are done, we’ll dress and go out for a walk.”

And on and on my fantasizing would go.

The next morning, just as one would step onto a ramp like the one you put your groceries on at Wal-Mart, or lug your luggage (so that’s where luggage got its name!) onto the ramp at the airport, I would step out of bed, and onto my routine-ramp, and before you knew it, it would be eighteen hours later, and I had nothing more to show for my day than the same things I had performed the day before.

But without my even knowing it, I was creating a nest of security for my children, and for myself. My children knew what to expect. They knew what came next, and what was expected of them, and what they could look forward to. There were certain dishes I prepared on certain days.

The greatest damage the devil can do to your happiness is to convince you that you are doing everything wrong. You’re the reason for all your problems. And many times he convinces us to do things the way everyone else around us is doing it.

From the time our children were born, until they left for college, we had a naptime routine. This didn’t necessarily come at the same time every day, but it did fall into the same slot: immediately after lunch, which at our house was about 2:00. We raised our children in Mexico, where the big meal of the day is served in the afternoon, usually between 2:00 and 3:00. This beautifully allows families to come home from school and work, enjoy a leisurely meal together, and then return to their work or school around 4:00. This is called, Siesta Time, and in my little mountain village, many shops and businesses close down during that time.

This is perhaps why this routine started, but even today, I find myself looking for a quiet corner wherever I am, as soon as lunch is over, and dishes are done, and enjoying a thirty-minute to hour long nap. I won’t go into the benefits of this tradition, because I’m talking about routines and schedules.

But even as I have spent these three weeks alone, I religiously take my delicious naps every afternoon. The great joy of being alone is that I can manage my own naps whenever I like…not while grandbabies are down for their naps.

There is a joy, and sense of fulfillment, a feeling of “doing what I should be doing, when I should be doing it,” in routine and schedules, even at my age. I schedule one hour for writing this book, immediately after my devotions. So my mind is not tangled up in thinking, “I should be preparing my IRS, or making phone calls, or running to Wal-Mart.”

Isn’t this somewhat similar to being in the center of God’s will? While your children are too young to know God’s will, schedule and routine will provide that safety for them, that feeling of being secure in knowing that they’re doing exactly what they should be doing, at exactly the right time. This familiarity with our activities creates this warm soothing comfort zone. There is the looking forward to story time after supper around the table. “This is a tough math problem, but as soon as I’m through, I can work on my spelling words.”

Don’t you remember as a child sitting in a classroom, maybe absorbed in trying to answer a history question, and all of a sudden visions of sitting around the dinner table came to your mind? How comforting, and soothing simple routines provide for us in our times of distress.

Is it possible that my two young friends, Josh and Caleb, even as I write, are somewhere in a prison, with thoughts of their father’s home going only three days ago…and their not being able to be with their families? What could possibly get anyone through such an agonizing experience? Do they have memories of their father doing the familiar, routine things with them? The familiarity of his being behind the pulpit, of always standing for what was right? Could this be their cushion in a cold prison? This warm memory of “Dad always…”

Is it family vacations he always provided for his children, and their families every year? This “looking forward to the familiar?” Tradition, routine, schedules…that’s what brings happy memories, and cozy comfort in cold, dark prison cells.

It was routine that allowed our family to always have devotions around our dining room table. It wasn’t the powerful messages that came out of those routine times. I never had time to prepare anything, and many times my mind wouldn’t have allowed me to organize spiritual thoughts in order to convey them to my children. It was routine that allowed my children to learn Scripture passages from the time they could sit up in a high chair.

Sitting around our table, Bibles in front of us, my little papers with Scriptures to be quoted and the Scripture of the week to be memorized, brought a feeling of “everything’s going to be all right. Everything is where it should be, and everyone is where they should be.” That sense of well-being, and peace comes forth from routine…the same ole same ole.

If I had not cultivated the habit of routine, the “this-comes-after-this” way of life, there are times when I wouldn’t know which way to go when I wake up in the mornings. Perhaps because as people grow older there is this sense of not having enough years, or months or days to get everything done that I would like to accomplish in this lifetime. I feel at times that there is going to be more crammed into the next day, because I didn’t get it all done today. There is a peace, a sense of direction and purpose and accomplishment every morning, as routine guides me through my maze. It’s the turning on the coffee pot and heading for the shower…steps firm and sure that I’m doing at least one thing right this day, and so everything else should fall into place, too. Even though my mind is numb with drowsiness, and I know by looking at the clock, and by the way my body is screaming to “please, one more hour under the covers,” that three hours’ sleep is not enough to perform all the activities that lie ahead. But by the time I’m through with the normal routine, and I sit down with my coffee and Bible, I have a certain feeling of accomplishment, and of being ready for the day.

It’s that turning off the decision maker…knowing exactly what comes next…that frees my mind, once it’s awake, to start praying for my children, and the other people and things and problems I pray for every day.

There is one simple thing I’ve learned in this life: the fewer the decisions, the fewer the mistakes. The fewer the decisions, the more freedom for peaceful thoughts and tranquility. There’s no “shall I start laundry today, or wait one more day?” Well, at my house if it’s Monday or Thursday, it’s laundry day for me. No decision there, so if the electricity goes off on Monday morning, I can put something else in the laundry slot for Monday.

When my children were all at home, I had…please don’t laugh…certain dresses for certain days. I absolutely loved Saturday’s at our house, because that’s the day we didn’t have school, and I got to do only housework that day. I had a yellow dress that I used only on Saturday’s. It was short sleeved, so I had more freedom to roll out the dough for our cinnamon rolls. I never wore that dress on Wednesday’s or Monday’s…just Saturday’s. I don’t particularly like yellow, and I don’t believe it’s my color, but it was given to me, and so I wore it for housework.

So what do yellow dresses have to do with anything? I would have asked the same question before my children left home.

But after they left for college, imagine the comfort in midst of the agonizing homesickness of knowing exactly what I was wearing when my children would think of home on Saturday’s….this yellow cushion to curl up on.

No matter how silly your routine, or how weird yours may be, don’t be afraid of it. It’s tailor-made for you and your children.

The Hearbeat of a Banquet

2010-11-07T16:37:00.003-06:00

(Instead of posting Chapter 8 of my book, My Kids and Me, I’ve decided to send you some of the thoughts I’m having, and the emotions I usually feel this time of the year. Thank you for letting me share them with you.)

“The Heartbeat of a Banquet”

On Friday afternoon, November 19, just two weeks from today, Lord willing, I’ll walk into the lovely Banquet room of probably the most prestigious hotel in our little town. As always, I will arrive about an hour before 4:00 in order to arrange my personal things…my folder containing programs customized for everyone who will take part in our annual Ladies’ Christmas Banquet, and my own program, which will basically play the part of my brain for the evening, telling me exactly what I should be doing, when, and where; my Bible, handkerchief, water, pens, music, etc. Don’t worry…all those items are on a list in a pretty pink notebook I’ve chosen for my notes this year.

I also want to be relaxed and organized so I will be able to greet each lady at the door.

But I think the most important reason I arrive an hour early is because I want to take in the beauty, and the atmosphere before anyone else arrives. My daughters and several ladies from the church will arrive about 10:00 that morning to finish the final touches of the decorations.

But by 3:00, my girls will be in their rooms at the hotel, which are reserved several months before the Banquet. I did this last year, and my children said that was one of the most wonderful parts of the Banquet…being able to leisurely dress for the banquet, and step out of their rooms and into the Banquet room. And then after the banquet, not to have to take babies and belongings out to vans and carry sleeping babies into the house late at night. By the end of the banquet, babies will be in their jammies, and tucked into bed by their “nannies for the evening.”

So if I get there an hour before the Banquet, no one is there. I just walk among the tables, taking in the atmosphere of what will soon be filled with the chatter of lady friends, some who have saved all year long in order to buy their $20 dollar ticket. Some will be wearing designer dresses, some dresses will be homemade, and some will be from last year’s Banquet. This represents the different walks of life these women come from.

But what will take place here on that night will also represent hundreds and hundreds of hours of work, planning, preparation, and prayer put into this event so dear to my heart.

Thousands of dollars miraculously raised by friends, children, churches across the USA, our church here, and the hard work of my Sunday school ladies are required to fund this gala evening.

As I walk in my imagination among the tables, which will be so beautifully decorated this year with fresh flowers, my mind goes back fifty years…

…1960. I was only 16 years old that November 15th afternoon, as my parents, my three little brothers and I drove across the border, and along the two-lane highway that led me away from my country, my beloved church, school, and friends into this strange land called México. Everything uncommon looks strange in the eyes of a teenage girl: the people, their customs, their food, and their language.

I was blessed enough to have a teenage brother who was my very best friend and constant companion. We even enrolled in school together, and for the next three years, which would conclude our high school years, we sat in the same classrooms, and shared the same friends. We went on “dates,” and we clowned around. We even enjoyed staying in the same bedroom in twin beds while we soaked in all the attention required for two teenagers with hepatitis.

How do a different people become yours? What makes a strange country become home? Why is it sometimes easier to express yourself in a second language than in your first language?

It happens by just being there, and letting it happen. It isn’t learned, and it isn’t forced on you. It happens to you like a sweet aroma happens to you when you walk through a garden, or a forest.

Never in my wildest teenage dreams would I ever imagine loving a land, a country, a city, a people like I love my home, and the place where God has called me.

I believe when God gives a call, He also gives a love. It’s like a magnet drawing you to it, whether it is to care for your children, to care for the sick, to pastor a church, or to minister to prisoners. The surrender to God’s call brings peace.

We’re talking heartbeats here.

My girls and the ladies in our church make up the core of the production of this event. They’re considerably younger than I am, and the part they play in this annual affair requires lots and lots of hard physical work…work with their hands, as they spend hours designing invitations, creating the lovely corsages for each special lady, making centerpieces.

Their tired feet walk and run from sun up until sundown, chasing toddlers, running errands, shopping, reserving, and ordering.

Their voices make phone calls, and rehearse songs, and invite friends.

Fingers work almost non stop at their computers, typing out programs, songs and menus; or punching in phone numbers as they call to make sure reservations are confirmed.

But the part of my anatomy that will be working most throughout the months and now days before the Banquet will be my mind. My mind works although I lie down for an afternoon nap. In my mind I can picture how I want everything to be that evening. I see the platform; I see the tables reserved for special guests; I hear the songs.

I go over and over in my mind the essay I will be reading that evening…something I’ve done ever since our first Banquet years ago…a speech that goes with the theme for the Banquet.

And you can’t involve the mind without getting the heart in on the act. My heart is stirred at times while I’m alone in the early hours of the morning with the Lord. As I open my Bible and read, my emotions are active as I realize the theme of this year’s banquet: “Celebrating Fifty Years of God’s Goodness.”

For some of the ladies attending that evening, this is probably one of many invitations that they will receive. Because of their position in life, events like this abound. Why do they choose this particular one year after year after year? Because the heartbeat of our Banquet, the purpose of this annual event is reaching hearts, and stirring emotions. And year after year these ladies tell me before they leave, “Thank you for this evening. It’s the highlight of my year, and of this season. My heart feels so full.”

If my heart isn’t prepared for that evening, their hearts won’t be touched.

As I grow older, my mind works a lot more than my hands or my feet do. My mind works now in fact, more than my hands or feet ever worked when I was a young mother. Only when I sleep does it also rest.

But my body gets tired and weary, so I must, especially during this time, make sure I eat the right food, and get enough rest…even more than I normally would. My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, and I’ve noticed when I’m physically exhausted, my spirit is weary, also, and I’m not as aware of His presence.

I desire an alert sound mind, which is required of me as I write, speak, and teach.

I pray this prayer every night before I go to bed, for my children and for their mother: “Help me/us to wake up in the morning refreshed and encouraged about the challenge of a new day.”

If you read this, and if you are praying for this Banquet, will you also pray for the Lord to give this 66 year-old mind alertness required for the days ahead, and especially for the evening of November 19? Pray for my heart to be soft and not hard as I face the challenges and demands of each day.

And pray for the Holy Spirit to touch and change the hearts of the ladies who attend, so when they walk out that evening, they’ll be forever different than when they walked in.

Prayer Request List for Ladies' Christmas Banquet November 19, 2010

2010-10-26T19:34:00.005-05:00

1. Wisdom and discernment in all the plans and decisions to be made.
2. Extra strength for the girls and me as we plan and make preparations.
3. For the wife of the city mayor, Idalia Garcia de Diaz, to be able to attend.
4. For the wives of the former mayors to be able to attend.
5. For extra finances for the cost of the Banquet, hotel reservations, plane reservation, etc. for our guest speaker.
6. Preparation of the special music, and choice of each song.
7. For our guest speaker, my son, David Sloan, missionary to Ukraine, as he prepares his message for the evening.
8. For the Hotel staff to be reached with the Gospel.
9. That the Lord would prepare the hearts of the ladies who will be attending, and for many to be saved, who will be an influence to others. We have had ladies saved in every banquet for the past nine years, including two former First Ladies.
10. For wisdom for my son-in-law, Ulises Martinez, our banquet administrator.

NOTE: This banquet is an annual affair, and will be attended by ladies, who for the most part are unsaved, and who either because of religious preferences, or pressures from home, do not attend our Church. The Lord laid these dear ladies on my heart several years ago, and I am as burdened for them as I am for the ladies in my Sunday School class.

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

October 2010 Prayer Letter

2010-10-11T06:49:00.000-05:00

Dear Friends of México,

I can say with all my heart there is no place else on earth I had rather be than right here in Chiapas, doing exactly what I’m doing. I long for more results from my labors, but I rest content, knowing that God is the One Who gives the increase. My job is simply to be faithful.

You may have heard about the flooding in Chiapas. My daughter, Anna, and her husband, Andrés, and their two children were unable to get out of the village where they were attending the wedding of his nephew last weekend, until a canoe arrived, and they rode over water covering the tops of trees. The 20-minute dangerous ride ended safely, and God saw them to the other side of the river. Thank you for your prayers.

It was my joy to have won two ladies to the Lord since my last letter. Another lady who has been attending my monthly ladies’ prayer breakfasts invited me to her home to teach her how to pray. I told her the most important prayer she would ever pray is “Lord, be merciful to me a sinner.” Pray that Eva will soon be saved.

Our good friend of many years, Pastor Louis Horton, and two of his members, Bro. Warren Stallard, and Bro. Ernie Flores, were guests here during the month of August. Pastor Horton preached a conference. When they returned to Decatur, TX, Bro. Ernie surrendered to start a Spanish work in their town. Thank the Lord for answering my prayer of nine years!

On the personal side, I received the joyful news that my grandbaby #33 is on the way. Steve and Ruthie are looking forward to the birth of their 7th from Heaven in April, 2011.

In about a month, Lord willing, we will be holding our 12th Annual Ladies’ Christmas Banquet, on November 19. I am sending a list of special requests, and ask that you pray regularly for this event. The greatest need I have is for wisdom.

Your friend and servant,
Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 6

2010-09-05T00:50:00.002-05:00

“Hedges”

Did you know I’m using you? You’re my “practice audience,” since I decided to put this book on my blog before actually turning it into a physical book you can touch. Thank you.

Since we have this special relationship, I’ll let you in on a secret: I believe this chapter about Hedges should have gone before Chapter 4, “Blending Routine and Schedule With Extras.” But when it appears in book form, it will be in that order, hopefully.

It’s been a long, long time since my children were little, and times have changed since then. I remember walking into the bedroom of my daughter, Ruthie the day after the birth of her first baby, and gasping at the sight of little Steven lying on his back. I calmly asked her if he shouldn’t perhaps be on his tummy. She also calmly walked across the room and brought me a book entitled, “Why You Should Never Place a Baby on His Tummy.” Wow!

When my babies were little, disposable diapers and Wet Wipes were exclusively for travel and nurseries. Those are common necessities for my grandbabies.

I know there are a lot of things my children do differently in the raising of my grandchildren, and I would never attempt to challenge them, even though their father was a pediatrician. But I stand strong on my convictions concerning hedges.

A hedge is a shrub of sorts. It’s a living plant that keeps in the good, and keeps out the bad. I know that’s oversimplifying, but basically that’s what it is.

But what do hedges have to do with my kids and me? Because that’s the way I survived motherhood.

I am a firm believer in confinement. Confinement is control, and control is order, and order is safety, and safety is security. Hedges are about security. What is it the Bible says about “a child left to himself?” A child left to himself is a child without hedges. A child left to himself is a child out of control. If you live in a home where a child is out of control, there is no order. Where there is no order, there is danger. And danger robs a child of security. Hence poor grades, rebellious teenagers, and drug addicts.

I often have people ask me, “How did you manage eight children when they were growing up, especially the little one?” And I reply, “Playpens, highchairs, car seats, seat belts (even before they were the law), walkers and strollers.”

I remember a missionary lady walking into our little travel trailer one day. Tommy was about a year old, and was playing in his crib. “Your baby will never develop normally if you don’t let him crawl on the floor.”

She had two children about ten and twelve years old, so I really considered her to have much more wisdom than I did. But after observing her uncontrollable son at the dinner table that night, I figured I’d just stick to my confining methods of raising my son.

There is a tendency to feel sorry for a baby who spends most of his waking hours confined to a crib or a playpen. And I believe each mother should let her instincts guide her in many areas of childrearing. But at least from my own experience, when my children ran around all day, pulling out drawers, climbing onto the table, and turning over lamps, just so I could say I didn’t cruelly confine him, “Mama wasn’t happy. And when Mama’s not happy, nobody’s happy.”

When your children are small, you are his hedge maker. You set the boundaries, the limits and the borders. The more physical the hedge, the clearer the limits. I’ve heard of mothers who purposefully put expensive candy dishes…with candy in them…down on a coffee table, and spend half a day spanking little hands. Baby spends the other half crying. I don’t judge you if that’s your method of training. That’s up to you and God.

But wouldn’t it be a lot simpler to put the candy dish out of reach or out of sight? Why complicate your already challenging job? I wonder if a mother like that actually looks forward to each day. I’m sure her child doesn’t.

Should motherhood indeed be a life of battles? I don’t think so. Make it easy on yourself and on your child by making visible hedges. Once the hedges are in place, then the disciplining comes into play when he steps across them. Once a baby is in his crib for naptime, or bedtime, he definitely should not be allowed to convince his mother by crying to take him out.

There are different kinds of hedges you should build around your children, regardless of your philosophy of childrearing. You don’t put your baby to sleep on the front porch the night you bring him home from the hospital. You don’t put him in a tub of water, and take him out when he’s soaked clean. Your arms are the first hedge your baby knows after his birth. Just as your womb was his hedge before birth, so your arms protect him, and provide warmth and security. We’ve all read of abandoned babies left on doorsteps of hospitals, and how that precious little one responds to the arms of a nurse, and the warmth of her body. The first hedge your baby needs is

1. Your love.

Have you ever had company, or gone out to dinner with friends, only to have your little one outdo herself by misbehaving? It is very, very possible that she is vying for your attention. I just had dinner with my daughter, Sarah, and her husband, Jason, and we were discussing how hard it must be to be a working mom with little ones. Whether these children are left with a grandmother, or a “professional” nursemaid, there surely must be a gap in their hedge of security. A child needs the attention of her mother, that no one else can provide, no matter how much that grandmother loves her, or how professional the nursemaid. The second hedge you provide for your child is

2. Your attention.

There is another hedge that is perhaps the hardest to construct, because it requires quite a bit of disciplining your own life. You should live by schedule and routine. That is almost an obsolete concept, I know, in our “do as you please, when you please, with whomever you please” world. There are no hedges around our own lives, and so we find it difficult to put them around our children’s. In a home where self discipline is not practiced by mothers, the children never know what to expect. They don’t know what time dinner will be ready, or if there will even be dinner. They sleep late on weekends, because there is no schedule for weekends.

When our children were growing up, the sky could have fallen in, (and it almost did the day our quiet little mountain village town was attacked by an Indian uprising), but we had three sit-down-around-the-table meals a day. We had family Scripture reading, memorization, songs, and prayer every single morning. Our children knew what the sound of my whistle from the kitchen door meant three times a day, and especially in the mornings. Routinely, they would wash their hands, get their Bibles and come to the table. That was as natural as breathing. Our children were secure in that little routine. Routine and schedule build character. Like it or not, they did it, or they didn’t eat. To my knowledge, not one of my eight children dislikes the Word of God. They love it. They grew up on it. It’s part of who they are, and the times they have disobeyed the Lord, His Word drew them back to Him. While you’re building hedges, please include

3. Schedules and Routines.

I hope that you would never endeavor to raise a child without the help of the Lord. I enjoyed the blessing of having a wonderful, supportive husband, who was a model father. There were times when I don’t believe I could have survived without his guidance and wisdom. I feel compassion toward women who are compelled to bring up their children without the help of a husband.

But there were dark days and nights when only the Lord could bring me through certain times involved in the rearing of our children. I could never have survived, not even with my husband by my side, had the Lord not strengthened me, and comforted me. There were times when it was impossible for their father to be with them, to protect them from danger, in making adult decisions. It was during those times that the sustaining power of prayer was all we could provide to hedge them about. There is no other hedge as valuable as that of

4. Your prayers.

I pray for each one of my children, their spouses, their children, their material needs as well as their physical ones every morning of my life, no matter where I am, or what kind of schedule my day holds. I pray for their particular problems and needs that I am aware of. I pray for their finances, and the unique challenges of their ministries, and ask the Lord to help them to work in harmony with their co-laborers. I pray for their different relationships, and their children’s education. I pray for those who may be traveling, and a special prayer for my girls who are expecting babies.

At night before I go to bed, since it is early morning in Ukraine, I pray my morning prayer for David and Jolene and their three little ones.

After praying for them, I pray for the ones who live on my continent, for the Lord to bless each one of them with a sweet and peaceful night of rest. I call all of my 29 grandchildren by name, praying that the babies would all sleep through the night so that the parents could get a good night’s rest. I pray for those who experience sleepwalking and nightmares (please don’t bother quoting me the Scriptures that prove they’re not right with the Lord.) Then I commit them to the Lord’s care, asking Him to build a hedge of protection around their houses, and that He would help them to wake up early, refreshed and encouraged about the challenge of a new day.

About 2:00 in the afternoon, I pray my nightly prayer for David and Jolene.

“Is that all you do…pray for your children?”

Yep, that pretty well sums up the story of my motherhood.

And I don’t hesitate to say, that if you want to be a good mother, that will be the story of yours.

I didn’t really enjoy writing this chapter, because it goes against my principle of never writing a book on child rearing. It’s too preachy. But at the risk of sounding authoritative, I believe there is a mother out there who believes the same way I do, but because all her friends who are young mothers “un” hedge their children to run about as they wish, you shy away from hedges. You wish with all your heart you didn’t have to go behind that baby, spanking him all day, just so you can prove your training abilities. Well, latch on to this chapter the next time you feel lonely. The stronger the hedge, the easier your job.

August 2010 Prayer Letter

2010-08-19T14:17:00.002-05:00

Dear Friends,

I hope when you hear my name, the name MEXICO comes to your mind, because I’ve lived here almost all my life…since I was a sixteen year-old. México, and in particular, San Cristóbal, Chiapas, is truly my home. It’s where almost all my memories have been made. México is where I lived when God called me to be a missionary. And I’m glad I answered “YES!” I hope you’re this happy, wherever you are, and if God has been half as Good to you as He’s been to me the past two months, you are blessed.

Since my June letter, I have been privileged to have won two ladies and a little girl to the Lord. I was honored to have been invited to once again speak to eight different ladies’ sessions at the annual Family Conference (in Spanish) in Elgin, IL. Pastor Fernández, and his wife, Martha, as always, were delightful hosts, and treated my daughter in law, Liz, and me royally.

Pastor Danny Ortiz was our conference speaker June 16-18, and while he was here, he helped to inaugurate the lovely “Casa de Recuperación”… Home for Drug Addicts…a beautiful complex situated in a garden on the side of a hill. Pray for the two young men who head up this much-needed ministry.

Vacation Bible School was lots of work, but I had lots of help, and the results: a high attendance of 149, and seventeen saved. I’d say it was worth it.

Please continue to pray for our monthly Ladies’ Prayer Breakfast. A former lady mayor attended our breakfast June 30, and last Wednesday a CPA who attended for the second time invited me to her house so I could “teach her to pray.” And I did: “God be merciful to me a sinner.” She didn’t pray that prayer, but she understood, and I pray she won’t rest until she asks God to save her. Pray for my new friend, Eva.

But I’ll have to admit; the most exciting thing that has happened to me recently, was the phone call from Ukraine on June 30, and my son David’s voice: “We’re going to have another baby!” Pray for Jolene, and for the safe arrival of my grand-treasure # 33, due to arrive in February, 2011.

Time and space fail me to tell of the wonderful Conference that ended Sunday, with Bro. Nathan Patterson, and our dear friend, Deacon Horace Clowdis. Bro. Clowdis played an enormous role in the life of my husband, Tom Sloan, even before we met. Not many like him around these days!

Billie Sloan

Nahum 1:7

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 5

2010-08-06T14:14:00.002-05:00

“Circles”

Do you ever feel like you’re going in circles? Especially if you’re a Mom?...and especially, especially if you’re a mom to small children?

If you’re old enough to remember the days (“Please, Mom,” I hear my daughters wail, “no ‘good ole days’ stories!”)…please don’t interrupt me…the days when Birdseye was more than a brand of frozen peas. It was a well-known brand of diapers…CLOTH diapers. You know, the kind you soaked in Ivory Flakes, and washed separately. Then you dried them, and folded them in such a manner that they stacked neatly in your diaper stacker, ready to reach for and use at 2:00 a.m. I remember a neat little gadget that amounted to a clothes pin on the end of a plastic stick. When baby would soil her diaper, you would simply pin a clean corner of the diaper to the stick, and swish it around in water until the “soil” was off. Then you didn’t get your hands dirty. And then we went to pre-folded diapers. There were actually diaper services…companies dedicated to laundering your babies’ diapers. “Laundering” has sure come a long way, Baby, in its definition, hasn’t it?

Having spent almost all my mothering days on the mission field, except for the first nine months, I can even remember washing diapers in a creek.

So the term “going in circles” had to have been started by a Mom, because there are days when you finish the last load of laundry, and another one is in the making. A sink full of dishes is washed, and it’s time to start dinner. You get through the last bath, fall into bed, and the vicious CIRCLE begins all over again in just a few hours.

But I learned from my kids that circles are important in raising children. You can look at a circle as something that you run in (horrible grammar, I know!), or you can use circles to your advantage.

I once had a Pastor, Dr. Jim Vineyard, who is the father of my present Pastor, Bro. Tom Vineyard. Dr. Vineyard made a statement one time that I’ve never forgotten. It didn’t contain many words, and I don’t think it was the title of his sermon. But one of the basic things I’ve learned from living 66 years on this earth is this: “Go to church. Listen to the preacher. Do what he says.” I believe with all my heart if we would apply that simple, basic principle to our lives, whether we’re seasoned Grandmas, or new Moms, there would be less need for private counseling sessions, and pastors could spend more time with their families, and dedicating their ministry to winning people to the Lord. That’s what I’ve always tried to do. Just before leaving my house to attend church I pray this simple prayer, “Lord, speak to me through the preaching of your Word. Help me to be obedient to it. I pray that it will convict me, comfort, and guide me, and show me a truth I’ve never seen before. Amen.” We’ve gotten away from basics. We’ve complicated motherhood and marriages. We’ve created false idols. There are no perfect moms or marriages. And here comes the lesson.

Pastor Vineyard said, “Draw a circle. Everything in that circle corresponds to you: your responsibilities. Everything in that circle is what you’re responsible for. Leave everything outside that circle alone. Don’t mess with it.” That was it! But I’ve never, never forgotten it. I’m saying it’s been twenty years since Dr. Vineyard made that statement, and here I am sharing it with you.

You have a circle. Yours is a Mom circle. You might have a big circle which includes wife, Sunday school teacher, and home responsibilities. Have you ever sat down and thought about all your duties? Do you even know them? Maybe that’s why you’re literally “going in circles,” when you should just be “going in circle”…YOUR circle.

I’m going to address the older moms: The older we get, the smaller our “Mom portion” of our circle gets. From the moment our children leave home, whether it’s to study, marry, or follow a career, our circle of mom responsibilities becomes smaller. Other duties may take their place, but once Johnny or Susie leaves home, throw away the diapers.

I would like to write a later chapter on “Hedges,” the “circles” we make for our children. Hedges, like circles, provide security. If a child stays within protective hedges, he’ll be happier. And so it is with circles. When we live within our circle of responsibilities, well-defined duties, we live happier, more fulfilled lives. And I’ll tell you a little secret: so does everyone else. When your child marries, she has her own circle, much like yours. But it’s hers, not yours. I’ve gotten into more trouble by stepping into other circles! Do you know what happens simultaneously when you step into another circle that doesn’t belong to you? You’re stepping OUT of yours. You’re neglecting duties of your own, and attending to those that don’t belong to you. I once heard a pastor say (here I go again!) “The bad thing about sinning is not only the offense against God. When we sin, we’re not doing the good things we should be doing.” And that’s the way it is with circles. If you’re telling your daughter in law, let’s say, how to fix noodles without having them stick together, you’re missing out on the fun of playing with your baby grandson. Leave the noodle circle to her, and remember the grandma-grandson fun is inside your circle, once you become a granny.

Is this simple logic, or what? I think the title of this chapter should kindly be worded, “Keep your nose out of other people’s business.” Nosey grandmas, nosey mother in laws. It’s no wonder we’re classified as no-no’s. It’s because we’re no-no-nosey. And that’s the truth.

Write down everything contained within your circle. Your circle might look like this:

1. Christian: read Bible, pray, witness, attend church.
2. Wife: be submissive, iron shirts, fluff his pillows, cook his breakfast at 6:00, have his coffee and slippers ready when he walks through the door, wear his favorite perfume, put on a clean apron ten minutes before he comes home, etc. etc. etc.
3. Mom: bathe baby, supervise baths, brushing of teeth, monitor bowel movements (I’m very, very serious; do you keep up with that? If you don’t, you’re headed for trouble, and for the prune aisle!) home school, wash, iron, make beds, train child to make bed, wash dishes, train child to wash dishes, potty train, discipline, read Bible, teach Scriptures, and pray with children, etc., etc., etc., etc., etc……………
4. Homemaker: organize, clean, shop, garden, entertain, sew, cook, bake, decorate, pay bills, etc., etc.
5. Church member: teach Sunday school class, study, pray for members, visit members, visit elderly and sick, pray for pastor and family, show hospitality by preparing special meal for pastor, evangelist, etc.

Your circle may include other roles. If you’re a single mom, you may not have a wife role, but you play the father role, as well as Mom…you have to work to support your children, attend ball games, and teach your son to tie his tie.

It is beyond me how on earth a woman has time to step outside her circle, and into that of others. Think about this: has anyone ever annoyed you by telling you what to do? Unless you are under that person’s authority, I’ll tell you why: because they’re not minding their own circle of business. You can’t step inside another person’s circle without stepping outside yours. If that were possible, you would have to link the circles. And guess what you have when you link circles? Did you say chain? Don’t be guilty of chaining someone to you. Don’t step inside your husband’s circle when he lovingly disciplines your child. I won’t say what I’m thinking, but…well, yes I will: did you know that’s one of the causes of homosexuality? Dads with chains in their noses. A little boy begins to see his Dad as a wimp, and that’s the image he forms of himself…a feminine image. I read that somewhere. I didn’t make that up. “You keep your hands off him. He just threw his spinach across the room. What do you expect from a 5 year-old?” And we make our children to have a low esteem of their father, the authority figure in their lives. Take the chain out of Daddy’s nose, and get back into your own circle. Do you want to get a call in the middle of the night from the police station? Then right now, before that 5 year old can shoot a bowl of spinach turned gun, get out of Daddy’s circle. Go into the bedroom and close the door, and beg for mercy for your little son. But don’t interfere. We’re not talking child abuse here. If you know me at all, you know I would never approve of that. But loving discipline is part of Daddy’s circle, and yours, too, when he’s not around.

Did you know God has a circle? Part of God’s circle is calling people into full time service. I know people today who don’t serve the Lord, because Mama stepped into God’s circle when He wanted to use them in a special way when their hearts were young and tender toward Him. Mama discouraged them. I often wonder if Mama wishes she had stayed inside her own circle. God doesn’t push or shove. You want the reins? He won’t fight. But a mama that steps inside God’s circle causes her child to forfeit the peace that comes from living their life inside God’s perfect will. Don’t be guilty of that. I pray this prayer every day, “Help me never to do anything that would discourage him or her from serving You with all their heart.”

Well, you could CIRCLE the globe, and not find a mother who loves her circle more than I do mine. I think I enjoy grandmothering more than I did mothering. Half the work, twice the fun!

HAPPY MOTHERING!...and GRANDMOTHERING!

Secrets of the Heart

2010-08-03T14:49:00.005-05:00

“…he knoweth the secrets of the heart.”
Psalm 44:21

If you had one whole day to do anything you like, what would you do? If you had all the money in the world, what would you buy? If you could spend twenty-four hours with anyone in the world, with whom would you spend them?

Do you know anything more intimate than the heart? Jeremiah said of our heart, “who can know it?”

Matthew 15:18, 19 says, “But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies:”

I’m afraid we spend too much time fixing family relationships, when in reality we should be focusing our attention on relationships between children and God…between husband and God…and between ourselves and God.

I maintain that if you have an intimate relationship with the Lord, you’ll have a good intimate relationship with your husband. If you work on having an intimate relationship with God, you’ll be the Mom He wants you to be, no matter what human authors tell us, who struggle with their own marriages, and have rebellious children.

The word intimate means interior, internal; that which comes from within. And when we apply that to our relationship with God, it takes on a very special meaning, because God is Spirit. John 4:24 “God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.”

How is your secret life? Have you ever asked yourself, “Who am I?” My pastor used to say, “The real You stands up when you’re all alone.” And that’s true. Do you want to know how your secret life is? When no one’s with you, what do you do? What do you watch? What do you read? What do you think about?

How did you answer the questions at the beginning of this devotional? If you answer honestly those three questions, I’ll tell you how your intimate relationship is with the Lord, with your husband, and with your children.

I’m convinced that if we keep our secret life clean and pure, we’ll have better marriages.

My son, Philip, preached a sermon once titled, “You Don’t Know Me.” I don’t know you. Only God really knows us.

I personally believe that every woman needs to have time alone every day with the Lord. For me, at least, that time is early in the morning, before the phone and doorbell start ringing. I guard that time jealously for the Lord. I have fellowship with Him, and He with me. This is a time that I purposely reserve for the Lord. I plan everything I’m going to do during that time. My mind is fresh, free from the burdens and pressures of the day. I’m usually in a good mood during the first hours of the day.

But sometimes the Lord gives me surprise times alone with Him, times I hadn’t planned. It’s during that time that my real character comes forth.

There are things that we do in the secret places of our heart, of our homes, in our bedrooms that are not pleasing to God. Marriages today aren’t failing because husbands don’t take their wives out to eat once a week, or because it’s been a year since he brought her flowers. Marriages are falling apart because of what happens in the secret places of our lives.

There are secret places in our minds, places we reserve for Satan: bad thoughts, inappropriate desires. Those thoughts and desires don’t stay in our minds; they become looks, glances, gestures, and then words, and finally adultery. It all started in the secret places of our hearts.

What can we do to clean out those dirty corners of our hearts, and our minds? What can we do to have an intimate relationship with God?

1. Live by principles, and not emotions. Don’t let your mood affect your decisions. Did you know that’s why we have weight problems? We feel lonely, or sad, or depressed, and what do we do? We eat. We work hard, and at the end of the day we reward ourselves with food. If you live according to principles, and you’re sad or lonely or depressed, and one of your principles says, “Thou shalt not eat chocolates,” you won’t use food as a cushion, or a security blanket. I know women who are overweight, and apparently they don’t eat a lot…in public. But what about when they’re alone?

2. Live by schedules and routine. You shouldn’t let your emotions determine what time you get up, or what you do once you’re up. I once heard a famous pastor say, “I thank the Lord there’s a place I have to be, and a time I should be there, and something to do once I arrive.” A schedule gives you purpose, and helps you to stay focused. It gives you direction and motivation. Avoid the necessity of having to make decisions. Remember, the fewer decisions you have to make, the fewer wrong decisions you’ll make.

3. Choose carefully your friends. You don’t have to be a young person in order for others to have an influence on you. The saying, “Show me your friends, and I’ll show you who you are,” doesn’t apply only to young people. It’s possible for a woman to have a good relationship with the Lord in her intimate life, but because of a negative influence, she can harm that relationship…the most important relationship a woman can have.

4. In order to have an intimate relationship with the Lord, you should reserve time alone with the Lord every day, preferably in the mornings. Don’t plan that time according to your emotions, or your mood. Plan a routine, in a private place. Ask the Lord, before you open your Bible, to speak to you through His Word, and to help you to be obedient to it. Ask Him to convict you of your sins through your reading, to comfort and guide you, and to show you a truth you’ve never seen before. And He’ll do it.

5. Remember, God desires an intimate relationship with you more than you desire it. He waits for you every day.

If you don’t know the Lord as your personal Savior, you don’t have a relationship with Him. In order to have a relationship with someone, you must know them. We know the Lord through His Son, Who died on the cross for our sins.

There’s a positive side to our lesson. Did you know God knows the secret longings of your heart? He knows the desires of your heart, the desire we have for a lost loved one to be saved, or a desire to be able to reach a goal. If you’re single, share with the Lord your desire for a husband and a home. Maybe your heart’s desire is for a baby, or the ability to win others to the Lord. Share that longing with the One who can make your dreams come true.

“Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”
Psalm 139:23, 24

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 4

2010-07-12T15:11:00.001-05:00

“Blending Routine and Schedule with Extras”

I am writing this chapter in the bedroom of the home of my daughter, Sarah, and her husband, Jason Knabb. They are missionaries in a very small town, about 4 and a half hours from my home. But I actually wrote the title for this chapter several months ago. Evidently, the Lord has let me wait until now to write about it. And that’s good, because I am a little out of my routine, and I am learning some things this week to teach you.

Today is Saturday, and if I were home, I would be putting my “Sunday” dinner on the table. Since I like to have a special time for my children to come together, even though they are all married, and have their own families, and since our Sunday’s are non-stop, I decided several years ago to have our big get-together family meal on Saturday.

Of course, this is only for my children who live near me, or for occasional visits by the others.

But today I’m working on my book…something I don’t normally do on my regular Saturday routine.

What do you do when you are raising children, and you are away from home…or maybe a special event at church doesn’t allow you to do your normal routine activities? This is something that was constantly a struggle with me.

I can remember, especially, our trips to the States when our children were all at home. These road trips took three long days. Children respond so well to routine and schedules, so I would try to maintain the basic ones that we had at home. For example, we would leave before breakfast. I could, and may, write a chapter on “How to Survive a cross-country road trip with Eight Children.” That would be fun, because it brings back memories of the preparation for the trip. I would pack breakfast food, and as soon as we were loaded up in our 15-passenger van, everyone would take out their Bibles. We would have our normal family devotions, exactly like we would were we around our breakfast table at home. We also did this once we arrived at my mother’s or my brother’s, or the mission apartment, exactly the same way: breakfast stayed on the stove to stay warm, and we would gather around the table; or travel down the road, and go through our Bible routine.

Then after prayer, we would put our Bibles away, and I would “serve” breakfast going down the road. Every one of my eight children who are reading this, are sighing with happy memories, I’m sure…I hope.

That would be followed by personal quiet time, depending on the age of each child. How relaxing to have your “quiet, personal time with the Lord” while traveling. Even now as I travel…not with eight children, and not road trips, but in planes, I love settling in my seat, either at my gate before boarding, or on the plane, and closing out the noise of the world, and reading my Bible, and having my prayer time.

But if I didn’t normally have a routine of reading my Bible, or if my children never had a schedule which allowed us to gather around the breakfast table at home every morning, it would have seemed strange indeed to have family devotions while going down the road. No one would have known what to do, and I couldn’t have instructed them from the front passenger seat.

The same goes with anything you routinely do…walking, exercising, drinking eight glasses of water a day, staying away from sweets…these don’t have to stop just because we’re in different surroundings, with unfamiliar people. Once a routine is established, it’s easier to carry it out than it is to omit it.

I’ve read stories of young men who went off to war, but they still had their quiet time. How did they do this? I don’t know, and I can’t even imagine. But they did, because their routine and schedule was so instilled in them during normal days, that it must have seemed strange not to have carried it out, even on the battlefield.

During the twelve years our eight children attended Bible College, they continued their family devotional time, as much as possible. At one point, five of our children attended at the same time. Now, this is going to seem like bragging here, but it’s not. I am simply trying to show you that the simpler your devotional routine is, the easier it will be for your children to continue it, once they’re away from you and your care. Our second son, Joel, and his four younger siblings would meet in the little living room where the student body would have devotions at 6:00. Joel would meet with his siblings at 5:30, and have the same type of simple routine devotions they used to have around our dining room table. It was always such a delight to their mother, when we would go up to visit with them, and we would gather before breakfast, to hear them quote the Scriptures they had learned on their own…together…routinely.

Had I concocted some weird, complicated deep theological series of lessons, they wouldn’t have known what to do. But it doesn’t take much of a spiritual giant to simply open your Bible, look at the reading schedule…there’s that boring word again…go around the table taking turns reading, go over past Scriptures learned, and repeat the new Scripture for the week, ending with a song and prayer. You can almost do that in your sleep…and Sarah did once. (Sorry, Sarah. There’s not a college student alive that won’t identify with you, Sweetheart.)

Do you think routine does away with spontaneity? Of course not. Routine paves the way for spontaneity. Have you ever walked into your kitchen to prepare a routine, ordinary breakfast of pancakes? You begin to gather the utensils and ingredients, and prepare your griddle. Suddenly, in your relaxed comfort zone, you are inspired to add blueberries, or strawberry yogurt. See what I mean? I’ll guarantee you, all the fancy recipes in your recipe book…at least in mine…start with a basic, routine, normal recipe. I have about five recipes for homemade biscuits, but guess what! They all begin with “sift dry ingredients,” or “cut in shortening until pea-size mixture forms.” From there, they may substitute buttermilk for milk, or suggest adding cheese.

I’m going to venture to make a statement here: the success of any project you will ever undertake in some way involves routine, schedule, doing the same thing over, and over, and over until it is mastered. There will be improvements made, maybe changes for the better. We stand back and analyze, and ask “why didn’t this work? This would work better.” Achievement and routine are best friends, and they walk side by side. Keep with your routine, improve if you must, but don’t get away from anything that produces happy results. And someday, I may be reading a book you wrote about your accomplishments, and the routine that got you there.

June 2010 Prayer Letter

2010-06-15T15:05:00.002-05:00

Dear friends and family,

If I had learned as much when I was young as I have been learning lately, I’d be a very smart lady. Well, in spite of my mistakes, God is still Merciful and Good to me.

During the month of May, we were honored to have hosted the Ward family, Bro. Dan and Dodi, and their two daughters, Brianna, and Chelsea and her husband, Jared Miskovic. Please pray for them, as they continue their deputation and prepare to return here to work next year. They were a blessing to our work, and to our family.

Also, my son, Tommy and his wife, Mona, and their five children should be finished with deputation by the end of this year, and we look forward to their arrival on the field during the month of December. He and Bro. Carroll Blanchard, from Temple Baptist Church, New Iberia, LA, were our guests for a week, also.

Plans are already underway for the opening of our Drug Addiction Center. A building has been rented, and there are already young men lined up to receive the benefits of this much-needed ministry. One of the leaders of this Center is a young man from our church, who was delivered from drugs about a year ago. Upon the suggestion of Pastor Luis Ramos, he received training in another city in a similar ministry, and is anxious to get started. God is Good!

On April 11, Philip, my Pastor son, baptized 11 people; most of those were family members of two of our Indian preacher boys. I have seen two ladies saved in my different ministries recently. Please continue to pray for our monthly Ladies’ Prayer Breakfasts, which are for the purpose of reaching ladies with the Gospel. This is also a time dedicated to praying for the First Ladies of our city. In every one of our Prayer Breakfasts so far, we have had in attendance different ladies representing a place of prominence. They hear their name called out, as we pray for them. This is in preparation for our Ladies’ Christmas Banquet, which will be held on November 19. At our April 28 Prayer Breakfast, a lady was saved after my lesson, and the following Sunday I was able to win another lady to the Lord. We’ve been praying for Rosario for so long, and the Lord saved her, and she and another lady I won to the Lord were baptized during the month of May. God is Good.

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 3

2010-06-11T15:08:00.002-05:00

“Give it to Me!”

I’m writing this from my living room…the room that probably holds more memories of our child rearing years than any other room in our house. Our old carpet has been replaced with beautiful tile, but if I close my eyes, I can see my children lying on that old carpet in front of our record player, some on their tummies, some propped on pillows, but all totally focused on the old 33 rpm. Is it some western story? Is it the strands of an orchestra? No, they’re listening to the classic sermon by Dr. R.G Lee, “Payday Someday.” Sometimes I think children’s imaginations were much more active in the days of records and cassette tapes. Our children grew up on “Odyssey,” and early every Saturday morning, they would pile in our bed while Daddy tuned it in on our short wave radio. Uncle Charlie followed, and by then the French toast or pancakes were ready, depending on which Saturday morning it was. But the story that captivated our older children most was the one by Dr. Lee, as only that old famous preacher could tell it.

The story came from the book of I Kings. It’s the tragic story of King Ahab, and his wicked wife, Jezebel. Ahab wanted a vineyard of herbs that belonged to Naboth. But the vineyard was an inheritance, and Naboth was forbidden to give it away, no matter that it was to the king. Ahab offered to buy it from him, or to give him another one in its place. Up until then, Ahab was in his right. But instead of honoring Naboth’s explanation, he pouted, and went home to the palace. It is my personal opinion that he made a big show of his emotions in front of his wife, because she was a manipulator. He knew she was sinister enough to get him anything he wanted, no matter that he was a wimp, and didn’t have the backbone to fight for himself. There is a similarity between Ahab and a lot of children, and even grown ups. When we don’t get what we want, we pout, or we sulk. Children should never be allowed to pout. The sooner your little one learns that all the sulking in the world won’t get her what she wants, the sooner she’ll get the message of the futility of her little shows. Sometimes, though it’s just plain ole easier to give people what they want, than to put forth a little effort to do what’s right.

The story of Ahab ends in tragedy. Jezebel consoled her pouting husband by promising that by hook or crook, she would get him Naboth’s vineyard. And she did. She ordered Naboth killed, and then soothed her coward of a husband by telling him that she had indeed gotten him the vineyard that he desired.

If you are a mother of a child two years old or older, one of the phrases you will most likely hear “from the mouth of your babe,” is “GIVE IT TO ME!” Children are born with self-centered instincts. From the moment their little head or feet enter the world, (and I’ve often wondered if they aren’t shaking those little tight fists,) they’re demanding everyone’s attention, from the hospital staff, to the one who brought them into the world, and for the next two years, from anyone within screaming distance.

That’s where we come in. We must teach our babies and little ones that there are other people in this world, and the sooner they learn that principle the happier they and everyone else around them will be. They’ll be able to adapt to society more easily. Mothers who dote over their children, and give them, and promise them anything their little hearts desire, just to have some peace and quiet while trying to do their grocery shopping, are in reality harming their little one. In the culture where I live, and where we raised our eight children, this is the norm. I’ve seen mothers standing in line in the super market, trying to man-handle a screaming two-year old, while promising her “when we get home, I’ll give you some candy.” Not only is she training that little one to scream in order to get what she wants, but she is teaching her little girl that it’s OK to lie, as long as it’s for a general good purpose…in this case, to shut up her little girl, so that those around her won’t be disturbed.

When we give children everything they want, we’re training them for life to expect others to do the same, whether in school, on the job, or in their marriage.

Even as grandmothers, we’re notorious for giving our grandchildren those things we couldn’t give their parent.

But this can also apply to us. What do you want? What do you feel is rightly yours? I’ve made a list of things that I feel are mine, things I feel I deserve. I’m doing this, because right now I feel like I’m being cheated out of a lot of things I actually need. They are:

1) MY time. I’m 66 years old. Wouldn’t you think a woman my age would have oodles of that commodity on her hands? When our children were very small, we lived in a little village. I had four children at the time, and my baby was about six months old. A very sweet couple came to spend six weeks with us in order to work with my husband, and get medical training for mission work in Colombia. We lived in a little travel trailer, so we fixed up an apartment for them in our boys’ dorm building. They would basically come over for meals, make trips to San Cristobal with us, attend services, and accompany my husband when he would go to deliver babies or stitch up machete wounds. But I was tied down to my children. It seemed like I barely had time to breathe, and often I would look longingly at my friend, who had no children, and I even ventured to tell her one day, “I can’t imagine having as much time as you do.” She bristled, and said, “Don’t think that mothers are the only ones who have a lot of work to do. I have demands on my time, too,” and then she proceeded to enumerate her various responsibilities. I did a little bristling myself, but now that I have no little ones to care for, or even a husband to cook and wash for, I can identify with my motherless friend. There are demands on my time, deadlines, and interruptions. Time is of great value to me, and sometimes to my shame, I feel myself once more bristling, as I silently scream, “GIVE IT TO ME! IT’S MINE! I’VE WORKED HARD ALL MY LIFE, AND I DESERVE SOME FREE TIME, OR AT LEAST ENOUGH TIME, OR MORE TIME!” There’s a story that our family came across many years ago. A friend gave us an old cassette tape of a missionary to, I believe, New Guinea. It’s called “The Pineapple Story.” It’s a classic, and I’ve never been the same since I heard that story. This missionary struggled to protect his pineapple field which he had planted in his back yard. He suffered trying to protect his prize possession. One day after going to several lengths to get back and fight for what was rightfully his, he decided to give his pineapple field to the Lord. He could then look out his window, and peacefully say to the Lord, as he watched the natives stealing his green pineapples which hadn’t even had time to ripen, and pray, “Lord, look what they’re doing to YOUR pineapples.” It was then that the Lord began to work not only in the missionary’s heart, but also in the hearts of the natives. He was able to teach them valuable lessons that they would never have learned had he not exchanged the concept of, GIVE THEM TO ME, for, “Lord, they belong to You.” The Lord says to me, in times of struggle to be mistress of my time, GIVE IT TO ME. It belongs to Me, anyway. It’s then, and then only that I have peace, even in times of pressure to produce more than my time allows. Even though I’m not under the pressure of meals, homework, and laundry, there are other things and people who demand my time. What a joyful peace floods my soul when I give my time to the Lord, and let Him manage it.

2) MY privacy. MY space. Now I’m going to be very, very transparent here. Sometimes I feel like unless I get up long before daylight, I won’t get to have time alone for the rest of the day. I live very close to some of my children and grandchildren. Because I’m alone now, and I have a nice four-bedroom home, which at one time was occupied by my husband and me, and our eight children, there is a tendency to continue occupying what should be, and what I deserve to be unoccupied space. I am basically always surrounded by people: my children, my grandchildren, a little Indian girl who is my housekeeper, and since my house sets right across the drive from my church, church members and Sunday school classes routinely occupy MY space. While I’m addressing mothers and grandmothers, this is a lesson everyone, including single ladies could benefit from. If you’re a college student sharing a dorm room, or if you’re sharing a room with your little sister, learn this lesson: you are going to have to condition yourself to function in a decent and orderly fashion in the midst of people, people, people, as though you were living on an island. You almost have to learn to detach yourself from your surroundings. You can do this. Did you know, I can lie down on my living room couch and go sound to sleep with five grandchildren under the age of 5 years old playing on my living room rug? I can pray in the super market, and in crowded airports. I can read my Bible while my grandchildren play (quietly, of course) on my bed. I’m writing this chapter in my living room, while my daughter is homeschooling her children. I just stopped to look at my granddaughter’s ring, and I kissed her little hand. I waved to one of our preacher boys, as he was leaving out my front gate. Do you know why? I’ve given MY privacy, and MY home to the Lord. When I got up this morning, I started praying, and I asked the Lord to give me enough peace and quiet to coherently write this lesson that has been on my heart for several weeks. And He did. Sometimes I have a sudden urge to pile all my material into my car, and drive downtown to a little coffee shop, and work to my heart’s content; or to check myself into a hotel for a couple of days in order to work in MY own space. But because I’ve given MY privacy, and MY space to the Lord, He works things together so that I can produce more, and more effectively than if I had taken things into my own hands, demanding that He GIVE IT TO ME, and worse still, demanding others to GIVE IT TO ME. When in a million years would I ever be able to teach you this valuable lesson, sitting in the quiet corner of a coffee shop, wondering if I should order more coffee, or leave an extra tip for having occupied a table for the past two hours? When you give up what you feel is rightfully yours, you’ll learn lessons you would have never learned had you demanded your rights. The Lord says, “You want your privacy? GIVE IT TO ME, and I’ll give you peace in the midst of the noise.

3) MY possessions. I have a car, and a house, and a piano, and a computer. I have a kitchen, and dishes, and a yard. I made this statement to one of my son in laws not long ago, “Possessions mean nothing to me. I’ve come to the point in my spiritual walk with the Lord where things mean absolutely nothing to me.” As if the Lord were ridiculing me, He showed me the next day how absolutely wrong I was. Things indeed do mean a lot to me. They provide security, and peace of mind. They provide comfort, and joy. Don’t deny that. Go ahead, say it with me, “I love my house; I love my collection of __________; I just love to come home at night to my __________. I just couldn’t part with my _________.” Don’t be a hypocrite. Don’t tell me, you’ve never gotten mad at your computer, and been tempted to smash the screen. If you don’t admit you are attached to certain possessions, you will never, never know the joy of giving them to the Lord. Say with the missionary, when you see someone destroying your lovely flower garden by running the lawn mower over it, “Lord, those are Your gardenias; Father, remember when we planted Your geraniums? Doesn’t it hurt You to see those beautiful rose bushes being cut down?” It feels good, like dumping a burden on Someone Else’s shoulders. More than that, you feel like you actually have Someone to commiserate with you. I never realized how much my things meant to me until someone suggested I move out of my large house, and into a small apartment. “This would not only give you more privacy, but you don’t really need a four-bedroom house.” Before I could think, I responded, “But I love my house.” This is the same person to whom I had said only a few minutes before, “Things don’t mean anything to me.” Oh, really? Then why do I love my house? While I am a believer in caring for the possessions the Lord has entrusted into our care, and we should certainly carry out the Bible teaching of being good stewards…or are we stewardesses?…of our possessions, in reality they belong to the Lord. When I grieve over things lost, or destroyed, or stolen, He says, GIVE IT TO ME. That car belongs to ME in the first place. It’s then, and then only that I can resign to the fact that they’re not mine in the first place. They already belong to HIM.

Now, it’s easy for me to give my time, my privacy, and my things to an Invisible God. That’s symbolic. I can say to the Lord, “Lord, this kitchen belongs to you.” But He’s not going to come down in bodily form, and clean up the sink full of dishes left by irresponsible people. I must find a body to wash those dishes, because they’re not heavenly. Dirty dishes are earthy in every sense of the word. I must find peace within my heart, by speaking to others, and gently asking them to clean up their mess, or by asking the Lord to give me joy as I work into the midnight hours cleaning up my treasured kitchen. When I consider my work as a ministry for the Lord, only then am I truly giving everything, dirty dishes included, to the Lord.

Do you feel like you’re being cheated by having to stay at home with your children while your husband trots off to the office every morning? The Lord says, GIVE IT TO ME…give me your resentment, give me your boredom, and I’ll give you joy, and I’ll let you have fun.

How do you feel, single mom, when you watch from your window, your neighbor as she waves good bye to her husband as he leaves for work, and then returns to her house in her robe, to leisurely care for her home, while you hurry the children to Day Care in order to get to your job on time? Don’t you feel a little bit of envy? The Lord says, GIVE IT TO ME, and I’ll give you grace and strength to be mother and father to your little ones. If YOU keep it, it will turn into bitterness, and anger and resentment. It could even end in wrecking another home, or in adultery. Is this sometimes the root of child abuse? Uncontrolled anger stemming from resentment can easily be taken out on defenseless children.

What is that sin you’re clinging to…that habit that is possessing you, or ruining your health, or your marriage, or your relationship with the Lord? He says, GIVE IT TO ME. You’ll never be able to control it. No organization in the world can break your will, or enable you to get the victory over those things you cling to for security, but that are destroying something in your life. If you give it to me, I can give you a clean heart, I can change your desires and your longings. I can satisfy your needs.

Guess what! Those children aren’t yours, did you know that? I recently told the ladies in my Sunday school class, “Those children aren’t yours, they belong to the Lord.” How easily we “give” our children to the Lord when we take them to the front of the Church when they’re newborns, and the Pastor prays a special prayer of dedication, “giving them to the Lord.” But that’s not really when we give them to Him. You give them to the Lord when you drive off and leave her standing on the college dorm sidewalk, while she is crying, and you are crying, and everybody is crying. (This is a true story.) The only way you will ever get through an experience like that is to say, “Lord, she’s Yours. You take her life, and do more with her while I’m thousands of miles away, than I could do if she were sleeping in her bedroom next to mine.” And He’ll do it. Do you have ambitions for your son? Do you have your son in law picked out? Wrong. Leave your children’s future to the Lord. Let Him plan it. Let him use your children the way He wants to use them. Train them, teach them, and protect them while they’re little. Guide them, discipline them, put hedges around them while they’re at home. But once they leave the nest, GIVE THEM TO THE LORD. Keep your hands off. They belong to the Lord in the first place. He gave them to you, and they’re not yours to keep.

Are you putting demands on others?...even on yourself?...on the Lord?

Do you have your life all planned out? Maybe you’ve even figured out your own way to go to Heaven. No, He says “GIVE IT TO ME. I have a better plan. I have a perfect plan, a way you can know for sure when you die you can go to Heaven. YOUR works? Even your good ones are as filthy rags. That’s YOUR plan, YOUR way, because it shows how good you think you are. Unless you give it up, and GIVE IT TO ME, and accept MY way, you’ll never make it to Heaven.”

“GIVE IT TO ME…your heart, your plans, your dreams, your future, your space, your time, your possessions, your children, and I WILL GIVE YOU happiness beyond your wildest dreams.”

The Missing Link

2010-05-26T02:40:00.001-05:00

“For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus;”
I Timothy 2:5

Are there people in your life who don’t get along? What can you do when you love two people who seem to hate each other?

In the Bible, the book of I Samuel 14, we find a story of a beautiful friendship between two young men, David, who was a shepherd, and Jonathan, the son of King Saul. In Chapter 18, and verse 1 the Bible tells us “that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.” From his youth, David had been anointed king of Israel by Samuel, the prophet. We won’t go into the whole story, but with the passing of time, there was a certain tension between Saul and David. In the same chapter, verse 9, Saul watched David suspiciously. In verses 6 and 7, returning from a battle, Saul heard the women singing the praises of David, because Saul had slain his thousands, but David his ten thousands.

On several occasions, Saul threatened David’s life, and tried to kill him. Jonathan was David’s best friend, but he was also the king’s son. There’s a very sad passage, where Jonathan appears to convince David that his father, the king, would never try to kill him. He wanted to “fix” the relationship between his father and his best friend. In a certain sense, Jonathan became a “mediator” between these two men whom he loved dearly. He failed. Saul was a deceiver, a liar, and a hypocrite, and once when it would have been very easy for David to have killed Saul, he saved his life instead. Saul cried, pretending to humble himself before David. But the first chance he had, he tried once more to take David’s life.

A link is one of many rings that form a chain. The dictionary uses the word “bond.” If only one link is missing, the chain loses its unity, or its bond. It’s broken. In a sense, Jonathan tried to be the missing “link” in the relationship between his father, Saul, and his best friend, David. Without a doubt, Jonathan loved both men. Perhaps he suffered, because of the enmity between the two people in his life whom he loved most. Surely he felt a great sorrow having to live between two men who couldn’t get along.

Perhaps you have two family members who don’t speak to each other. Maybe your parents are divorced. How sad when we love two people with all our hearts, who are enemies. And sorrow upon sorrow when they’re our parents! Think very hard before you even consider divorce. Think of the effect it will have on your children. Even though your children are grown, they need that security that “my parents love each other.”

What can you do when you love two people who don’t get along? Perhaps because of a problem, two of your children don’t speak to each other. Maybe two of your siblings, perhaps two of your dearest friends, can’t stand to be together. In a significant way, you can be an “intercessor,” the “missing link.” It’s possible that those two people in your life love you dearly, as you love each of them. Just as David loved Jonathan, I believe King Saul must surely have loved his son, also, although he tried to kill him once. (I Samuel 14:39) Had it not been for his being rescued by the people in verse 45, he would have killed him. Although Jonathan failed in his effort to restore the relationship between David and his father, and he was never to put that broken friendship back together, to a certain extent, he was the “missing link.”

When friendship’s chain is broken, it’s because of a missing link. And you could be that missing link. What should we do to repair a broken chain?

1. Pray for both of them. Remember, you can do a lot to help a relationship, but only God can change hearts. When two people don’t get along, it’s because there’s a problem in their hearts…in one or both. Ask God to change their hearts.

2. Ask God to show you any fault you may have in this broken chain relationship. Sometimes, we’re so close to two people that we don’t realize that we may have a negative influence. Our prayer should be like that of the Psalmist David: “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23, 24

3. As much as possible, don’t take sides. Try to remain neutral. That’s hard, because sometimes it’s obvious who has the blame. Do you find yourself in that kind of a relationship? Are there two people in your life whom you love with all your heart? They may not hate each other, but they at least show disgust toward one another. It hurts. It makes us shed tears. In broken relationships, rarely is only one party at fault. To some degree, both are responsible. But you can see the great part of the blame lies in one of the two people you love dearly. Try not to take sides against him or her. Do you know why? The chain is already broken, and you don’t want to break another one…your relationship between them and you. When you begin to take sides, you risk damaging the relationship you have with one of them.

4. Sometimes, when we’re with the person who seems to be the innocent victim of a broken chain, there is a temptation to speak badly of the guilty one. Gossip, criticizing someone is a sin, and even worse when you are criticizing their enemy. That makes the situation worse, and you, who should be the strongest link, instead of repairing the chain, are making it even weaker. Watch your mouth, especially when you’re in the presence of one of your loved ones.

The Bible teaches that when a person rejects Christ, she’s an enemy of God. There’s like a breach, a gulf between the two. Ezekiel 22:30 says, “And I sought for a man among them that should make up the hedge, and stand in the gap before me for the land, that I should not destroy it: but I found none.”

Jesus loves us. He loves His Father, and when He sees that the relationship between two people that He loves is broken, it makes Him sad. The Bible says in I Timothy 2:5 “For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus;”

There is only one Person Who can “fix” the relationship between God and the sinner…Jesus Christ. There’s no one else. There is absolutely nothing we can do to deserve God’s love. It’s all by grace. “For by grace are ye saved through faith;…Not of works,…” Ephesians 2:8,9 You may think you have no enemies, but if you don’t have an intimate relationship with God, you’re enemies. Remember, Jesus not only wants to be our Friend, He paid the price so that you could have His Father as your best Friend.

With my youngest grandbaby, Elisa

2010-05-13T14:52:00.003-05:00

Me with Elisa Faith Knabb, daughter of Jason and Sarah, missionaries to Vera Cruz, Mexico

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 2

2010-05-08T16:01:00.001-05:00

“Falling in Love” or “When Mama Ain’t Happy”

Now, some of the titles for this book may seem a little strange to you and totally unrelated to life with my children. This book is about what I learned from them. One of the great lessons of my life has been that I affect those around me. My mood swings, my disposition, my attitude all affect not only my children, but the people with whom I live and work.

This is valuable knowledge in living a happy life, whether you’re raising children, flowers, or chickens. If you believe you’re an island, you’re going to have a hard time raising children…at least happy ones.

Did you know God saw the importance of “atmosphere” when He created the earth? It was “without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep.” So the first thing He did was to create light. He could have made us in such a way that we could have moved about in total darkness if He had wanted to. But He made light so we could enjoy the beautiful flowers He intended to make. He made night, so we would feel drowsy in front of a cozy fire, and He also made night for romance. Didn’t He? Yes, He did. Romancing with your Sweetie takes on a dreamy dimension at night…candlelight, soft music…Don’t you ever think about why God did what He did in the beginning? Or do I have an over-active imagination? I don’t think so.

The memory of the atmosphere we create in our home is going to stay with our children for the rest of their lives. Their disposition and their temperament largely depend on the atmosphere at home. We’re taught, and I agree, that children are born with certain “bends.” In a family of say, eight children, for instance, all raised in the same atmosphere, same parents, same night time routine, one child will be easy-going and always happy. Who cares that not everyone loves him. He is going to love you, and get along with you. Sleeping in the bedroom next to him will be a little girl who has fought her entire way through the day. She loves the challenge of keeping everyone in line. She doesn’t really care how many enemies she makes during the day, just so by bedtime she’s been able to get at least one sibling in line, with as much punishment as possible.

But at least from my experience, when children grow up in an orderly household, where Mama is happy, usually everybody else is, too. And if she ain’t…neither is anyone else.

So what does “falling in love” have to do with anything? I pray this prayer for several of my children every morning: “Help _______ and _______ to fall in love with ________ and to love it more than any other place on earth.” Because if they don’t, neither will their children. Their children will grow up hating the place where God has called them.

I say this from experience. I literally hated San Cristóbal when we moved here thirty-eight years ago. I won’t even be pious and say like I have in the past, “but as I got to know the people, I began to fall in love with San Cristóbal,” because that’s not really true. I’m not talking about people…I’m talking about places. I’m talking about the place where you are right now. Maybe you’re lying in a hospital bed; maybe you have to cook dinner from a wheel chair, or in a hot steamy kitchen. Ask the Lord to help you to fall in love with where you live.

I can still remember the almost eerie feeling of walking the streets of San Cristóbal when we first arrived. There were no flowers in the yards, or at least if there were, they were not visible from the sidewalks, because San Cristóbal is a colonial town, and everything is gray, and concrete…that was my first impression. Gloom, adobe walls, narrow streets, ugly, ugly, ugly everywhere you looked. That was in February, 1972. Thirty-eight years later, the streets are still narrow, the walls still hide what could possibly be lovely gardens, and the sound, almost like a castle-echo, is what you hear if you walk down the streets this afternoon. So what has changed? I have changed. Not even the people have changed. They’re still very “Coletos,” a term applied to people from this little mountain village. No, the one who has changed is me…or is I…or am I, to be grammatically correct.

I love my town more than any other town on earth. The climate is an average 72 degrees. I live on the outskirts of town, but it’s still noisy, with street vendors, and occasional religious parades, and water trucks that sell my bottled water. I love sitting in my bedroom with the drapes drawn before daylight, and knowing exactly when to turn off my porch light, because the birds start singing at precisely dawn.

No place on earth can compare to my town. I wasn’t born here, and I didn’t grow up here, and I’ll guarantee you, it wasn’t love at first sight. It was a gradual falling in love.

I don’t know if my children were old enough to feel my hatred for this town years ago. They may not have known what made me cranky, or critical, or crabby. But I was, because I lived for the day when we would make cross-country trips from southern México where San Cristóbal is located, to the United States. And I’m ashamed to admit the thoughts I used to have about never coming back.

In my book, Tom and Me, there is a chapter called “I Stayed.” I don’t know where you are, but if you don’t love the place where you are, more than any other place on earth, the only way you’re going to “fall in love” with it is to stay there. Stay put. Know how you do that? You don’t leave.

I’m afraid our children are growing up to hate the place where they live, simply because we don’t make it a happy place.

I don’t know what circumstances are making you unhappy with your surroundings, but you can make it very pleasant and a happy place for your children.

So if it isn’t the people that make a place happy, what is it? I say it’s the memories. We’ve made memories with our children in the most desolate situations, in the unhappiest times of our lives. I remember the time Anna was only two months old, and we were returning home from the States. We had a bad wreck, and our pickup and travel trailer turned over. Miraculously we survived. By then we had five children, and the trailer was actually our home. But some of the most precious memories I hold dear to my heart are those made that week in the hotel room where we stayed while our insurance company was settling with the man who caused the accident. With a family of seven, including a baby, you can imagine the laundry…and no laundromat! I laughed until my side hurt at the sight of my husband “changing cycles” as he washed clothes in the bath tub…from gentle to spin to regular to rinse…how the children laughed as Daddy did the laundry.

The scary moments?...the terrifying feeling of reliving every moment of the wreck…yes, they were there. But what I remember most was the picnic down at the river, making new friends at the hotel, hanging my laundry out on the hotel roof, and using the closet shelves as kitchen storage. Like falling in love in a romantic atmosphere, precious memories are what make for a life long love affair with the place where God has put us.

There’s a divine element in falling in love. Worldly love affairs are all about the physical. But true love from God is more about the spirit, that nameless, indescribable attraction toward the one we truly love. If you leave God out of the picture, and out of your life, I don’t know how you make sense of anything in the first place. That’s what tears families apart…looking for that perfect town, that perfect job, or school, or church, even, can create an unrest, a dissatisfaction not only in us, but in our children as well.

Whether it’s peanut butter sandwiches under a shade tree in the back yard, or reading to our children, or playing games, you can make some happy memories. When you’re not happy, neither are your children. Fall in love with the place God has chosen for you to live. And so will your children.

Armando and Marco Antonio's story

2010-04-24T15:15:00.005-05:00

A Guest Post, by my daughter Anna

The first 6 people who were baptized April 11th are from a family whose two oldest sons (Armando and Marco) came to live in the boys' home here about 3 years ago. Armando and Marco were saved after they came to live here; they have now started a mission in their village about an hour away from San Cristóbal. It was a blessing to see their Daddy and Mama and 4 younger brothers be baptized! Here is their story:

Armando (with his baby brother, the one smiling) and Marco Antonio (the one on the far left), standing behind his Mama, holding the towels. Here they are actually watching Daddy get baptized, and Mama is waiting to be baptized.

Andrew (my husband) and I went to visit their village and the mission being started a couple of weeks ago. That family is SO poor! (They have 8 children. The youngest is 2.) My heart was really touched. They barely had enough to feed us, but they are SO happy! (I have been getting a bag of clothes together to send to them for the children. They have one little girl who is 4 years old so I will give the dresses that my Deborah has out-grown to her.) When we went to camp with the boys last week (Armando, Marco Antonio, Juan Carlos, and Julio), Andrew and I watched them. Well bless your heart, they were in "heaven" there compared to what accommodations they have at home! I told Andrew, "These boys sure won't complain about the camp food or their camp bed! They even get to use a bathroom here!"

Armando and Marco Antonio's family is very musically talented. They told us about when they were only about 10 and 12 years old, they belonged to a singing group that an adult cousin of theirs organized. He said they were invited to parties and special events all the time to sing, and they were paid for their time. Their dad got saved around that time...some Presbyterians won him and his wife to the Lord, I think--and Marco Antonio said that was right when they began getting invitations even to sing and play in Guatemala! He said for a couple of Indian boys, that was big money! Their dad told them they had to stop playing and singing with that group. Well, they didn't want to because they liked earning money. So their dad said, "You either drop out of the group or you have to leave home." So they dropped out of the group.

About 3 years later, Armando came to live in the boys' home here; he got saved soon after that, and then went home and won Marco Antonio to the Lord, who about one year later also came to live here. Those boys are so sweet! Marco Antonio plays the guitar so beautifully! My brother Tommy said in December, "That boy rides circles around me." Now that is a compliment, coming from Tommy who plays more than 30 instruments!

Anyway, they use their talents for the Lord now. They have formed a singing group with some of the other boys here in the church, and my, they sound good together! They are now being invited to Christian events all over to sing. The Lord is blessing their decision to give their talents to Him!

Isn't that just a wonderful story?! Juan Carlos, their younger brother who was baptized, will be leaving home soon to come to San Cristóbal to study, Lord willing, and will become a part of our church. He is just about as musically talented on the guitar as is Marco Antonio.

Youth meeting here just dismissed, and I can hear Marco Antonio playing his guitar out in the church building. It sounds so beautiful!

--Anna

P.S. I forgot to take our camera that day that we went to La Floresta (where the mission has been started in these boys' village); but Andrew has a camera on his cell phone. Well, we were just fixing to start the service, and a donkey walked right in to church. Bless your heart, he was coming to the service! It was so funny! You know how here they greet with a kiss on the cheek? Andrew told the preacher that day, "Ah, look, Bro. Rodolfo. He wants you to greet him with a kiss! Now don't offend your members! You'd better greet him!" Ahh!!! We are all rolling! It was SO funny! (Andrew got some pictures of that donkey in the church!)

Baptisms

2010-04-22T16:09:00.006-05:00

A Guest Post, by my daughter Anna

On Sunday night, April 11th, eleven people were baptized after our PM service. It was such a blessing to see these precious people follow the Lord in this step of obedience. I am attaching some photos so you can see. I hope it causes your heart to rejoice as it did ours. Have a wonderful day!

--Anna

The first 6 people who were baptized are from a family whose two oldest sons (Armando and Marco) came to live in the boys' home here about 3 years ago. Armando and Marco were saved after they came to live here; they have now started a mission in their village about an hour away from San Cristóbal. It was a blessing to see their Daddy and Mama and 4 younger brothers be baptized!

Armando's DaddyArmando's MamaArmando's brother, Juan CarlosArmando's brother, JulioArmando's brother, PedroArmando's brother, Rosendo (when Philip asked him, "Rosendo, have you been saved?" He answered, "Amen!" It was so precious!)Bethsaida, the daughter of a man whose family has only been coming for about one monthJuan, the son of a single mother who comes to our church (Zaremi's younger brother). Juan was saved at camp.Abelardo, who was also saved at campOsmar, a young man who was saved about two months ago. Marisol...precious girl in our youth group.The congregation looking on

April 2010 Prayer Letter

2010-04-19T15:22:00.000-05:00

Dear Friends and Family,

I trust the past two months have been blessed ones for you. Among my countless blessings, the Lord sent me a precious granddaughter, Elisa (pronounced E-lee-sa) Faith Knabb, born to Jason and Sarah on February 6.

The months of February and March were spent away from my lovely mountain home in San Cristobal, Chiapas. After leaving Jason and Sarah in Jáltipan, Veracruz, I traveled with my son, Philip and his wife, Liz to Querétaro, where Steve and Ruthie Miller (my daughter) and their five children serve as missionaries. Then on to the Mount Hebron Ministries south of Monterrey, where I was privileged to speak in several of the ladies’ sessions of the annual Fires of Evangelism Conference, February 15-18. After leaving Monterrey, I crossed the US border, drove to Decatur, TX, and on the 22th I flew to El Paso, TX, and spent two weeks with my son, Joel, and his wife Margaret and their two little girls. I got to be with them for their church’s 10th Anniversary Conference. During my visit there, I spoke six times, including a senior citizen group.

During my stay in the States, I got to visit my home church in Oklahoma City, and spend time with precious friends. I also enjoyed speaking to the college ladies in the OBC split chapel. Since February 1, I’ve spoken twelve times.

Before returning home, I spent two weeks with Steve and Ruthie, and enjoyed attending their church’s 6th Anniversary Conference.

If you have access to the Internet, I invite you to join me in the writing of my new book, My Kids and Me. “From the Heart of Mexico” can be found at www.mimitomany.blogspot.com I’m indebted to my daughter in law, Jolene, for her encouragement, and actual posting of my entries, and pray that even before this book is published, it can be a blessing to ladies…especially mothers and grandmothers. This is a result of a meeting with my former pastor, Dr. Jim Vineyard, who the day after my husband’s funeral, urged me to engage in a writing ministry; I did, and I love it. What a blessed lady I am!

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

MY KIDS AND ME - Chapter 1

2010-04-05T15:05:00.000-05:00

“I Don’t Think I Can Do This!”

I had been married for about three months, when my doctor husband returned home from the hospital with the news that normally the expectant mother gives to the expectant father: “We’re going to have a baby.” I had been experiencing suspicious symptoms, so Tom took my…well, you know…to the hospital lab to be tested, and sure enough…there was a baby in there!...not really, but you know what I mean.

My husband, Tom, was finishing his General Practice residency in Lafayette, Louisiana. Those were the days when life holds all your dreams: we were passionately-in-love newlyweds; we were excited about leaving for the mission field of Mexico in a few months, and now the joy of looking forward to having a baby. Life didn’t get better than this…

…until that fatal day…

Always the planner, I had decided to be not only the world’s best mother with the world’s best children, but I also planned to have the perfect delivery. I was young and healthy. I was married to a physician. And I was also a scaredy cat…with a very low pain tolerance level.

Upon my insistence, my doctor husband brought home an armload of little pamphlets that he would give to his mommies-to-be. I was so excited I could hardly breathe and couldn’t wait until I got my hands on them: my guide to perfection.

And then I saw the explicit illustrations and drawings of a child actually coming into the world. It was with horror that I announced to my husband when he came in for lunch that day: “I don’t think I can do this.”

“Of course, you can,” he said simply, as he usually expressed everything he said. I was the “embellisher,” as he called me. He was the “simplifier,” so he added, “Millions of women all over the world have had babies, down through the centuries, and so can you. And besides, you don’t have an option.”

Well, thanks a lot for the encouragement!

That was exactly forty years ago. And as I look back over all those years of mothering eight children, I still remember times, much more challenging than labor of childbirth. It’s those days when you feel like you did everything wrong. The “why did I do that?...why didn’t I do that?” The feeling of having sped through my day, and running right past my children. The tears shed over things I’d said to them…or things I didn’t say.

Neglect…thoughtlessness…cruelty…abandonment…failure…these aren’t the confessions of a physically abusive mom. They’re the devastating thoughts of a mother who adored her children, and wouldn’t for anything in the world have done anything to hurt them.

Why this feeling of total inadequacies? You’re reading this, and you’re feeling this with me. Yes you are. This describes you perfectly, doesn’t it? You’re about ready to throw in the towel, and you’re not too particular whose head it lands on. You just want out! Or maybe you want help.

Looking back over those years when my children were still at home, I believe those feelings came to me, as they do to you because of several things:

I was looking inward, and not upward. I read my Bible faithfully every single morning…or at least at some point during the day. When my oldest child was four months old, I started reading the Bible through, and I’ve just finished reading it through for the 39th time. I faithfully had Bible reading with my children every morning. But somehow, that Bible-glow gets dimmer and dimmer as the day grows to an end. The challenge becomes the obstacle, the ever-present hill to be climbed. One tends to think of self more at the end of the day, instead of being happy with one’s role in life, and God’s plan for him or her. Funny, it was always at the end of the day when I would get those feelings. The devil attacks us when we are most vulnerable: when we’ve had it with our children…when we’re tired…when a little one is sick, or doesn’t understand a math problem. It’s at that point that the devil shows us how utterly incapable we are as mothers. And we are, but for the Lord’s grace and strength. Don’t ever say or think you are incapable of doing something that God has called you to do. Your role as mother is as much a ministry as the role of your Pastor’s ministry. You are the best mother God could have chosen for your children. You are tailor-made for them. Even if your little ones are adopted, God put them under your care for a purpose. He allowed you to choose them. There was something about that little one that reached out and touched your motherless heart, and said, “She’s the one,” or “Pick him.” There is a confidence that must come in doing anything for the Lord. But it’s not confidence in one’s own ability. It comes from knowing that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. So the next time you have those desperately unfit mom feelings, look to the One who gave you these little ones. You’re not unfit. You’re tailor-made. Take your eyes off yourself, and your failures and shortcomings, and look to Him for your strength.
I was looking outward, and not upward. If you think I was nuts for studying how to have a baby, you should have seen my library once I actually had a baby! I read everything I could get my hands on about mothering. Just like you! You’re reading this book, because you think I have it altogether. I’ve raised eight children, and you want to know how I survived. This book is not about child raising. It’s a book written to encourage parents, and especially mothers and grandmothers. I would read those books, and about half way through the first chapter, I would already be discouraged. I didn’t have children like this typical suburban housewife. I would daydream about her, and fantasize about being like her. I would lovingly discipline, and I would be a nurturer. I would never get angry or upset. But in reality, in real life, I wasn’t that way, and I couldn’t handle the pressures. What I didn’t know is that most of those mom-authors couldn’t either. I believe those books must surely be written by mothers who have their standards so high, that not even Susannah Wesley herself could have attained to such high goals. Then one day, I closed all my books, and realized my limitations. I turned to the Lord, and I said, “Lord, you know I want to be a good mother. I’d even love to be perfect, just like You. But I can’t. So will You please take all my imperfections, knowing me like You know me, turn them around and use them to help me raise these children? I can’t do it in my strength, so I ask for Yours. I look to Your Word for guidance.”
I was comparing myself to others, instead of to the Lord. You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? I “hear” that smile. I had two friends whom I thought had to be model moms. They were everything I was not. Their children always were immaculately dressed, had impeccable manners, and always had their shoes on. In the area of academics, theirs far excelled mine. We were all home schooling, missionary moms, and they were always talking about the wonderful grades their children made. Their houses were much nicer than mine, and they never had one single dirty dish in the sink. Funny how when you start comparing “apples to apples,” oranges start to appear, too. We’re talking children here, not houses. But even their clothes, their vehicles, their ministries…oops!...their husbands seemed to have it altogether. I say this from experience, and with authority: this is a work of the devil. Don’t ever, ever compare yourself, your children, your house, your church to those of others. This will only accomplish one of two results: you will be puffy with pride, or you will be desperately discouraged. God made you on purpose. He made you inside out. He gave you your husband, your children, your church. He made your body like He wanted it to be. He knows your weaknesses, but He also knows your strengths. Stop “accentuating the negative,” and start “accentuating the positive.” Take what you have, where you are. Accept who you are, and stop comparing. Only when I compare myself to the Lord, and strive to become like Him, will I ever become who He wants me to be. He doesn’t want you to be like me. He didn’t want me to be like Ginny or Sandy. He didn’t want them to be like me. Only when I accept who I am, can He make me to be like Him. Accept your husband. Accept your children, and thank God for the way He made them. Don’t try to change them. Train your children for the Lord. Don’t train them to be preachers, or missionaries, or doctors, or businessmen. Train them for the Lord, for Him to do with them as He wills. Get your eyes off others, and back on the Lord.

Some mothers look at child rearing like some people look at Salvation. Salvation is by grace. And so is childrearing. Did you know if there were something good you could do to take you to Heaven, there would be the corresponding something bad to condemn you to hell? Salvation is by grace, through faith in Jesus Christ. I witness to people all the time who don’t like this. They want to think there is surely something they can do to take them to Heaven. That’s why you’re ready to throw in the towel. You’re saved, but some of the things you do give the devil opportunity to make you think you’ve “lost” your Salvation, or you haven’t been good enough. There is nothing good enough you can do to take you to Heaven. If you are going to Heaven, it is all by grace, and through faith in Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross.

That’s the way it is with mothering. Just as there is an element of pride of wanting to “do something on my own” that will merit Heaven for me, there is a pride element in thinking, “I don’t think I can do this,” when it comes to mothering. Of course, you can’t. Of course I couldn’t. It is all through grace that our children grow up to love and serve the Lord. It doesn’t all depend on you. I didn’t have little Joel’s destiny in my hands. I didn’t do all the blotching in his life. Stop being so proud that you can’t admit that you CAN raise that child to serve the Lord, you CAN be a good mother, you ARE the best mother that child could possibly have. If you’re drunk, or if you’re a druggie, I don’t know why you would be reading this book. But if you are, God didn’t mean for you to mess up your life. But neither did He kill you, so He must surely have a purpose for leaving you here. If you still have little ones at home, get up! Pour all your alcoholic beverages, and your drugs down the toilet. If you don’t know anyone who can show you how to get saved, and be a good mother, just tell the Lord, “Lord, I’m lost. I’m a sinner. I’m on my way to hell. Save me from my sins, from my drugs, and from everything bad in my life. Forgive me for hurting You. I believe your Son, Jesus died on the cross for my sins. I accept Him, and ask Him to make me to be everything You would have me to be. Help me to raise these children to love You and serve You all the days of their lives. I take You into my heart, into my life, and into my home. In Jesus’ name. Amen.” If you pray that prayer, and mean it with all your heart, He’ll hear you, and He’ll give you grace to be the kind of mother your children need you to be. The Holy Spirit lives in you, and He will direct you as you lovingly raise your children.

Don’t think you can do this? Well, you can’t. I had no more power over not having a baby than you have over training yours in the ways of the Lord. Just as my body performed its natural function in childbirth, so you must let the Holy Spirit direct your thoughts, your desires, your goals, your actions to “bring forth” children who love and serve the Lord. This should be your ultimate goal: producing and rearing children who mature spiritually, sufficiently to love and serve the Lord in whatever capacity He wants to use them.

I think you can do this!

I Have Enough

2010-03-28T13:46:00.002-06:00

“And Esau said, I have enough, my brother;…”

A couple of weeks ago, I was staying in the home of some members of my church in Oklahoma. They leave early to go to work, and the lady assured me that I could enjoy the peace and quiet of their home all morning. I didn’t have to leave until noon, and I was relaxed, and looking forward to a long morning alone. At 8:45 my phone rang. “Mrs. Sloan.” It was the sweet voice of our Canadian secretary. “Would you be able to come and teach our Bible college girls during split chapel? It starts at 10:00.” Now my friends’ house is a thirty-five minute drive from our church. I wasn’t dressed. I hadn’t fixed my hair. I get up early and shower, but I like to spend time praying and reading my Bible before I get ready for the day. I couldn’t believe my ears, when I replied: “Of course, I’ll try to be on time.” When I hung up, I thought, “What am I going to teach? How on earth will I get out the door on time?” This lesson came to my mind, and I decided to put it into practice. I began to say to myself, “I have enough time. I have enough time. I have enough time.”

The story of Jacob and Esau is one of the saddest stories in the Bible. It’s a story of deception. But one of these twins, Esau, taught me a lesson that I’d like to share with you…the same lesson I taught those young ladies in chapel. Jacob and Esau were twin sons of Isaac and Rebekah. Esau was the older. The birthright belonged to him…the special inheritance from his father. But one day when Esau returned from the field, he was very hungry. In a moment of weakness, he made a rash decision: he sold his birthright to his brother for a bowl of pottage (stew). Jacob took advantage of his brother. Genesis 25:27-34.

On another occasion, Jacob deceived his brother, when he stole the blessing of their father that rightly belonged to Esau. If you read the sad story in Genesis 27:1-40, you’ll see how Rebekah helped Jacob deceive his father. And in verses 41-46, Jacob runs away from his brother for fear that he would kill him, once Isaac died.

We can observe so many things in this story…the preference of one son over the other. Jacob was the favorite of his mother, Rebekah, and Isaac’s favorite was Esau.

In verse 41, we’re told that these brothers even hated each other.

But in Genesis 31:3, our story takes a turn. God told Jacob to return to the land of his father. After many years, there would be an encounter between these two brothers. Jacob feared Esau would take revenge, and he took several measures of precaution. Sin gives us a guilt complex. Jacob knew he had sinned against his brother twice. Besides taking precaution, Jacob also prepared presents for his brother. In chapter 33, when Esau saw all the animals, he said, “What do all these presents mean?” Jacob responded, “I hope to find grace in your eyes.” Jacob wanted to make up for all his deceit and wrong toward his brother with animals. But that wasn’t possible. What was Esau’s reaction? Did he get angry? Did he try to kill his brother?

I’m not sure if we should use Esau as an example, but at least on this occasion, he responded in a very noble fashion. He told his brother in verse 9, “I have enough.” And Esau’s response to his brother Jacob, inspired me, and I thought, “I also have enough. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.”

1. I have enough money. I never thought the day would come when I could say, “I have enough money.” When I think of all the things I can’t do, and all the things I don’t have, it doesn’t seem like I have enough money. But according to Philippians 4:19, if I don’t have something because of the lack of money, it’s because I don’t need it. “But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” I have been a widow now for over five years. Many times since then, I’ve had to make decisions that I didn’t have to make when my husband was here. One of those decisions had to do with money, our purchases. Now that he’s gone, I’m the one who has to decide how I’m going to spend my money, after taking care of my commitments to the Lord, and paying my bills. I’ve found a wonderful rule for the use of my money: when I think I need something, and I’ve asked God for direction, if He doesn’t supply the money, obviously I don’t need it, according to Philippians 4:19. If God doesn’t supply it, I don’t need it. Strange, but the lack of money has been a blessing to me. It’s my guide. Thank the Lord, I have all the money I need. If I don’t have it, I don’t need it.

2. I have enough time. The next time you feel pressured for time, do what I’ve learned to do, and what I did that morning when I had little time to get ready to teach those young ladies. Repeat this phrase, “I have enough time; I have enough time.” That morning, I told the Lord, “Father, You know I got up early, and I was looking forward to a morning alone with You, studying and working. You knew what was in store for me today. I always give You my day every morning. Now, You provide the time I need.” And He did. I arrived at 10:05, while they were still singing, and I enjoyed a wonderful time teaching those girls how God provides time for everything, like He says in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

3. I have enough strength. I’m going to share with you an application that I’ve learned from Isaiah 40:31. “But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” So why do we get tired? Why is it that sometimes we don’t want to get up in the morning, after a sleepless night when we’ve been up with a baby? I believe the comfort of this verse, the key comes from the words, “they that WAIT upon the Lord.” The fact that you got up means you had the strength to put your feet on the floor. That’s all the strength you needed to get up. You don’t need strength to fix breakfast until you get to the kitchen. But before you get up, you’re already in the kitchen, when the Lord is still beside your bed. Don’t get ahead of Him. WAIT on the Lord. Walk WITH Him, at His pace. This past month, I’ve done a lot of traveling. I’ve spent many hours alone. I’ve driven hundreds of miles in my car, and at times I’ve thought, “Lord, I don’t think I can lug my luggage (so that’s where we get that word!) from my car one more time. I don’t think I can pump one more drop of gas into my car.” I’m already at the hotel, when the Lord is still traveling; He’s just giving me the strength to sit behind the wheel and stay awake, and to enjoy fellowshipping with Him. I’m already fifty miles down the road at a gas station, when He’s enjoying time alone with me.” And He says, “Wait for Me. I’m not giving you strength to do something you don’t need to do now.” This is a precious truth that I’ve learned these past few weeks, and it’s changed my life. It gives me rest when I’m tired, because I have enough strength…to do what I have to do moment by moment.

4. I have enough wisdom. James 1:5 says, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” I believe we could apply to all these verses this principle: “If I don’t have it, I don’t need it.” Last week, I felt like I needed to make a decision. I didn’t know what to do. So I asked God to give me wisdom to make the right decision. He didn’t do it. Know what I did? Nothing. I didn’t do anything. My husband always said, “If you don’t know what to do, don’t do anything.” And I took his advice. God gave me the wisdom to decide to do nothing. I didn’t do anything. If we would only learn to live according to this principle: “I have enough,” it would help us to make right decisions: You don’t have enough time to do something? You don’t have to do it. You don’t have enough money to buy something? You can live without it. You don’t have the strength to wash the dinner dishes? Go to bed. Simple. Most of the mistakes we make we make because we buy things we can’t afford…we work beyond the strength God gives us, in our own strength, in the flesh. We make decisions without the wisdom God gives us, like Esau did when he sold his birthright. If you lack wisdom, ask God for it. If He doesn’t give it to you liberally, you don’t need it. Give your pretty little head a rest, my friend.

5. I have enough grace. “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” Do you know what’s wrong with us women? We worry too much. We can’t sleep, for thinking about what’s going to happen tomorrow…or what’s not going to happen tomorrow. I’m telling you this, because it happens to me all the time. “What if I don’t make it to my plane on time? What if my plane is delayed, and I don’t make my connection? What will I say if the pastor asks me to give my testimony? Will I faint? Who’ll call my children? Which one of the eight will come for me?” Guess what! I’ve found myself in all those situations, and God gave me grace to go through them all. I’ve never fainted while giving my testimony, and God gave me a lovely place to stay when my flight was canceled in New York City…in the Holiday Inn, and although I slept in the lobby, I slept, and God protected me. Last night when I went to bed, I knew that today held an enormous challenge for me. You know why? Were they going to amputate my leg? No. Did I have an appointment at the White House? No. Was I going to be thrown into a den of lions? No. My son in law asked me keep their four children while he and my daughter went out. Now, my husband and I raised eight children. I loved being a mother, washing clothes, and dirty faces, and dishes. But now that those children have children, the biggest challenge I face comes when I’m asked to baby sit my grandchildren. I knew my daughter really needed some time away from the children, so I answered, “Sure, I’d be glad to stay with them.” Did I say glad? This morning when I woke up, the first thought that entered my sleepy mind was, “You’re keeping your grandchildren today…four of them…ALL day. Go back to sleep. Don’t get up until they come and pull you out of bed.” It is now 6:00 in the evening, and guess what! I have spent a wonderful day with my grandchildren. I’ve laughed until my side hurt, and my granddaughters and I learned a lesson in forgiveness, and I’ve hugged and kissed I don’t know how many times. And those little ones that God gave to my children have been a blessing beyond words to me. They even helped me with this lesson. I know this sounds ugly, but God gave me the grace to care for my grandchildren today. I didn’t need that grace last night, or when I woke up this morning. And God didn’t give it to me. But when my children drove out of the gate to spend a special day together, at that moment, God gave me the grace to spend an unforgettable day with my grandchildren. If you’re an older person, you probably spend at least a little time wondering about your death. “Will I die of a terminal illness? Will someone have to take care of me, like I used to take care of my babies? Will my insurance take care of my medical expenses..or my burial?” I don’t know the answer to all those questions. But I’m sure of one thing: God will give me the grace to die when that time comes. I’m one hundred percent sure that when I die, I’ll go to Heaven. If you’ve never accepted Christ as your Savior you have a reason to worry. Grace is for those of us who have put our trust only in the Lord to take us to Heaven. A few weeks ago, I told a dear lady, “Not one of my good works can take me to Heaven; but neither can one of my sins condemn me to hell, since I accepted Jesus as my Savior 58 years ago.” I can rest, and enjoy the life God has given me, because I know one day when He calls me into His presence, He’ll give me grace enough to die. Oh, and I also have enough grace to enjoy an abundant life.

What do you need? Patience? Courage? Power over some sin? Victory over temptation? I’m going to assign you some homework: Look up passages in the Bible that promise you enough…enough patience, enough courage, enough power over your sin, enough victory over temptation. And when you’re through, and as you put into practice this principle: “I have enough,” you’ll renew your strength; you’ll mount up with wings as eagles. You’ll run and not be weary, and you’ll walk and not faint, because He is Sufficient.

MY KIDS AND ME (preface)

2010-03-16T15:19:00.002-06:00

A book in the making, entitled "My Kids and Me" that I will be sharing with you as I write...

I am not a mother goat, so my children are not kids. I never like to refer to the eight precious children the Lord gave my husband and me, as kids. But for the sake of title, I’ll use that term.

Strangely enough, this story starts with the birth of my second child, Joel. It must have been the day after his birth. I remember the nurse handing him to me, and this thought came to me: “He’s so perfect. The only blotch he will ever have will be put there by me.”

Of course, that wasn’t true then, and it’s not true now: he wasn’t perfect, and I would not be the only blotcher in his life.

What is this innate quality that we mothers are “born” with…the day our first child is born? This paranoia of having the destiny of our child, and hence the destiny of mankind in our hands? Why this feeling of needing to be perfect?...everything from bath time schedules to feeding techniques to story-telling time. If everything doesn’t go on schedule and exactly right, he might not turn out to be the person he was destined to be.

When I use the pronoun, he, I use it in the generic sense, because I also have four girls, as well as four boys.

I am fixing to celebrate my 39th Mother’s Day, and I will, as I do every year, evaluate my performance of the past year. Where did I go wrong? What did I do right? What do I need to change?

So I think the purpose of this book, is not to flaunt my abilities as a mother, and certainly not to flaunt my children. Sinners have no business flaunting in the first place, because sin is a shame.

The purpose of this book is to encourage mothers like me. I’m well past the training era in my life. I have four daughters in law, and four sons in law. They, too, have already been trained. This book is written, not only for them and for all the young parents in the world, but it’s written for the grandmothers, to whom God has given a second chance. While looking back over my parenting days, I can apply the experience of my shortcomings toward my grandparenting days.

I will neither expose the shortcomings of my children in this book, nor display their virtues and talents. Without doing either, I will, to the best of my ability, look back over the years shared with my husband, the years when we were in our twenties and thirties with all our brood still at home. I will try to draw out memories of their teen years, their college years, their “moving on with their lives” years.

Even the valleys to be crossed, the dark nights…sleepless nights of not knowing where that child was, nights that required complete trust in Him Who only could care for him…to the fun filled times, the financially grueling times, which bring back vivid memories of a big jar of Welch’s grape jam.

There were sad times we all went through, which bound us together as nothing else but tragedy can. All these are wrapped together between the covers of this book, like we would snuggle beneath the covers of our warm bed when Daddy was still here, and read a book, or listen to our shortwave radio.

So as I start out on this second journey of writing a book, I do so, not with the thought that “if I did it, you can do it,” but with the assurance that even if I didn’t do it, you can still do it…even better than I did.

The town where I live in Chiapas, Mexico: "San Cristobal de las Casas"

2010-03-05T15:53:00.003-06:00

My church in Chiapas

2010-03-02T16:57:00.000-06:00

Steve and Ruthie's children

2010-02-28T01:07:00.001-06:00

Stephen, Abigail, Elisabeth, Benjamin, and Levi

My 31st Grandbaby

2010-02-14T01:01:00.001-06:00

Introducing:

Elisa Faith Knabb

Born: Saturday, February 6, 2010 at 10:50am

Weight: 6.2 pounds

Born to: Jason and Sarah, my daughter and son-in-law

Condition: perfect!

February Prayer Letter

2010-02-07T14:40:00.000-06:00

Dear Friends of México,

I am a missionary. In fact, it’s hard for me to remember life before my missionary days. I’d rather be a missionary than anything else in this world. I know that’s why you’re reading this report...you’re interested in missions. But you’ll have to excuse me this morning…I’m having a “Mimi Moment.” I’m sitting in a hospital room in Jáltipan, Veracruz. My daughter, Sarah, and her husband, Jason Knabb, just went into surgery. She is to deliver little Elisa Faith in a few minutes by C-Section. In fact, if she arrives by the time I finish this letter, I’ll let you know. 14 years ago today, my first granddaughter, Joanna was born…the first of what will be 31 grand-treasures in a few minutes.

I wish you could hear all the things my son, Philip has planned for the future of our church in San Cristóbal. I enjoy watching the excitement of the people, as they are already getting involved in the preparations for the opening of the orphanage God has laid on Philip’s heart. His enthusiasm is certainly contagious, and even as I write, the legal permission will soon be acquired.

Another main event was the mission conference January 7 and 8. We were honored to have Pastor Luis Ramos as our speaker. The Lord used him to inspire and motivate our people to do more for missions than we did last year. We are taking on several new missionaries.

It was a joy to have my son, Tommy, and his wife, Mona, and their five children here over the Christmas holidays. But more than a vacation, their trip was also for the purpose of checking out some possibilities for different ministries. Lord willing, they will be moving to the field some time this year, and among the many ministries God has laid on their hearts, is the desire to begin a radio ministry, establishing the only Baptist radio station in this area. There are men in our church who speak the Chol, Tzotzil, and Tzeltal dialects. So besides reaching the Spanish population, he will also, with the help of these men, be able to minister to the different tribes in our area.

We are seeing people saved and baptized, and broken homes reunited. What a wonderful, rewarding life the Lord has given me!...I just heard little birth cries! I’m crying, too!

Your friend,
Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

Christmas day at Mimi's house!

2010-01-29T15:40:00.017-06:00

Gaby and Andrew were the first ones up on Christmas morning.

Checking out who the gifts are for

Most of my grand-treasures who were able to be with me on Christmas morning

Tommy and Mona

Andrew and Anna

Ulises and Fizzie

Andrew and Jason singing "Silent Night"

Anna accompanying on the piano

Singing Christmas carols

Ulises' devotion, "The Name of Jesus"

Jason... "The Night Before Christmas" pocho style

The kids enjoying Aunt Fizzie's version of "I Want a Hippopotamos for Christmas!"

Tommy and Mona passed out the gifts

Opening one of my gifts while another of my gifts looks on!

Checking out Jackie's gift

Andrew is happy about his present!

Mona with her gift from me

What did Olivia get?

Tea set for the girls

Show us what's in the bag, Jason!

Merry Christmas, Jason! From Sarah... "I've always wanted a possum for Christmas!"

Jason and Sarah's five beautiful children

Mad Santa (the children played first, and then the adults)

Decorating for Christmas...

2010-01-28T16:32:00.001-06:00

In the next few posts, I will be sharing pictures from the holidays, which we spent in my home of Chiapas, Mexico.

Fizzie, my daughter, and Mona, my daughter-in-law, did most of the decorating

My beautiful granddaughters (Anna's daughter Debbie and Fizzie's daughter Sophie) intently watching and learning tree-decorating skills

Sophie... still watching

Sammy (Philip's son) and Debbie admiring the finished product

My living room, decorated for Christmas... and awaiting the arrival of my children and grandchildren!

Epidemic

2010-01-24T13:15:00.000-06:00

“…The harvest truly is plenteous, but the labourers are few;” Matthew 9:37

I am writing this the day after our Mission Conference here in San Cristóbal. It seems a fitting time, while my heart is still full, and feeling challenged to do more for missions this year than I did last year, to write a devotional that has been buried in my heart for several months now.

Last year, an epidemic called Swine Flu swept through the country of México as well as throughout many other countries around the world. January 10-16 has been chosen as National Influenza Vaccination Week, encouraging people to continue vaccinations beyond the holiday season. Whether or not you decide to be vaccinated, the fact still remains: our country has experienced the effects of an epidemic.

The dictionary defines epidemic as widespread, wide-ranging, general, sweeping, prevailing, rampant, prevalent, rife, pandemic The epidemic that weighs heavily on my heart is not in the area of disease. It’s a spiritual epidemic, and I pray that by sharing one of the greatest burdens I have ever felt, you will not only help me to carry my burden, but also someone will be able to help.

I wrote a secret list of seventeen missionaries and their wives, who are no longer on the mission field. They are in the USA, and no longer serve on the field where God called them to serve. These are not missionaries I’ve read about, or heard about. These are people whom I know personally, and whom I love with all my heart. Besides these seventeen couples, another couple who was on deputation, discontinued their preparation, and are in the USA. The husband now works in a secular job. An older couple, still on the mission field, is preparing to return to the USA to head up a missionary training center. They are leaving a large, thriving work in the hands of a younger missionary couple.

Missionaries are dropping like flies all over the world…in epidemic proportion. And it’s breaking my heart. I have put off writing this for a long time, because I never want to judge, or tell people how to run their lives. I would never reveal these names, but I feel at liberty to share some observations about these people.

Causes for leaving the mission field: immorality, returning to USA to pastor churches, family problems, discouragement, following advice received from pastors to discontinue deputation, or to return to head up training center.

Observations: 11 of these 17 missionaries left large, strong works. Four left for purposes of immorality.

As far as I know only one of the seventeen couples is doing deputation, and will soon return to the mission field.

I don’t know if I have ever heard a sermon encouraging “drop-outs” to return to the mission field. We don’t seem too concerned for them. In fact, it is my observation that there is a strong endeavor to encourage these missionaries to pursue ministries in the USA, almost to the extent of feeling a certain pride for “rescuing” those who no longer serve on the foreign field, by placing them in unique ministries which enable them to use knowledge and experience acquired on the mission field. For example, teaching Spanish in a Bible Institute, starting ministries which target ethnic groups from the missionary’s former field.

I pray this prayer every morning for each of these missionaries, as I call them by name: “Lord, help them to return to the mission field where they belong.” I know there are sins we can commit which disqualify us from certain areas in the Lord’s work. We must use extreme discretion, and wisdom in handling disciplining, and I thank the Lord He made me a woman, and has put that task on the shoulders of men. I thank the Lord for pastors who are firm in their stand, and strict in separation and clean living. We should never be guilty of smoothing over sin, as though it only deserved a slap on the hand. Immoral living in the ministry should be dealt with.

But in their zeal to purify the ministry, I fear we are losing quality workers…men and women, and consequently children, who have mastered the language of their field, who have learned customs, and even in some cases, feel more at home on their mission field than in their own native country. I often wonder how many “drop-out” missionaries have children who, if they had continued their service on the mission field, would have children who would someday follow in their parents’ footsteps. What better missionary candidates than those who grew up on the mission field, speaking the foreign language as well as their native language! That’s what happened to me 44 years ago!

I am a missionary. My surrender to the mission field is as personal as my surrender to the Lord when I was saved. I feel highly honored, and at the risk of sounding proud, I consider myself special to have been chosen by the Lord to serve as a missionary. In my way of thinking, it is the highest calling a person can receive.

I often wonder in the early hours of the morning, as I prepare my heart to serve another day on the mission field, “How would I feel if I were suddenly advised to return to the USA to teach in a Bible Institute, or to be dorm mom to college girls? What if someday my children decide I’m too old to function as I did when I was younger? Will health problems ever demand my living out of my beloved home, far, far from my México?”

What an emptiness, what a sadness that brings to my heart, to even contemplate the thoughts of ever, ever leaving the mission field where God called me 44 years ago, and where I have lived for almost 50 years! I believe the Bible teaches “Once saved, always saved.”

And I believe with all my heart, “Once a missionary, always a missionary,” and don’t ever try to convince me otherwise. And my loving advice to you, if a woman even dare to give advice to the man of God is, “Except for immoral issues, don’t ever take a man or woman off the mission field. You can take the boy off the mission field, but you can’t take the mission field out of the boy…nor out of the girl.”

And to you missionaries out there, you know who you are, if you know me. And even maybe others I don’t know, I know you’re not happy. You don’t feel fulfilled, if you were ever really called. No matter how nobly you are serving in the USA, no matter how much the Lord is blessing your ministry, go back…GO BACK…How can you make an appeal to young people to surrender to the mission field, if you have left the one where you left your heart? Do the people you pastor know they’re not your first love? Do they know they were your second choice? You’re not happy, no you’re not!

I sit here writing with a broken heart, and through tears…not as a judge, but as someone who knows you personally. I love you, and as only a friend who loves you enough to tell you the truth: go back…GO BACK! Go back to where God called you. Go back where the blessings are. Let USA pastors train men from their own works to take over their church when they’re gone or too old to pastor. But you go back where you belong, and stay there until God takes you Home.” That’s what Tom Sloan did!...

…and that’s what I plan to do!

December 2009 Prayer Letter and Essay "If You Could Come Back"

2009-12-24T09:42:00.003-06:00

I am writing this letter between Thanksgiving and Christmas. And I can be nothing but thankful for God’s manifold blessings, in my ministry, in the lives of my children, and upon me personally. As far as I know, I enjoy excellent health, my eight children and their spouses love and serve the Lord. In the past year God has given me two new grandsons, and spared the life of my daughter, Ruthie, from being kidnapped.

And I have been honored to have had thirty-seven people saved in my ladies’ ministries, and Vacation Bible School.

Our Ladies’ Christmas Banquet this year was outstanding: Pastor Omar Torres did an excellent job, as he preached to the seventy-five ladies in attendance. When he gave the invitation, five were saved…two of those were former First Ladies of our town. Thank you for the part you had in this ministry so dear to my heart. We are already making plans for next year’s Banquet, which will take place November 19, 2010.

ISABEL, First Lady who was saved the night of the banquet

ME WITH MERCEDES, the other First Lady who was saved the night of the banquet

ME WITH MAYORS WIVES

At least for me, one of the most touching features on the program was the participation of twenty-one orphans from a nearby town. A pastor and his beautiful wife, and three precious children are in charge of the care of these delinquent little street irchens, and I watched the wives of mayors wipe tears from their eyes as the pastor told stories behind some of these children’s lives. Hearts were so stirred, that the Lord has moved my son, Philip, who is the pastor here, to present to our church the challenge of starting a children’s home. Will you pray for this very, very needy ministry?

For many people, like my children and me, who have lost loved ones to death, this time of the year holds a twinge of sadness. This year’s banquet theme was “Not of this World.” To you who have lost a loved one this year, or who hold dear precious memories of years gone by, I dedicate this little essay which I wrote and read at our Banquet. My prayer is that it will stir up in each of us an urgency, and a desire to do more for the Lord next year than we did in the past.

I wish you a Blessed Christmas, and a New Year filled with God’s richest blessings.

Billie Sloan
Nahum 1:7

“If You Could Come Back”

Written and read at our 2009 Ladies’ Christmas Banquet

by Billie Sloan

In a few days my children and I will be commemorating the fifth anniversary of the day my husband went to Heaven. Not long ago, one of my daughters dreamed about her Dad. She dreamed that he came back to earth, and spent the day with us. I don’t put any importance on dreams, but when she told me about hers, tears came into my eyes, because I still miss him very much.

A few days later, I started thinking about her dream, and I asked myself: “What would my husband do if he could come back to earth for one day? What would he think of me, and of the changes that have taken place in my life? Would he be pleased with the activities I’ve added to my routine, with the way I spend my money?

If he could come back, I believe I knew my husband well enough, that I’m sure he’d take me by the hand and perhaps he would take me for a walk down the streets of our town, and he’d show me the little abandoned children, the little barefoot girls with tangled hair, and he’d say, “Look at the things that are not of this world. And may everything you do, every penny you spend, all your travels have an influence on the things that are not of this world. Those are the souls of these children, and their eternal destiny.”

Perhaps my husband would continue, “I have walked on streets of gold. I’ve seen the face of Jesus. And only when you can see things as I see them, are you going to be able to distinguish between the eternal, and the earthly. The things of this world will pass away, but the most precious thing in this world is the eternal destiny of those who surround you. Shop for dresses and for cars. Put your legal matters in order. Enjoy life, but if all those things you buy, all your legal transactions do not influence the eternal destiny of your friends, your grandchildren, and the street children, it’s all in vain…all of this world.

And I believe he’d look into my eyes when he said, “The only thing I could take with me to Heaven were the souls of the people I won to Christ. Every door I knocked, every Bible I gave away, every message I preached was time invested in eternity. That’s the only thing that matters.”

If God has taken from you the most precious treasure of your life, a son, a daughter, your father, your mother, your husband, I’m sure if they could come back to earth, they’d tell you, “Put your eyes on things that are not of this world. Spend more time with people than with your hobbies. Spend more hours with your children than on your job. And may all you do lead people to the feet of Jesus. Oh! And make sure you’re prepared to see your Creator face to face when you die, and that you’ll walk on streets of gold.”

That’s what our loved ones would tell us if they could come back.

Banquets, Brides, and Bubble Baths

2009-12-23T14:07:00.001-06:00

(Written less than a week before the November 20th banquet)...

I wish with all my heart you could be here during this time. Even as I sit here, I am watching my daughter in law cut out her dress for the gala evening, our 11th Annual Ladies’ Christmas Banquet, which will take place, Lord willing, in less than a week. A lady in the church, who is a dressmaker, delivered mine to me last night, and as always, refused the money I offered her for all her hours and hours of work.

Right now, my daughter is in town with her nephew, and little girl, and my dressmaker, shopping for material and evening finery, giving out last minute invitations, and picking out gifts for the two little girls of our guest speaker.

Yes, this has all the feelings and emotions of a wedding, a wedding we hold here every year, the week before Thanksgiving. I almost feel like a bride, and I have a church and house full of attendants. And since we do this every single year, everyone basically knows what to expect, and how I will react to certain things.

I’m doing something different this year: I’m going to pamper myself. I usually work myself silly until about an hour before the banquet, and walk in feeling a bit anxious. But this year, I have reserved myself a room for the night before at the hotel where the banquet will be held. I don’t really know how this will help my disposition, but I have the illusion of somehow staying “separated” from the world, and arriving at the banquet all smiles, not having upset one single person, or without their having annoyed me.

But I’m wondering, “Does it really work that way?” I’ve wondered, ever since I was a young girl, it people who can’t speak somehow have a closer walk with the Lord. Many sins, and I’ll confess that probably most of mine, are committed with the tongue, through the words I say. Rarely do I ever go to bed at night, with the peace that I haven’t said something I shouldn’t have said…unless I’ve spent a rare day alone, and “stay away from the computer, Sloan, or you’re bound to write something that would have come out of your mouth, if that person had been in your presence.”

Anyway, aside from the spiritual aspect of my spending the last 24 hours alone before the banquet, there is the “pampering” aspect of this extravaganza. As I was combing my hair a few mornings ago, I noticed a lovely bottle of something I received in a “fruit” basket on one of my recent speaking trips. I receive these thoughtful gifts when I’m invited to speak to ladies’ groups. They’re usually setting on the table in my hotel room, and besides the flavored water, granola bars, and M&M’s, sometimes there will be a box of stationery, lovely handkerchiefs (I carry one every time I go up to speak), and once I even received a beautiful watch, which I still wear. Recently I received a whole set of goodies from Bath and Body. I don’t know what I’ve been waiting for to enjoy them, but I noticed one of them said, “Passion…Bubble Bath,” and I thought, “Why not?” Now aside from the fact that bathtubs are non-existent in México, unless you build your own home, I decided to add this, and the accompanying bottles on my list of “Things to Take to the Hotel.” I’m not sure what I’ll do with it, but it should look nice setting on the dressing table.

This morning, I thought, “Isn’t there a verse in the Bible that says something about our being in the world but not of the world?” While I believe my motives are pretty good excuses for simply wanting to pamper myself on this special occasion, I believe the Lord expects us to be able to remain sweet and calm, even though we’re in the middle of a storm, whether it be sudden disaster, or simply having to cope with other people.

“Lord, thank you for this special treat away from the cares and pressures of the world. But help me to always be sweet and kind, and understanding, even when things go wrong.”

Anchors, Assurance, and Anna

2009-11-18T14:11:00.003-06:00

“Anchors, Assurance, and Anna”

No event of this nature would be complete without a big setback. I have a beautiful journal which I received in a fruit basket from some ladies in a church where I spoke. I chose this thick, hard back book several months ago to use in preparation for our upcoming Ladies’ Christmas Banquet, which takes place in only three days.

If you’re a list maker like I am, you’ll understand the feeling a list gives you. It provides security, a sense of direction, a constant in the midst of confusion. For me, at least, it’s my anchor.

I also put little red letters with the initials of people who are responsible for carrying out the tasks on my lists, and over and over again as I check my list every morning, I see little red “A’s”. That stands for my daughter, Anna. She’s my “anchorman” of sorts.

Saturday afternoon, we received word that her father in law had passed away. She began packing hers and the children’s things to join Andrés, who was with his Dad at the time of his death. He was a four-hour drive away. She packed my car, loaded the children, and thankfully Andrés’ nephew and his wife were able to go with her, as she headed out about 7:30 p.m., promising to return Thursday, the day before the Banquet.

As I stood in the middle of the street, waving good-bye to them, suddenly I felt disoriented. What on earth would I do without her? What about all the things she still needed to do?

A dark cloud began to settle over me, as I prepared for bed. I woke up Sunday morning at 4:30, and decided to get up, instead of lying in bed trying to figure out who would take Anna’s place. I was also grieving with Andrés, whose father was a devout Christian man. Several years ago, he assured his son that he was ready to go to Heaven. Anna commented when she received the news of his death, “I know he had devotions with his children last night, because he gathers us around at night when we’re there, and sings in Chol, reads Scripture, and prays.”

This is Tuesday morning, and thankfully as I write Anna and the children are on their way back. They left at 5:30 this morning, and Andrés will join her on Thursday. Last night when I read her phone message, everything began to come into focus, and to make sense. I felt like my anchor was once again firm, and in place.

As I crawled under my covers last night, a sense of peace and joy settled over me. Everyone would soon be in their proper place. Anna would be back, and my life would be in order.

Then I thought, “How sinful to put our trust in man…or woman…or daughter, or husband. My anchor should be in the Lord, Who, just as He gave assurance to Andrés that his Dad is in Heaven, can give me the security, and stable feeling that He, not Anna, is in control of everything. He is the One Who took Andrés’ Dad. It is wicked, sinful I who puts my trust in the wrong anchor. My assurance should lie in The Anchor.”

Babies, Banquets and Blessings

2009-11-10T12:06:00.001-06:00

Babies, Banquets, and Blessings!

Anyone who knows all that goes into the preparation of an event like our annual Christmas banquets, knows it is not the work of one person. There are many, many people involved in this special ministry. My children, the ladies in my Sunday School class, their husbands, young people in the church, even ladies in the States…all form a team, each with his and her unique part.

My son, Philip, who is also the pastor, made a trip to a nearby town last Thursday. When he returned, he was excited about having visited a pastor friend, who also runs an orphanage. There are about 21 children, ranging in ages from 12 years to a baby a few months old. He and his wife are in charge of this challenging ministry. It was his wife who invited the first lady of their town to attend our banquet last year, and she did. I’m sure they work closely with the DIF, an organization which among other admirable achievements, is in charge of looking out for the welfare of needy women and children. The first lady of every city, and the first lady of every state is the head of this government organization, which is what makes it so easy to get in contact with them.

Philip suggested that we have these orphans attend our banquet. “They sing, and I believe they would be a blessing to the ladies. And they’re very well behaved.” At first, I didn’t know what on earth I would do with twenty-one children…not during their time on the program, but for the other three-plus hours they would need to be at the hotel.

This brings me to another challenge we face every single year: what to do with babies of mothers who are actively involved in the program, namely my grandchildren. All the ladies in our church, and the teenage girls, have either bought tickets, and/or will be busy during the evening. This year our choir will be performing, so there go our baby sitters. So I came up with a bright idea about a month ago:

Why not reserve rooms for my four children and their spouses who will be attending? In years gone by, the hotel is kind enough to give us a “courtesy room,” which is a regular room. We have all these children in one room, with four sitters. The mothers feel compelled to relieve the girls once the program is over, and dinner is being served. This makes for chaos, since babies are then brought into the banquet room. The mothers are not really able to enjoy the most relaxing time of the whole evening, because they are looking after babies, and sharing the food on their plates.

Because each of my children and their children will have their own room, they will be able to: check in as early as 12:00 noon. They can give their children lunch, put them down for naps, and leisurely dress for the banquet. Instead of loading up babies, banquet equipment, baby equipment, evening attire, and accessories, etc., they simply step out of their rooms, and into the banquet room.

Eight girls will be assigned as sitters for the evening, two for each room of babies. They will be able to rotate every hour, and will be seated at a table at the back, so as not to disturb. This way, the girls will be able to enjoy the evening, and so will the mothers…but more than that…so will the babies. After the evening has ended, my children return to their rooms, babies in jammies, and they don’t have to drag them through the cold to take them home. Except for the time at the first of the program, when they will be singing, they will be in their rooms, with their own sitter.

But what to do with 21 orphans, remembering that they also have to be fed? My girls plan to feed their babies in their rooms…cereal, yogurt, sandwiches, juices, fruit, etc. But the orphans will have to be fed from the hotel menu, since they will not be in a private room. At the beginning of the year, before I came up with the idea of reserving rooms for my children, I reserved a big play room. So we plan to use that room for the twenty-one children during the time they will not be participating. We have two major…I hate the word problem, so I’ll use challenges: what to feed them, and who to keep them.

Mr. Administrator? Philip has assured me that he will take full responsibility of this part of the banquet, so sure he is that this will be an unforgettable feature. So do I! He has already arranged for one of the men to drive the church van over and pick them up, and return them afterward. I know the other two challenges will be solved, also, very efficiently and competently.

This Banquet is geared to women…women’s needs, their challenges. And I also appeal to their nature. I believe just seeing these children, hearing them sing, listening to the pastor share where they come from is going to touch even the coldest heart that evening.

Music sets the atmosphere, and my grandchildren will touch hearts that evening, as they did mine last night during rehearsal. When hearts are moved and stirred, I believe it is easier for the Holy Spirit to speak to them.

I tell the ladies in my class: “These socialites are invited to more events than they could possibly ever attend. So why do they keep coming back year after year to this particular one? They tell me the reason every year when they tell me good bye: ‘Thank you, Billie, for a wonderful evening. This is the highlight of my year, and I would never miss it. My heart is always stirred when the evening is over.’ That’s why they keep coming back.” And that’s why I’ll keep giving them, as long as I’m able…even with all the challenges of babies at banquets…it’s the blessings.

My Christmas Banquet

2009-11-06T18:05:00.001-06:00

Friday, November 6

I love what my friend, Garry said the first time he wrote on his blog: shameless self-promotion. Isn’t that pretty funny? But I guess that pretty much sums up what a BLOG is.

More than this being about me, I would like it to be some sort of connection between you and my ministry. True, my ministry involves my children and grandchildren, since I’m a mother and grandmother. But something very, very dear to my heart, also, is the annual Ladies’ Christmas Banquet our church sponsors. This will be our 11th one, on November 20, and I can truthfully say, they get more and more involved every year. I would like to take you through the next two weeks’ preparations so you can “feel” the excitement we feel…the stresses, the challenges, and finally the reward of all our labors, prayers, time, and money required to put together an event like this.

At exactly two weeks away from our Banquet date, this is just the “winding things up” time, which is probably why I even have time to sit at my computer. The work began, as always, the day after last year’s banquet.

My son in law, Ulises, and my daughter, “Fizzie” picked me up about 10:00, and took me out for breakfast. They were doing deputation, and wanted me to accompany them on a little “field trip” to survey the nearby town of Tuxtla. We were all pretty exhausted, but enjoyed talking about the events of the past evening.

A few days later, I flew with them to Mexico City, and met Pastor Omar Torres, and his lovely wife Ana. They graciously hosted our over-night stay. We had breakfast in their home the next morning, and then drove to Querétaro, where we would spend a few days, before driving to Chihuahua to spend Thanksgiving with my brother, Lanny, and his family. It was on that drive, having rested for several days after the banquet, that Ulises began to talk with me very openly about this event so dear to my heart. He began to make suggestions that might possibly make the banquet better, and then he said. “One thing I noticed the night of the banquet was that you were a little stressed. It’s all right to get angry, but no one should know it but you. Everyone knew you were upset at the boys for not coming in on cue to sing when they were supposed to. What you need is a banquet administrator, someone who can take the work load off your shoulders, leaving you free to prepare your essays, and organize your program, visit your ladies, etc.” So I chose him. He accepted, and while he hasn’t been able to be here like I would like him to be, he has put in a lot of time organizing and directing. He has made suggestions such as monthly prayer breakfasts the last three months before the banquet; a pre-banquet celebration of sorts. At these prayer breakfasts, we pray for the first lady of our town, and for the wives of former mayors. We even have a former lady mayor attend…the first female mayor in the history of our city.

He also suggested that starting right after last year’s banquet, each lady in the church reserve her ticket…about $18 dollars…with at least $1.50. As the year goes by, she can pay a little each week, until her ticket is paid for. Many of our ladies have already purchased their tickets, and are working on their 2nd and 3rd ones, to give to their lost friends.

It would take volumes to name all the things that go into the banquet preparations, but if you could be here, you would sense, as I do, the atmosphere of wedding preparations. Choice of invitations…Anna is responsible for that…decorations, centerpieces, personal gifts for each lady who attends, and corsages for each special lady…this is Liz’s department. Anna also is in charge of special music rehearsals, organizing the music for each singer, banquet programs. These girls homeschool their two children, and Liz also has a three-month old to care for, not to mention her duties as pastor’s wife.

Last night was the second workshop to prepare decorations, centerpieces, etc., and I’ll try to post a picture of the 20 ladies I had in my dining room last night, crowded around my table.

I have given out packets to the first ladies who are invited every year. These packets contain: corsage, invitation, ticket, and a card with my phone numbers. These have to be given out about three weeks before the banquet.

This year’s banquet will be given at a lovely hotel. We will have access to a large banquet room, complete with a platform. This will make it much easier for our ladies to see the people who will be participating in the program.

A special item on our program this year will be the children’s segment. About 20 children from an orphanage in a nearby town will be coming to sing. My grandchildren, also, have prepared two songs, and my dear friend, Debbie Morris, from Tuxtla will be coming the week of the banquet to teach them to play several Christmas songs with bells. Doesn’t this sound like fun?

My daughter, Anna, came up with the idea of taking an invitation packet to our state capitol, and inviting our governor’s wife. Excellent idea!

Ladies from the Beacon Hill Baptist Church have worked all year long purchasing gifts for our first ladies, and they have arrived, and are safely stored in my closet.

Our guest speaker for this year is the pastor I met last year, Pastor Omar Torres. He and his wife, Ana, and their two little girls will fly in the day before the Banquet, and he will be speaking that evening in Ulises church in Chiapa de Corzo, about 40 minutes away.

Anna is just putting the finishing touches on Debbie’s dress, and I know she will look like a little princess when she sings.

Ulises and Fizzie will be returning Wednesday from a two-week series of speaking engagements…YIPES, MR. ADMINISTRATOR!...just a week and a half before the banquet! But not to worry, everything is in order, and running smoothly, so far.

As in anything which requires cooperation, I always pray for a spirit of unity, and harmony in all we do. We are one big happy family, but even big happy families don’t always see eye-to-eye. So will you please pray for the Lord to keep the important things in mind, and just accept the other things we don’t like?

End of first post! Now if I can just figure out how to get it out of WORD and to you!

Billie Sloan

Nahum 1:7